Is it ever okay to lie?
If I were to answer that before today, it would be a resounding "NO". I just don’t like the idea of it. I don’t even fib. But, I told a whopper today. And I am just sick about it, but not sure I was wrong, or right. I am a tad shocked and may not be making sense. If not, sorry.
Story:
I was on my way to visit a friend who lives in another city over an hour away from me (I had the day off). Beyond that, I do not want to be too specific in case someone here has friends or relatives within a 100-mile radius of me and has not heard or wishes for their family/friend’s family business stay private (if it applies to them). I do not wish to inflict painful things on another. And the specifics have no bearing on the lie I told. It will not be on the news, so why air such stuff is what I figure.
I held the hand of a teenabge boy who died today. I was by his side taking pulse, respirations, etc. to relay to 911. He was in and out of it and rambling/mumbling. He called me mom (it was a public place and he was alone except for the bystanders trying to assist while waiting for an ambulance) and whispered sorry over and over. "Mom, sorry, sorry…mom." He was in a bad way, and I really did think he was not going to make it. I did not want this child to die thinking he was unloved and unforgiven. He was so, I don’t know - small (not in size, but spirit maybe – or just because I flashed to my son when he was a babe and was I dying to get back to him and hug him right then). He was just so pitiful in his worry that it broke my heart and I could not watch him in his fear of no forgiveness.
The lie I told: "Honey, don’t worry. It is okay. I love you and always will. We will get through it."
He did not die right there. He was DOA at the hospital. The policeman who came to the scene called me at my friends to deliver the news since I had to give a statement and I had talked to 911. Or, for whatever. Maybe because I was shook up and he did not want me to wonder all my life. I don’t know. But, he called to let me know the boy died on the ride to the hospital.
Now, I am sick about this.
I think, maybe I did something nice by easing his fears of dying with his mom upset at him. Had he lived, he would not remember me at all I do not believe.
On the flip side, if I had not said the words, would he have tried to hang on and maybe made it? Willpower is a mighty thing and can overcome much. I have seen people who seemed like they would die a day or two earlier, but they kept waiting and hanging on until their loved ones made it to their side before passing. (I KNOW this does not happen tons, but it DOES happen.)
God, I hope his mom is not upset I did that. I think I am gonna barf again.
Was the lie I told acceptable or not?
If I were to answer that before today, it would be a resounding "NO". I just don’t like the idea of it. I don’t even fib. But, I told a whopper today. And I am just sick about it, but not sure I was wrong, or right. I am a tad shocked and may not be making sense. If not, sorry.
Story:
I was on my way to visit a friend who lives in another city over an hour away from me (I had the day off). Beyond that, I do not want to be too specific in case someone here has friends or relatives within a 100-mile radius of me and has not heard or wishes for their family/friend’s family business stay private (if it applies to them). I do not wish to inflict painful things on another. And the specifics have no bearing on the lie I told. It will not be on the news, so why air such stuff is what I figure.
I held the hand of a teenabge boy who died today. I was by his side taking pulse, respirations, etc. to relay to 911. He was in and out of it and rambling/mumbling. He called me mom (it was a public place and he was alone except for the bystanders trying to assist while waiting for an ambulance) and whispered sorry over and over. "Mom, sorry, sorry…mom." He was in a bad way, and I really did think he was not going to make it. I did not want this child to die thinking he was unloved and unforgiven. He was so, I don’t know - small (not in size, but spirit maybe – or just because I flashed to my son when he was a babe and was I dying to get back to him and hug him right then). He was just so pitiful in his worry that it broke my heart and I could not watch him in his fear of no forgiveness.
The lie I told: "Honey, don’t worry. It is okay. I love you and always will. We will get through it."
He did not die right there. He was DOA at the hospital. The policeman who came to the scene called me at my friends to deliver the news since I had to give a statement and I had talked to 911. Or, for whatever. Maybe because I was shook up and he did not want me to wonder all my life. I don’t know. But, he called to let me know the boy died on the ride to the hospital.
Now, I am sick about this.
I think, maybe I did something nice by easing his fears of dying with his mom upset at him. Had he lived, he would not remember me at all I do not believe.
On the flip side, if I had not said the words, would he have tried to hang on and maybe made it? Willpower is a mighty thing and can overcome much. I have seen people who seemed like they would die a day or two earlier, but they kept waiting and hanging on until their loved ones made it to their side before passing. (I KNOW this does not happen tons, but it DOES happen.)
God, I hope his mom is not upset I did that. I think I am gonna barf again.
Was the lie I told acceptable or not?
