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Serenity
11-01-2008, 06:12 PM
Before anyone jumps all over me for...well, whatever reason, this is being posted by a woman and I got it from a woman. I simply found it funny, so come find the funny with me. :D

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' ... That will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F*** YOU!

(9) Don't worry about it, Iíll do it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

GeorgieB
11-01-2008, 06:18 PM
Mwuhahahaha! That is funny.

But, I've heard every one of those "replies" and always wondered what they really meant. Now I know--but it's way too late. Where were you when I needed help?

HeronW
11-01-2008, 06:37 PM
Serenity, you just gave away our secrets! lol
Not to worry, the chances of all of them staying in males' minds permanently is slim. :}

dpaterso
11-01-2008, 06:39 PM
All these secret codes to remember. It's safer just to do nothing and say, "You're right again."

Cross-posted with Heron. I hope it's not some kind of telepathy. I'm useless at that, too.

-Derek

Mr Flibble
11-01-2008, 06:42 PM
Snicker - those are funny.

Actually my personal fave, guaranteed to give my Old Man the tremors, is muttering 'Men! Can't live with 'em, can't kill 'em'

He usually spends five minutes racking his brains before remembering I've asked him to do something 8 times now and it might be time he GOT ON WITH IT!


All these secret codes to remember. It's safer just to do nothing and say, "You're right again." Very wise.

regdog
11-01-2008, 11:06 PM
Great list and oh so true but you forgot one

uh-HU which really means-You have to be a complete moron if you think I believe that crock of s**t

SPMiller
11-02-2008, 12:37 AM
I break up with women when they start this bullshit. I guess that's why I'm single most of the time :D

Bravo
11-02-2008, 12:46 AM
good list.

here's one more-

"Yea, she's cute." translation: she's a threat, dont bring her up again, and dont you dare take another look at her.

slcboston
11-02-2008, 12:46 AM
I break up with women when they start this bullshit. I guess that's why I'm single most of the time :D

whatever. :D

(hey, what do you know, it works for guys, too :D)

DL Hegel
11-02-2008, 12:49 AM
whatever. :D

(hey, what do you know, it works for guys, too :D)
:ROFL:

Susie
11-02-2008, 02:33 AM
:ROFL: Very funny, Serenity!

truelyana
11-02-2008, 03:21 AM
I don't feel I say any of the above. I gather I don't qualify for the 'womens' club, considering I am partially both female and male in gender, and my mind is neutral in gear.

Skye Jules
11-02-2008, 04:40 AM
My God, that is so true! I only use those in play arguments. Sometimes we'll play argue about stupid things. For example:

My boyfriend: Can I shave your head?

Me: No

Boyfriend: Why

Me: Because I said so!

Boyfriend: Why, bunny, why?

Me: *sighs* Whatever!

Jersey Chick
11-02-2008, 04:55 AM
Perfect! :D

willfulone
11-02-2008, 04:58 AM
Gave me a laugh. Thanks for sharing!

Christine

JoNightshade
11-02-2008, 05:03 AM
I'm embarrassed that I didn't even need to read the definition of any of those words to understand them. :)

Cassiopeia
11-02-2008, 07:15 AM
All these secret codes to remember. It's safer just to do nothing and say, "You're right again."

-DerekTelling me that I'm right again is immediately taken as angst and sarcasm. I never knew I could go from smiling to raving lunatic so fast until someone said that to me.

Clair Dickson
11-02-2008, 07:19 AM
Huh. I don't do any of those. I happen to believe in saying exactly what I mean. If I'm done with an argument, I say so. If I want hubby to go fuck himself, I'll say it loud enough for the neighbors at the end of the road to hear.

I don't like lying (like saying 'it's okay' when it's not... or that 'nothing' is wrong... ick) or any of the other things in this list.

I've always been a strange bird, favoring honesty, openness and friendship in a relationship. But if this works for the rest of you-- go for it. We each have our own individual relationships and our own criteria for what is important in a relationship.

(BTW-- would you appreciate if your spouse told you 'nothing' was wrong when really there was/ is? Do unto to others or something...)

Nakhlasmoke
11-02-2008, 09:47 AM
Oh yeah.. I do all of these.

:D

Cassiopeia
11-02-2008, 10:09 AM
Huh. I don't do any of those. I happen to believe in saying exactly what I mean. If I'm done with an argument, I say so. If I want hubby to go fuck himself, I'll say it loud enough for the neighbors at the end of the road to hear.

I don't like lying (like saying 'it's okay' when it's not... or that 'nothing' is wrong... ick) or any of the other things in this list.

I've always been a strange bird, favoring honesty, openness and friendship in a relationship. But if this works for the rest of you-- go for it. We each have our own individual relationships and our own criteria for what is important in a relationship.

(BTW-- would you appreciate if your spouse told you 'nothing' was wrong when really there was/ is? Do unto to others or something...)Um, this was meant to be a funny thread. You are coming across as accusing people of being dishonest here and I think that's a bit harsh.

maestrowork
11-02-2008, 05:55 PM
Here's one from the man's guidebook (at the risk of having my man card taken away):

You're not fat, dear -- it really means "yes, you are, now shut the F up and let me watch the rest of the game in peace and quiet."

benbradley
11-02-2008, 06:48 PM
...
(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F*** YOU!
I thought that's what "Thank you for sharing" meant, but, whatever ...

StoryG27
11-02-2008, 06:55 PM
I use "whatever" and "fine" quite often when I'm not happy, and I am surprised at how accurate these definitions are. :D

Cassiopeia
11-02-2008, 07:11 PM
I've decided to pick up using whatever more often. It seems to stop any further discussion. Usually when I say whatever, I'm tired of sitting there while someone else tries to convince me they are right.

I said whatever to my son last night and he laughed and left me alone. IT WORKS! :D

Clair Dickson
11-02-2008, 09:26 PM
Um, this was meant to be a funny thread. You are coming across as accusing people of being dishonest here and I think that's a bit harsh.

Oh. I'm sorry. I really I didn't know that this was supposed to be funny. My mistake. I've never been real good at understanding these sort of things that women say and do.

I didn't mean to be harsh.

If these are true and successful methods of communication for anyone, I don't mean to sound judgmental. We do all have to do what works in our relationship(s). I'm sorry to have rained on the fun.

Carry on. I'll go play somewhere else. (Leaves female club card on counter and slinks away.)

dpaterso
11-02-2008, 09:54 PM
Telling me that I'm right again is immediately taken as angst and sarcasm. I never knew I could go from smiling to raving lunatic so fast until someone said that to me.
Well, okay. I'm wrong again. Better?


Carry on. I'll go play somewhere else. (Leaves female club card on counter and slinks away.)
Yup, that's how these threads usually go...

-Derek

StoryG27
11-02-2008, 09:59 PM
Carry on. I'll go play somewhere else. (Leaves female club card on counter and slinks away.)
Whatever.

Well, okay. I'm wrong again. Better?


Fine.





:D


I kid. I kid.

rhymegirl
11-02-2008, 10:34 PM
I break up with women when they start this bullshit. I guess that's why I'm single most of the time :D

Looks like you're gonna be single forever.

Cuz I'm pretty sure most of us say these things.

rhymegirl
11-02-2008, 10:41 PM
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

I love this one and I do it a lot.

maestrowork
11-02-2008, 11:59 PM
At least my girlfriend was very clear on the "fine" part: "Fine, be that way" was the way she put it. I'd know she was pissed: no ambiguity at all.

Ken
11-03-2008, 12:11 AM
"let's just remain friends."

:cry:

Cassiopeia
11-03-2008, 02:03 AM
Looks like you're gonna be single forever.

Cuz I'm pretty sure most of us say these things.And I'm afraid I have to say that every man I know has said, whatever or it's fine or nothing. We all are guilty, except Claire ;) ( don't want to lump EVERYONE in this)

Cassiopeia
11-03-2008, 02:05 AM
Well, okay. I'm wrong again. Better?

-DerekI dunno, did you meant it? :D

rhymegirl
11-03-2008, 02:43 AM
"let's just remain friends."

:cry:

Aww, Ken.

That one bites for sure. I think we've all heard that one before.

maestrowork
11-03-2008, 05:33 AM
Aww, Ken.

That one bites for sure. I think we've all heard that one before.

Not really. Usually all I got was a "stay away from me, you freak" phone call or text message, or both, at the same time.

rhymegirl
11-03-2008, 06:25 AM
Not really. Usually all I got was a "stay away from me, you freak" phone call or text message, or both, at the same time.

Stay away from me, you freak. ;)

C.bronco
11-03-2008, 06:38 AM
How 'bout this one: PICK UP YOUR @#%*&(% OFF THE FLOOR AND PUT IT IN THE %&(*%^$ HAMPER!!!!!

Serenity
11-03-2008, 07:11 AM
Not really. Usually all I got was a "stay away from me, you freak" phone call or text message, or both, at the same time.

This coming from the guy who said he thought I was going to rob him... :hat:

MacAllister
11-03-2008, 07:17 AM
There's that thing with mothers, too. When they use your full name - your middle name, too - you just know it's gonna be bad.

Ken
11-03-2008, 08:02 AM
...was only called by my first, last, and middle name once. My 2nd grade teacher did so when my buddy and I were caught playing hookey. Yep, I knew I was in for it alright.

Lyra Jean
11-03-2008, 10:15 AM
Not really. Usually all I got was a "stay away from me, you freak" phone call or text message, or both, at the same time.

Maybe you should wait longer before showing them your chocolate pants. ;)

Stlight
11-03-2008, 12:54 PM
I never used a particular set of words, maybe it's different elsewhere but down here, yes in the "south" if you hit a deep southern accent - mine rivals Dixie Carter when I'm pissed - most guys just run out of the house. They come back in a couple of hours and slowly open the door to see if whatever was wrong is over. They just know it couldn't have been anything they did.

Never, ever, of course not.

S

Pagey's_Girl
11-03-2008, 05:41 PM
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F*** YOU!

Those two in particular are entirely accurate....at least coming from me. :ROFL:

The left out one, though - "That's your decision." In other words, do NOT come crying to me when you realize you really screwed up, because I tried to warn you it wasn't a good idea and you didn't want to listen... (Such as the time my father decided to "clean up" his computer by deleting abunch on windows files he decided he didn't need. Maybe he didn't need them but the computer sure did....)

cray
11-03-2008, 06:07 PM
for the kids out there,...
don't think you know anything after reading this thread. the meaning of the things women say can be changed at any time.

without warning.

rhymegirl
11-03-2008, 06:25 PM
for the kids out there,...
don't think you know anything after reading this thread. the meaning of the things women say can be changed at any time.

without warning.

What are you talking about, Cray???

Fine.

Whatever.

What do I mean by that?

Nothing.

Or something.

(heavy sigh)

Are you telling me my butt looks fat in these pants?

(silence)

I'm not mad.

No, I'm not.

How many sugars do you want in your coffee? (loud sigh)

Yes, I made the coffee.

Again.

No, of course I didn't mind making it. Again.

Did you take out the trash?

Fine.

I'll do it.

Of course I don't mind. (heavy sigh)

cray
11-03-2008, 06:30 PM
:roll:

exactly.


and here's what's going through our heads while you're talking:

http://www.diviniti.demon.co.uk/Small%20Hypnosis%20Spiral.gif

Pagey's_Girl
11-03-2008, 08:27 PM
for the kids out there,...
don't think you know anything after reading this thread. the meaning of the things women say can be changed at any time.

without warning.

Crap. He broke the code. We have to kill him. :tongue

maestrowork
11-03-2008, 08:44 PM
There's that thing with mothers, too. When they use your full name - your middle name, too - you just know it's gonna be bad.

What's worse is if my mom uses my brother's FULL name when addressing me. That's when I know I'm in deep s**t.

Darzian
11-03-2008, 08:45 PM
It's not fair for a gender to have it's own code.

maestrowork
11-03-2008, 08:45 PM
This coming from the guy who said he thought I was going to rob him... :hat:

What was I supposed to think? You looked mean, although I knew I could so kick your ass...