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View Full Version : Excuses for PA management



DaveKuzminski
04-16-2005, 06:48 AM
Lately, PA's management has found themselves up against a writer who knows his rights. Now they need excuses for why they shorted his royalties. Since PA's management is creatively challenged (also known as stipid), it behooves us to be nice and help them with some creative excuses they can use when the police show up.

Just to help things along, here's one. They could always claim that some of the receipts were lost during the fire drill at the convention. ;)

Savannah Blue
04-16-2005, 06:54 AM
Willem ate them.

:ROFL: :roll:

WhisperingBard
04-16-2005, 08:42 AM
"Willem's a foreigner. He can't count in English."

"Nobody told us we couldn't keep *all* the money!"

"We gave the money to charity: the Zobmi International Relief Fund."

CACTUSWENDY
04-16-2005, 09:20 AM
:crazy: They have a convention? Cool...:Wha:

lucyishome
04-16-2005, 09:47 AM
I'd like to plead the 5th.


:hi:

Anne

reph
04-16-2005, 10:28 AM
We can exspline.

Sher2
04-16-2005, 04:18 PM
One of the former general partners ran it through the spell-checker and this is how it came out.

Cool thread!

Richard
04-16-2005, 04:25 PM
"Ah did not have a publishing relationship with that woman."
"Psst...it's a guy."

aspier
04-16-2005, 04:45 PM
Royalties? Prince Charles? I knew he couldn't be trusted!!!! You should see his taste in architecture! That' says it all doesn't it!

Sher2
04-16-2005, 06:10 PM
"Excuses? What excuses? You are so nonsensical.

"And what are those little puncture marks on your neck?

"Watch the shiny, cracked spline, now. You are getting veeeeeery sleepy, ja, Liebling?"

James D. Macdonald
04-16-2005, 07:05 PM
Don't take that tone with us. Your claim that businesses keep records is so laughable that it is child's play to refute it. We won't waste our junior staffers' time on your nonsense.

bluwinteryfox
04-16-2005, 07:07 PM
Letters, you wrote us letters. What letters? We never received them, and if we did, we'll deny it because we told you in our last email only to reply to us via email.

Richard
04-16-2005, 07:12 PM
"Our lawyers are swarming all over the airport! I will take you to see them! In one hour! You PublishAmerican infidels will cower before Saddam! We will throw our shoes at you! Goodnight!"

Sher2
04-16-2005, 07:28 PM
"Willem's a foreigner. He can't count in English."

"Nobody told us we couldn't keep *all* the money!"

"We gave the money to charity: the Zobmi International Relief Fund."
I hereby nominate Bard to spearhead the planning committee to bring us ... the Concert for Zobmi Aid.

SeanDSchaffer
04-17-2005, 01:53 AM
"Tell 'em you were drunk when you [wrote] the contract!" -- Ed Norton

:faint:

ChunkyC
04-17-2005, 01:57 AM
"One of our editors edited the books by mistake."

Lisa Y
04-17-2005, 04:15 AM
What you are claiming is totally, factually, and ,completely untrue. We have 11,000 authors who are happy with they're royalty checks. You can prove this to yourself by checking our message board and our facts and figures page. And besides, even unknown authors who publish with big houses like Random House don't get big royalty checks. Didn't you read you're contract?

We will not answer anymore of you're future e-mails or letters until we receive a sincere apology from you.

lizziepants
04-17-2005, 05:26 AM
Thanks to the enthusiasm of authors such as yourself, an average 67 new writers ask us each day if they can join your ranks. They have heard about you, your book, your fellow authors, or your publisher through bookstores, newspapers, magazines, the internet, or through simple word of mouth. Imagine: that is more than 16,000 writers per year. This makes PublishAmerica by far the number one traditional publisher in terms of manuscripts submitted. And since the vast majority of all submitted works never make it through the full acceptance process, it makes you a member of one of the most envied crowds in the publishing world.

/email quote

"This makes PublishAmerica by far the number one traditional publisher in terms of manuscripts submitted."

Oh, hmm, I'm sorry, but I tend to measure the success of a publisher by how much MONEY they make their AUTHORS. Golly!

lizziepants
04-17-2005, 05:30 AM
Here's another one of my favorites:

Dear author,

They sure know where to join a quality crowd!

Although it is not unusual for PublishAmerica authors to have other traditional publishing houses requesting to contract their next book, it is just as common for authors from other well-established houses to come and join PublishAmerica.

Today we are welcoming the following authors in your midst:
*Novelist James W. Bennett came from Simon and Schuster with "Harvey Potter Does Dallas". Mr. Bennett was also published by Scholastic, of Harry Potter fame.
*Richard C. Mears joins us from Simon and Schuster as well. PublishAmerica recently released his book "Anubis Rex".
*Yolanda Smith comes to us from Random House. PublishAmerica will soon release her book "Worry Free Retirement Living".
*And two weeks ago, we also reached an agreement with a top award winning, world-renowned author, who will come to us from Harper Collins. We expect the contract to be signed this week, and an announcement to be made soon.

All this is happening at a time when more authors than ever are joining your ranks. To us, this is plain astonishing and amazing. Just a little over four years ago we built PublishAmerica with hopes to create opportunities for new authors. We figured we'd consider ourselves very lucky if we could help up to, who knows, maybe a thousand authors. How wrong we were. Today, almost seven thousand (7000!) authors call PublishAmerica home. Some are new, others are seasoned, some are relatively unknown, others are celebrities.

With so many new books and so much talent to choose from, we are currently offering gift and specialty stores a special volume discount schedule, and, as always, we are extending the same special discount also to our own authors:

50-99 copies: 40 pct discount
100-149 copies: 45 pct discount
150-249 copies: 50 pct discount
250+ copies: 55 pct discount

This offer expires April 15, phone orders only. Please call us at 301 695 1707.
Thank you!



We should play.. count the lies/idiocy/grammatical errors. :)

Sher2
04-17-2005, 06:57 PM
Shemp did it.

Sepisllib
07-27-2009, 02:53 PM
Like so many others I was desiring to publish my books and took the opportunity to jump on PublishAmerica's band wagon.

I failed to check out the company very well and "assumed" they were a well organized, respected and traditional publisher.

Boy was I wrong. Now I have a book that I cannot just "rewrite" and submit to another publisher anywhere as it would violate my contract with PA. The really sad part to me is that (I am biased of course), I feel my book has real possibilities that will never be able to live up to it's potential.

A friend in Shreveport went to Boarders to buy my book and they did not have it. She went to books a million and they told her they could not get it.

What is the real point of publishing books if they are not distributed for sale in bookstores????

Well - my book, "Golden Grass" will likely die a premature death because of what PA is not doing - I cannot even manage to obtain book signing dates with anyone....

Just venting ------ and I shall take my efforts elsewhere.

God Bless

Bill

darkprincealain
07-27-2009, 04:26 PM
Best thing to do is write a new and better book, do a lot of research on agents and publishers, decide what your goal is for your new book, and submit your new manuscript to reputable folks.

You may decide to try to get your rights back to your PA book. There are other threads here in the PA forum that show how that can be done, though success has been mixed. Only you can decide if it's worth the trouble, since the first publishing rights have been used.

One thing to note. Miranda of PA lurks here, and that you made a post here may not work in your favor with getting your rights back. If you're going to go that route, I'd recommend blanking the title of your book, since she can use that to identify you. Maybe that's playing it a little too close to the vest, but from what you can read about her elsewhere on the web, I'd say better safe than sorry.

Link to more on Miranda--not all of it has to do with PA, per se. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miranda_Prather)

M.R.J. Le Blanc
07-27-2009, 06:24 PM
Like so many others I was desiring to publish my books and took the opportunity to jump on PublishAmerica's band wagon.

I failed to check out the company very well and "assumed" they were a well organized, respected and traditional publisher.

Boy was I wrong. Now I have a book that I cannot just "rewrite" and submit to another publisher anywhere as it would violate my contract with PA. The really sad part to me is that (I am biased of course), I feel my book has real possibilities that will never be able to live up to it's potential.

A friend in Shreveport went to Boarders to buy my book and they did not have it. She went to books a million and they told her they could not get it.

What is the real point of publishing books if they are not distributed for sale in bookstores????

Well - my book, "Golden Grass" will likely die a premature death because of what PA is not doing - I cannot even manage to obtain book signing dates with anyone....

Just venting ------ and I shall take my efforts elsewhere.

God Bless

Bill

Take heart; a lot of first completed books (if this is your first, if it isn't I apologize for the assumption) end up as trunk novels - meaning they're just not meant/ready to be published. Sometimes it's your second or third book that ends up getting the ball rolling, and sometime later down the road of your career it may be possible to bring back that trunk novel. darkprincealain is right, work on a new and better book. Maybe by the time the seven year rights-grab is over, you'll be able to revisit it, improve it and also give it another shot. If you've got one great story in you, there's sure to be more buried in there. Don't give up.

And stick around. There's a lot of good stuff on this forum.

Marian Perera
07-27-2009, 06:45 PM
Well - my book, "Golden Grass" will likely die a premature death because of what PA is not doing - I cannot even manage to obtain book signing dates with anyone....

Hi Bill,

I checked your book out on Amazon (http://www.amazon.com/Golden-Grass-Bill-W-Trammell/dp/1607499762/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1248704909&sr=1-1) and it may also be crippled because of what PA has done.

For instance, the synopsis on Amazon suggests a Bridges of Madison County-esque love story, but the picture of the windmill on the cover doesn't suggest the same thing. In fact, coupled with the title, I would have taken this to be something nonfictional about agriculture (the cover is also a stock image, 24488419 on Jupiter Images).

Then again, PA isn't about selling to casual browsers in bookstores, it's about selling to authors and from them to the pocket markets of an author's family and friends.

Sorry you had to go through this, and feel free to vent at any time.

BenPanced
07-27-2009, 07:09 PM
The dog ate your royalty statement. :)

Cyia
07-27-2009, 10:07 PM
Hi Bill,

I checked your book out on Amazon (http://www.amazon.com/Golden-Grass-Bill-W-Trammell/dp/1607499762/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1248704909&sr=1-1) and it may also be crippled because of what PA has done.

For instance, the synopsis on Amazon suggests a Bridges of Madison County-esque love story, but the picture of the windmill on the cover doesn't suggest the same thing. In fact, coupled with the title, I would have taken this to be something nonfictional about agriculture (the cover is also a stock image, 24488419 on Jupiter Images).

Then again, PA isn't about selling to casual browsers in bookstores, it's about selling to authors and from them to the pocket markets of an author's family and friends.

Sorry you had to go through this, and feel free to vent at any time.

Not only that, but almost $17 for a 73-page book is ridiculous. Full sized hardback novels cost less than that at Wal-Mart, where I wouldn't have to pay extra for shipping.

merrihiatt
07-28-2009, 02:48 AM
Hi Bill and welcome to AW.:welcome: I'm glad you found the site, although I don't like the reason that you found it.

I signed with PA in the fall of 2008 and quickly had my eyes opened to their business model. I thought I knew what PublishAmerica was all about, but I did not. It is a mistake I won't make again. I believe you can get past the pain and hurt that PA doles out so easily and move on to writing another book. Please don't let this setback stop you from writing.

Again, I'm glad you found AW and check out other parts of the site. We're here if you need to vent again and we want to offer our support during your time of discernment.

Gillhoughly
07-28-2009, 04:00 AM
Welcome to AW Sepislli! :welcome:

I'm sorry that it was PA that got you here, but you're with sympathetic friends.

As has been said, you dust yourself off and write a new and better book, and shop it to publishers who have books in the stores. You look for similar books, then get the websites from inside the front pages. That will steer you clear of the ripoff sites, since they won't have books in stores.

RESIST the urge to buy copies of your own book from PA and ride this out for a bit.

You may be able to get out of your contract early by telling them that there have been no sales and you don't plan to write any more books or ever buy any. Be polite, but let them know they can't make money out of you. They want writers sending them money, and won't bother with "deadbeats!"

DON'T let them know your real name here on AW. They have lurkers here to keep an eye on things, and the person in charge of releasing people from their contracts is-um-"difficult (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miranda_Prather)." She has been known to mess with people just to spread the misery, but you don't give her ammo by getting mad.

Removing your book title from your posts can only do you some good. Just hit the edit button and ask the others who commented on your book to blank out all identification.

By staying off PA's "trouble maker" radar, you may be able to get out of your contract early, in just a year or so, not seven years, so don't give up!

Please do stick around AW and check out all the forums. This is a good place with good people! http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/icons/icon10.gif

CatSlave
07-28-2009, 04:09 AM
"We gave the money to charity: the Zobmi International Relief Fund."

I suspect that this is very close to the truth.

NykeYoung
07-28-2009, 07:50 AM
"We've got to pay the Mob somehow."

"We had to use the money otherwise, but we'll get it back. We've got five billion coming. We just need to open an account and give the information to a prince in Nigeria."

"I'm sorry, but we bet it all on red."

benbradley
07-28-2009, 07:59 AM
"Willem's a foreigner. He can't count in English."

"Nobody told us we couldn't keep *all* the money!"

"We gave the money to charity: the Zobmi International Relief Fund."
Charity? Wasn't there some Hello-copter thingie? Or was it hell-o-copter?

Alphabeter
07-28-2009, 09:52 AM
Do not take that tone with us or we will cancel our checks.

PA always operated on the highest principles of honor and integrity.

Find that schmoe, H.B. Marcus. He smokes a lot of cigarettes.

MP: My friend Jessica Forrester used the old statements for horse feed. Wanna go to the Derby?

WM: Helicopter trips are deductible for marketing purposes. PA books are available everywhere.

LC: Those books were returned in 2005 to PublishBritannica. Are you hungry?

CatSlave
07-28-2009, 11:58 PM
Charity? Wasn't there some Hello-copter thingie? Or was it hell-o-copter?

Last Thursday, the Hellocopter you refer to crashed outside of Frederick, MD, during severe weather conditions, killing all four persons aboard.

The owners of the helicopter were not on the trip and are unharmed.

See the Hellocopter thread for further discussions, although I suspect the thread will quietly go away of its own accord out of respect for the families affected by this tragic accident.

http://www.fredericknewspost.com/sections/news/display.htm?StoryID=93135

Sepisllib
07-29-2009, 07:54 PM
From reading the huge number of posts on this board it becomes obvious that I am among friends of many and various levels of abilities and competence.

One of my issues is writing. I have a great many stories in me, however when I write it becomes a mudslide. You see - I do not know a noun from a pronoun or how to spell and proper grammar. I have a 10th grade education and failed to pay attention to 9 of those.

On an interesting sidebar - I have two careers behind me and into my 3rd retirement at this time. I have built three corporations from scratch and nothing but pocket change to start and one of those is a multimillion dollar company now.

That said, you would think that I would have the common sense to check things out prior to publishing anything with anyone -----

Regardless of the circumstances I "shall" forge ahead. Now that I have spoken out, to a very low level, against PA I fully expect a full blown attack in return. We will see.

In the meantime ----- thank you all for "listening" and also God Bless

Bill

Gillhoughly
07-29-2009, 08:10 PM
Not to worry, most commercial writing requires a 5th-8th grade level of execution.

:D

Get Strunk and White's ELEMENTS OF STYLE. It's free at the library and cheap at used stores. It will have all you really need to get started. All writers have that book.

Grammar isn't rocket science, and now we all have spell checker. It makes things easier!

Go to the 808 section of your library--which should be your new best friend--and read it. It has tons of books on how to write books and one of them should help with your plotting woes.

Good luck!