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View Full Version : Unabashed! Unashamed! NAKED HOUSEHOLD APPLIANCES!



BenPanced
10-15-2008, 09:39 AM
http://pics.livejournal.com/benpanced/pic/00099t8w http://pics.livejournal.com/benpanced/pic/0009b3hs

http://pics.livejournal.com/benpanced/pic/0009cper http://pics.livejournal.com/benpanced/pic/0009dp95

http://pics.livejournal.com/benpanced/pic/0009e40d http://pics.livejournal.com/benpanced/pic/0009a5dr

:e2thud::e2faint:

Cranky
10-15-2008, 09:40 AM
Hey, that's my blender! Why, that no-good cheat!

BenPanced
10-15-2008, 09:41 AM
...oops...

JoNightshade
10-15-2008, 10:00 AM
Is it wrong if I actually am slightly turned on by shiny new household appliances?

http://www.amazon.com/Sunbeam-2379-Mixmaster-Stand-Chrome/dp/B0007Y3A9C

http://www.amazon.com/Bosch-Nexxt-800-WTZ1295P-Pedestal/dp/B0011YLRVA/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&s=home-garden&qid=1224050417&sr=1-3

Zoombie
10-15-2008, 11:55 AM
As someone who writes smoldering (cute) romance with sexy (cute) cyborgs, I say that there is nothing (Everything) wrong with being turned on by shiny (fuzzy) household (spaceship) appliances (sextoy).

Srly.

maxmordon
10-15-2008, 11:57 AM
Arriving at L. Ron Hoover's modernistic office / cathedral / ware-house /
condominium complex, Joe is greeted by a pre-recorded message and
a dramatically illuminated image on a wall-sized TV screen...

L. RON HOOVER:
Welcome to the First Church of Appliantology!
The WHITE ZONE is for loading and unloading only!

Don't you be
Tarot-fied
It's just a token of my extreme
Don't you be
Tarot-fied
It's just a token of my extreme
Don't you never try to look behind my eyes
You don t wanna know what they have seen
Don't you never try to look behind my eyes
You don't wanna know what they have seen

JOE: (thinking to himself)
Some people think
That if they go too far
They'll never get hack
To where the rest of them are
I might be crazy
But there's one thing I know
You might be surprised
At what you find when ya go!

And thus, having rationalized his expedition to L. Ron's modernistic office /
cathedral / warehouse / condominium complex, JOE seeks The Answer to
his problem...

JOE:
Oh oh oh
Mystical Advisor
What is my problem, tell me
Can you see?

L. RON HOOVER:
Well, you have nothing to fear, my son!
You are a Latent Appliance Fetishist, It appears to me!

JOE:
That all seems very, very strange
I never craved a toaster
Or a color T. V.

L. RON HOOVER:
A Latent Appliance Fetishist
Is a person who refuses to admit to his or herself
That sexual gratification can only be achieved
Through the use of MACHINES... Get the picture?

JOE:
Are you telling me
I should come out of the closet now Mr. Ron?

L. RON HOOVER:
No, my son!
You must go into THE CLOSET
And you will have
A lot of fun!
That's where they all live
So if you want an
Appliance to love you
You'll have to go in there
N' get you one

JOE:
Well...that seems simple enough...

L. RON HOOVER:
Yes, but if you want a really GOOD one,
You'll have to learn a foreign language...

JOE:
German, for instance?

L. RON HOOVER:
That's right...
A lot of really cute ones come from over there!
(Fifty bucks, please)

And a cheerful group of Appliantologists dance into the room wearing
aluminum foil lab smocks, lock arms in a circle around JOE, making
sure he pays in full, all the while singing with L. RON as he delivers
nis final instructions...

L. RON HOOVER:
If you been
Mod-O-fied,
It's an illusion,
an yer in between
Don't you be
Tarot-fied,
It's just a lot of nothin,'
So what can it mean?
If you been
Mod-O-fied,
It's an illusion,
an yer in between
Don't you be
Tarot-fied,
It's just a lot of nothin,
So what can it mean?
(etc., etc., etc.)

JOE leaves the First Church of Appliantology and sets out to try L. RON s expensive advice

Zoombie
10-15-2008, 11:57 AM
...Max has more time than me.

And doubtlessly, far more pants.

I am afraid I am 3 times too sleepy to post on this thread. Fundamental.

NeuroFizz
10-15-2008, 03:55 PM
I find all but one of the photos both erotic and in good taste. The one exception is the popper. Ejaculatory "money shots" are not appropriate for this forum, particularly since young 'uns come around here. (and please don't make that last phrase an inappropriate pun).

rhymegirl
10-15-2008, 04:05 PM
Shocking! Extremely shocking.

Especially when the electrical cord gets wet.

Pagey's_Girl
10-15-2008, 04:14 PM
That's where my rotisserie is! The---the---TRAMP!

BenPanced
10-15-2008, 07:12 PM
Wow. I've managed to break up two better homes and gardens.

Go, me.

regdog
10-15-2008, 07:22 PM
:Jaw:

Williebee
10-15-2008, 07:27 PM
L. Ron Hoover? :)

Could have been Ron Popeil. (http://www.ronco.com/index.aspx)

Phoebe H
10-15-2008, 07:34 PM
Is it wrong if I actually am slightly turned on by shiny new household appliances?

No, that may just be a touch of mechaphilia (http://carloving.blogspot.com/).

Mela
10-15-2008, 07:39 PM
The Sunbeam MIXMASTER. I love it. So in control.

Pagey's_Girl
10-15-2008, 07:42 PM
Wow. I've managed to break up two better homes and gardens.

Go, me.

I always had my suspicions about that rotisserie. Coming home at three AM with lamb on its breath. I never eat lamb...

regdog
10-15-2008, 09:11 PM
I always had my suspicions about that rotisserie. Coming home at three AM with lamb on its breath. I never eat lamb...


There there **pats Pagey's Girl's back** Just forget about that two timing rotisserie, you can do much better.

NeuroFizz
10-15-2008, 09:18 PM
Nekkid caffeine
http://i246.photobucket.com/albums/gg81/NeuroFizz/gaggia_1987_1796218.gif

JoNightshade
10-15-2008, 09:18 PM
No, that may just be a touch of mechaphilia (http://carloving.blogspot.com/).

:Jaw: I am officially out of this thread. FOREVER! ::Jo starts running::

BenPanced
10-15-2008, 09:30 PM
Nekkid caffeine
http://i246.photobucket.com/albums/gg81/NeuroFizz/gaggia_1987_1796218.gif
Oooh! Keep posting pictures like that and we're going to have to port this thread over to Hardcore!

*fans self*

Pagey's_Girl
10-15-2008, 09:31 PM
Caffeine.... *swoons*

shyne
10-15-2008, 09:44 PM
Is teatime the new "bootycall"?

Cranky
10-15-2008, 09:57 PM
Nekkid caffeine
http://i246.photobucket.com/albums/gg81/NeuroFizz/gaggia_1987_1796218.gif

This is mine. Coffe pr0n. Gotta love it. :D

http://s158.photobucket.com/albums/t115/jpayne75/th_krupsonline_2016_361831.gif

benbradley
10-15-2008, 10:59 PM
The whole house is full of sexually active ... uh ...

http://furnitureporn.com/

shyne
10-15-2008, 11:03 PM
I find all but one of the photos both erotic and in good taste. The one exception is the popper. Ejaculatory "money shots" are not appropriate for this forum, particularly since young 'uns come around here. (and please don't make that last phrase an inappropriate pun).

You got that right on the money