Note to the MODS: Please let me know if this is the wrong place for this post. Feel free to move it.
It was until last night I realized what I've done. It may seem that I'm not taking other people's advice or that I'm not serious about my writing. I know you were all frustrated with me and reading my posts seems like a waste of time. I'm really trying to improve my writing. Some of you didn't like my characters, I will admit that it did hurt, but only because I worked so hard on making my characters likeable and all my attempts failed. I believe I know why this was going on.
I'm having some freakish closeness to my main character. She's been in my head for six years, and kept her in there out of fear of being laughed at. I was only 12 when I first wrote that story, and back then Lily wasn't even a main character, she was a villain, just helping the main character for her own goals. I tend to make the same character the same age as me. I make my main characters girls, I don't know why. It was then when I wrote this story, I started to like her a lot.
For six years I've been role playing. And pretending to be my MC. What's life like for her? What's going on inside her head? Trying to be one with the character, was really fun, and made making characterization seem so easy.
I didn't realize until last night that roleplaying has a lot of serious risks. Like a freakish closeness to the character, addiction to feedback that I could never shake off, and a sense of hurt if one person never liked the character or the story. I'm trying to make my writing really cool. I wanted to put the readers at the edge of my seats. I showed a lot of people my writing so they could read it and like it. This roleplaying led to my obsession about the story.
I know why I've been like this. Driving everybody nuts, and I'm very sorry. I didn;t think this would happen. I didn't know why I was seeking everyone's approval, maybe I was afraid of doing something I could regret.
I'm not asking for sympathy or pity, just telling you all how stupid I was. Right now I can't think straight anymore. And because of my mistakes, I don't know if finishing the book is even worth it.
Thank you for listening.
Cindy.
It was until last night I realized what I've done. It may seem that I'm not taking other people's advice or that I'm not serious about my writing. I know you were all frustrated with me and reading my posts seems like a waste of time. I'm really trying to improve my writing. Some of you didn't like my characters, I will admit that it did hurt, but only because I worked so hard on making my characters likeable and all my attempts failed. I believe I know why this was going on.
I'm having some freakish closeness to my main character. She's been in my head for six years, and kept her in there out of fear of being laughed at. I was only 12 when I first wrote that story, and back then Lily wasn't even a main character, she was a villain, just helping the main character for her own goals. I tend to make the same character the same age as me. I make my main characters girls, I don't know why. It was then when I wrote this story, I started to like her a lot.
For six years I've been role playing. And pretending to be my MC. What's life like for her? What's going on inside her head? Trying to be one with the character, was really fun, and made making characterization seem so easy.
I didn't realize until last night that roleplaying has a lot of serious risks. Like a freakish closeness to the character, addiction to feedback that I could never shake off, and a sense of hurt if one person never liked the character or the story. I'm trying to make my writing really cool. I wanted to put the readers at the edge of my seats. I showed a lot of people my writing so they could read it and like it. This roleplaying led to my obsession about the story.
I know why I've been like this. Driving everybody nuts, and I'm very sorry. I didn;t think this would happen. I didn't know why I was seeking everyone's approval, maybe I was afraid of doing something I could regret.
I'm not asking for sympathy or pity, just telling you all how stupid I was. Right now I can't think straight anymore. And because of my mistakes, I don't know if finishing the book is even worth it.
Thank you for listening.
Cindy.