Who Wants to be a Book Millionaire

Whoa! What next???

So, who's sent in for the application?

For the life of me, as soon as I saw this, I was wondering how PublishAmerica was involved. Strange.

Oh...my...God.

Could you imagine if this were actually a real thing? So, like, viewers would watch...what, eight contestants typing on their keyboards?

Oooh, I'm hooked!

Book Millionaire will not be about watching people sit around writing books.

Prokop says, “Books are about fun and business. Ninety-five percent of the success of a book is believing in it, the ability to market it and getting the message out there in front of readers. Five percent of the success is writing. Books still need to be written well. But, this formula shows the importance of having fun promoting books.”

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Where's Uncle Jim?

According to the whois information on the website, that domain is registered to:

Registrant Contact:
Best Seller Publishing, Inc.
Best Seller Publishing ([email protected])
+1.7158681110
Fax: none
PO Box 396
Bruce, 54819
US

THAT gem of a company was discussed in detail here.

This thread needs to be moved to bewares methinks.

yes, where is uncle jim? do give us your input here.

as for me . . .

I applied.

Under a pseudonym (very useful, those hotmail-type addresses).

Will report back.

- Victoria

why won't the world stop disappointing me?

Oh, oh, oh. I can't stand it.

This is from their description of this supposed reality show:

Viewers will be in the Publishing Committee Suite as the actual Publishing Committee decides who is published and who is not. This is true, real life television. If you have ever wondered how to get published or how publishing decisions are made, you will be riveted to your seat when invited behind the closed doors of the publishing world watching authors and their ideas being chosen and rejected.

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Could there be anything more boring than a bunch of publishing people having a meeting?

Viewers will feel the excitement of intense tasks and growing stakes as the doors to publishing success open. The Candidates’ goal is to be the one who is headed to press. Each week one Candidate Author will hear the dreaded words, “The doors to publishing have closed.” With the show climaxing in the final episode when one Candidate Author will hear, “You’re Published!”

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Assuming the person doing the climaxing is capable of speech.

Who can they imagine is dumb enough to buy this crap?

Wait. I take it back.

- Victoria

So, will you go on the show?

William Haskins said:

why won't the world stop disappointing me?

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because the rest of us must taunt you daily

the taunting of bright and interesting people i can handle. this reality show crap is neither.

victoriastrauss said:

Could there be anything more boring than a bunch of publishing people having a meeting?

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I've already written the first episode! I think I'm going to submit it.


INT. OFFICE

PUBLISHER'S OFFICE. A cluttered desk filled with papers, computer, pens. EDITOR 1, a thirty-four year old, tired-looking woman sits at the desk.

Editor 1 picks up manuscript and begins to read. She reads for twenty minutes. She stands up and walks out of room carrying manuscript.

INT BIGGER OFFICE

EDITOR 2, a fifty-something man in suit sits behind cluttered desk, typing at the computer. Editor 1 enters, drops manuscript on desk.

EDITOR 1
You should read this. It's pretty good.

EDITOR 2
Okay. Thanks.​

Editor 1 leaves room. Editor 2 sips coffee, picks up manuscript and reads for ten minutes.

Roll credits.

The End

victoriastrauss said:

Could there be anything more boring than a bunch of publishing people having a meeting?

- Victoria

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Watching grass grow? Paint dry? Paint peel off the wall by itself? Tumbleweeds?

Nope, sorry, those are more interesting. Okay, this sounds like an applicant for the worst reality tv show ever conceptualized.

Somebody actually bought this?


Susan G.

Susan Gable said:

Somebody actually bought this?


Susan G.

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Note, nowhere on their web site does it mention anything about WHO might be televising this. You'd think if this is going to be the "Next Big Television Reality Show" they'd mention the network that was going to be carrying it. That should have been part of the BLUF as we said in the Army.

I'm thinking Cable Access Networks maybe?

(BLUF - Bottom Line Up Front)

they ain't sold sh1t

yeah they're trying to pitch it. i love the stock photos of camera shoots on the site, as if they're already "in production".

"okay, you get behind the camera and you hold this light, and... hmmm, you point and act like you're saying "action!"

makes me want to chop the sixth toe off my foot. for real.

Well, I was really sure that this was going to be some kind of shill for buying a book, or a kit, or some other worthless stuff. But they seem to be serious about the reality show. Within minutes of sending off my pseudonymous request, I got a reply, with an agreement, application, and instructions for accompanying materials, including that all-important videotape.

For the purposes of anyone thinking of entering, the whole package can be distilled down to a couple of excerpts:

8. PRIZES. Game Winner receives: A Publishing Contract. The winner gets to have their book manuscript published and available on Amazon.com and available to bookstores in the United States. Prizes are not transferable and no substitution of prizes is permitted except that Best Seller Publications reserves the right to substitute a prize of equivalent value or greater if a prize is unavailable. All prizes are awarded "AS IS" and WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND...

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Note the key words "available". Three guesses: what kind of Publishing Contract will this be? And what would be of equivalent value? Lessee--iUniverse charges $299 for its basic POD package. Wow! That's some prize!

20. PARTICIPATION. ...You understand if chosen as a Candidate Author, your participation in Program will not be all that you may want or need to do to achieve the ultimate publishing success. You understand and agree the Book MillionaireTM Reality TV Show and its producers, owners, officers, directors, employees, judges, agents, representatives, and affiliates do not warrant any particular level of success from your participation in the Program. You expressly acknowledge that no promises have been made to you, either express or implied, verbal or written, regarding any income you might earn or success you might achieve due to your participation in the Process or Program or any expenses you might earn back, including your travel or other expenses in conjunction with the Application or Participation in Process or Program.

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So...having entered a contest called Book Millionaire which promises to help you learn how to "live the lifestyle of a bestselling author" and transform you into "America's next Best Selling Author and Reality Show TV Celebrity", you now discover that...well...they aren't actually really promising to do those things at all.

Somehow I don't think we're going to see this show on cable anytime soon. But hey, if the show doesn't work out, Best Seller Publications will have a lot of new names on its mailing list, and since every single one of those names is a potential customer, that can't be bad!

- Victoria

Oh, it's better than that. According to the site, you spend a whole two weeks (WOW!) shilling other peoples' books and other merchandise, and don't even need to have a manuscript, an idea for a manuscript or, from the look of it, a pulse to call your own. It's like the Playboy Mansion and the Library of Congress got together, had kids, and made them work in Barnes and Noble for NO PAY!

William Haskins said:

why won't the world stop disappointing me?

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Because you set the expectations too high, Dear.

Viewers will be in the Publishing Committee Suite as the actual Publishing Committee decides who is published and who is not. This is true, real life television. If you have ever wondered how to get published or how publishing decisions are made, you will be riveted to your seat when invited behind the closed doors of the publishing world watching authors and their ideas being chosen and rejected.

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Something EVEN MORE Exciting!

Uncle Jim-That Corn Cam is great and certainly more exciting! I'm bookmarking that one.

Saritams8 said:

Uncle Jim-That Corn Cam is great and certainly more exciting! I'm bookmarking that one.

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me too! What a way to spend your time, watching the serene beauty that is corn growing. Ah....

I want to know how to go about becoming one of the judges, and what it pays.

And if I'm one of the judges can I be snotty and sarcastic about the contestants on the air?