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Joe270
07-08-2008, 10:19 AM
Help! I know this isn't the best for Office Party, but there's more people in here right now, and I'm in a bit of a rush. The paper gets submitted tomorrow morning.

What's the best way to write this sentence:

'This was a collaborative effort between Dr. Jones, other faculty, and myself.'

Or:

'This was a collaborative effort between Dr. Jones, other faculty, and me.'



Thanks for your assistance!

poetinahat
07-08-2008, 10:29 AM
'me'

or

'I collaborated in this effort with Dr. Jones and other faculty'

Just my 0.02 + GST

Angelinity
07-08-2008, 10:31 AM
um. how about...

'This was a collaborative effort with Dr. Jones and other faculty.'

or...

"My gratitude/thanks... to Dr Jones and all other faculty members for their collaboration...'

...

Joe270
07-08-2008, 10:36 AM
I don't think I can change that much of it. Obviously, it's not my paper. Yeah, right, me collaborating with faculty and Doctors. The world would stop spinning.

I figured it was gonna be 'me', but I need to be as sure as possible. I've googled it, but all the examples seem to go both ways in this instance.

I could change it to:

...A collaborative effort between myself, Dr. Jones, and other faculty members.

Or:

...A collaborative effort between me, Dr. Jones, and other faculty members.

kct webber
07-08-2008, 10:40 AM
Me

Joe270
07-08-2008, 10:48 AM
Okay, I'm going with 'me'.

If I get this wrong, I could get a gawdawful anal probe. Damn Doctors.

Hey, wait a minute, you guys aren't steering me wrong just to laugh your asses off at my expense, are ya?

kristie911
07-08-2008, 10:49 AM
I like "myself" better. Don't know why but it sounds better.

Sorry.

Joe270
07-08-2008, 10:50 AM
Dammit.

kristie911
07-08-2008, 10:51 AM
:Hug2:

Do you want me to delete my post? Will that make it easier?

Joe270
07-08-2008, 10:54 AM
No. Just send me some non-latex exam gloves and a large jar of vaseline.

You are 911, after all, Kristie.

kristie911
07-08-2008, 11:03 AM
No. Just send me some non-latex exam gloves and a large jar of vaseline.


As long as you're not expecting me to be the one wearing the gloves...

:tongue

Joe270
07-08-2008, 11:10 AM
Everything's cool.

I went with Poetinafedora's suggestion:

'I collaborated with Dr. Jones. . ."

Mostly because Proctologists scare me.

Writing, it's not just a job, it's an adventure in unwanted medical procedures if you aren't darned careful with your proofreading.

JJ Cooper
07-08-2008, 11:16 AM
Dr Jones and other faculty provided some (limited) information and overall it's my paper.

That help? What? Too late?

JJ

Joe270
07-08-2008, 11:21 AM
Thanks, JJ, I'll take any help I can get in what is quickly becoming the world's most public and humiliating case of 'cover your ass' in history.

JJ Cooper
07-08-2008, 11:27 AM
As long as you don't go with my suggestion, you should be right.

JJ

SpookyWriter
07-08-2008, 11:34 AM
As long as you don't go with my suggestion, you should be right.

JJAw, are we sheepish with our words. :D

JJ Cooper
07-08-2008, 11:37 AM
Just making sure my attempt at humour was read as such. Gotta use those emoticons more often.

JJ

Joe270
07-08-2008, 11:43 AM
:e2heartbe:e2moon:

ErylRavenwell
07-08-2008, 12:50 PM
Me! "Myself" only when the subject is "I".

oswann
07-08-2008, 08:03 PM
In the future just say it was you. Screw Dr. Jones and the other faculty, I say.


Os.

melaniehoo
07-08-2008, 08:05 PM
I vote 'me.' Good luck. :D

And why does the word sheepish make me giggle?

Pat~
07-08-2008, 08:13 PM
Ah, too late. But since I'm here, I'll offer that I like Poet's and Angelinity's versions. :) Poet's gets rid of the passive writing, and Angelinity's gets rid of the pronoun altogether.

Inky
07-08-2008, 08:14 PM
No. Just send me some non-latex exam gloves and a large jar of vaseline.

You are 911, after all, Kristie.

:e2brows:
You KNOW if there's a freaky thread in existence, my radar starts buzzing....*starts twitching*
Huh...apparently, another just posted...*dashes out of thread*

Joe270
07-08-2008, 08:23 PM
Poet's gets rid of the passive writing

I went with Poetinaderby's suggestion because it had the active advantage as well.

One of the things I did first was switch it to active voice, and get rid of repetitive use of certain words, like 'facilitate'. Everything was facilitated, for cryin' out loud. But I left some lines in passive because that way highlighted a particular task or goal. But, in the end, it solved two problems by going with active voice.

Plus the liberal scatterings of 'due to the fact thats' were cut.

No matter what, it's loads better than it was.

Thanks for the help, everyone.

Medievalist
07-08-2008, 08:36 PM
Everything's cool.

I went with Poetinafedora's suggestion:

'I collaborated with Dr. Jones. . ."

Mostly because Proctologists scare me.

Writing, it's not just a job, it's an adventure in unwanted medical procedures if you aren't darned careful with your proofreading.

Yes!

Poet is absolutely right. This is the best way.

SpookyWriter
07-08-2008, 11:38 PM
Yes!

Poet is absolutely right. This is the best way.Although we don't really know if the rest of the passages are written in third person omni.

POV is important. Right?

Which would make the sentence a little awkward.

But Joe would never do that to us. Would he?

Gravity
07-09-2008, 12:28 AM
How about,"me and a buncha college-boy eggheads..." Too earthy, perhaps...?

Joe270
07-09-2008, 04:42 AM
But Joe would never do that to us. Would he?

I didn't write it, a doctor did. I seriously doubt they know about 3rd person omni. Sorry, NFizz, you are the exception, from what I can see.

I have my hands full just keeping paragraphs in either present or past tense, tenses change with every sentence.

Also, every one of these professional papers start with the line 'first and foremost'. Jeez. I'm really starting to hate that line.

But I've established a little cottage industry by reviewing these things, so I can't really bitch.