A modest proposal
Asking me to chose a favorite smiley
is like asking me to pick my favorite swear word.
In good faith
, I just can't do it.
I love
them all
—
in their proper application. (Accuracy
. Accuracy
. Accuracy.
)
What I do not like
, what drives me over the edge
—and it seems to be a fetish here,
—is excessively excessive and redundantly redundant
over-use of smilies
,
especially the animated ones.
It's distracting!
It's blight!
And it shant be tollerated!
It's a callous disregard for internet resources and, dare I say, a wanton
and wicked
waste of god's
e2cloud9
own perfectly precious pixels!
Show some restraint, man!
Understatement is the mark of a sensitive
and mature
writer
, and so it should be of message board posters
...
and those who love them
.
Stifle!
I am confident
that upon sober reflection
right thinking AW-ians of every stripe
will join together
in mutual respect
and cooperation
to end this vulgar
, and troubling practice
; and,
further, will work
tirelessly
to educate family
, co-workers
, loved ones :
, and the general public
of a kinder
more effective
and eminently humane
philosophy and practice.
It is time to put away the childish ways of our youth,
e2cookie:
), and embark on a more progressive path
, for the sake of our children
, our nation
, and ourselves
.
The stakes are high.
.
But the rewards are great!
The whole world is watching!
And failure is
not an option.
So make a solemn
pledge today
, to join me
in this most noble of causes.
Let
this, be our
finest hour!
:
Thank you.
Thank you very much.