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View Full Version : Woo hoo! My B&N buddy!



Project nachonaco
06-12-2008, 05:59 AM
So, I'm at B&N yesterday, and I was looking around, I met this cute guy.

We talked for a little while, and he has a lot of the same interests as me (writing, anime, manga, etc). He's in college (23, for perspective I'm 19) and going to college to be an English teacher, or perhaps psychology. I think he's going for both.

He recommended some books (1984, a couple of other fantasy books) and actually recommened one I was going to get! How funny is that!

He read me some Edgar Allen Poe, which I thought was very sweet. I love being read to and just the other day I thought how nice it would be if someone would read to me again.

My parents gave me a little flak ('don't leave with him', which I wasn't going to do anyway), but now they seem to tease me about him. :D

Heh, it was kinda funny. He heard me say 'I'm not' when talkin' to my mom on the phone, and he was like "don't worry, I understand."

This led to a discussion about this day and age where you can't be too careful, which I agree to, ya know, 'cos some dudes are crazy.

We exchanged emails (I'm not ready for phone yet and neither is he), and he has also offered to crit some of my stuff.

(He also said that if he DID want a girlfriend, he would definitely take it slow)

So he's been emailing me while he's on his break (I just met him the other day), the first was just a 'hey how ya doin', so I replied to him with "good, hey, we ought to meet up at B&N again." etc...

Oh, here's the best part: My dad works at a university, so he checked the guy's transcript. LOL.

So, what do you think? Should I ask him to hang out with me Tuesday? well, technically I already did.

So, I guess my poll question is: am I going all the wrong way about this? Does the guy seem good to you guys? I ahve to admit I am NOT a good judge sometimes with guys....But I do feel comfortable around him. I mean, how bad can a guy that goes to B&N be?

MattW
06-12-2008, 06:42 AM
Confusion, jitters, and awkwardness are all good signs.

Have fun, be safe.

Project nachonaco
06-12-2008, 06:46 AM
I will.

We are beginning outside communication with email instead of phone for now.

Should I be overly concerned about the age difference?

(I think the clincher for me was that he picked out a book that I had come on that very day intending to get. Is that a sign?)

Matera the Mad
06-12-2008, 06:47 AM
want a line-by-line on that? :D


Make sure you're on the same page, and don't be in a hurry to submit a full :roll:

Joycecwilliams
06-12-2008, 06:50 AM
Sounds like a nice guy.. I don't think 4 years is a big difference.. Men are immature anyway. :)

I've dated men 20 years older than me and 14 years younger... I don't think age matters it's the people.

maggieuc
06-12-2008, 06:51 AM
I mean, how bad can a guy that goes to B&N be?

First I want to say that he sounds nice, second I want to say that your last sentence made me crack up! I worked at Barnes and Noble for five years, and I could tell you some stories about the people who shop there. I'd say it's about 50% crazy people (and I mean CRAZY!) and 50% normal people who love books. Don't ever think that a guy is okay just because he goes to the bookstore. I'm going to give you an example: we literally had to put up a sign in the men's restroom saying that we would not hesitate to call the police if you were caught acting inappropriately (i.e. meeting up to have sex). I know it sounds unbelievable, but it's true!

Project nachonaco
06-12-2008, 06:54 AM
Oh lord. :eek:

Well, I meant to say that I would have expected him to knock me unconscious and force me into his car or something.

But I get good vibes with him. Especially since he recommended a book I ended up getting (it was 'The Lovely Bones').

MsK
06-12-2008, 06:59 AM
I think your handling it great and the guy sounds very interesting. Enjoy yourself and be safe.

Chumplet
06-12-2008, 07:13 AM
If your dad checked him out, I think it's safe to proceed. For the time being, meet in public places or while with friends. That's all I can think of. My daughter is nineteen and she'll be starting college this fall. She'll likely meet young men who are interested in Animation like her. So far I haven't been forced to check out my kids' love interests because they're such cute little nerds they didn't like anyone in high school, but it'll be soon. I wonder if I'll be ready.

Project nachonaco
06-12-2008, 07:26 AM
Yeah, I figure after about five or six more meetings, we should be safe to move on to the next step, right?

benbradley
06-12-2008, 08:22 AM
First I want to say that he sounds nice, second I want to say that your last sentence made me crack up! I worked at Barnes and Noble for five years, and I could tell you some stories about the people who shop there. I'd say it's about 50% crazy people (and I mean CRAZY!) and 50% normal people who love books. Don't ever think that a guy is okay just because he goes to the bookstore. I'm going to give you an example: we literally had to put up a sign in the men's restroom saying that we would not hesitate to call the police if you were caught acting inappropriately (i.e. meeting up to have sex). I know it sounds unbelievable, but it's true!
I'm guessing the people who would do that generally don't buy or read books (unless they have pictures) ... hey, this wasn't a congressman, was it?

Well, worst case, Nacho's guy is at least a literate wacko. Remember the Unabomber wasn't just literate, he had been a college professor...

Oh lord. :eek:

Well, I meant to say that I would have expected him to knock me unconscious and force me into his car or something.

But I get good vibes with him. Especially since he recommended a book I ended up getting (it was 'The Lovely Bones').
That's a hugely popular book (or it was about five years ago), so a LOT of people have read it and might recommend it...I don't think I'd base much just on his suggesting you read that book.

But, whatever...

Project nachonaco
06-12-2008, 08:27 AM
Well, I'd intended to buy the book, heh. ;) That's why I went to the bookstoer, I just hadn't gotten around to getting it at that point.

Joycecwilliams
06-12-2008, 09:48 AM
Oh lord. :eek:

Well, I meant to say that I would have expected him to knock me unconscious and force me into his car or something.

But I get good vibes with him. Especially since he recommended a book I ended up getting (it was 'The Lovely Bones').

Lovely Bones?

that's a weird title for a recommendation.. what is it about?

Joe270
06-12-2008, 10:22 AM
Sounds like a nice guy.. I don't think 4 years is a big difference.. Men are immature anyway.

Joyce is right, men are immature anyway. I'm 50 and I still think I'm 20.

My wife and I are six years apart, and she was a year younger than you when we met. Today is our twentieth anniversary, and we lived together for over seven years before we got married.

Be cautious, sure.

Maybe you've both found your 'soul mates'. Best of luck to you.

MattW
06-12-2008, 03:01 PM
When I was bookstore guy's age, I dated a girl almost 5 years younger. As we were both in college at the time (me being slow), it wasn't strange. Age only really matters when you are in seriously different stages of life - many relationships die when the older one moves on to college or first job.

JimmyB27
06-12-2008, 04:00 PM
Should I be overly concerned about the age difference?

There's nine and a half years between my parents. The girl in question in this thread (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=104748) is six and a half years younger than me. Apparently I have inherited my father's prediliction for the younger woman. ;)

So, no, I don't think you need be concerned. :)

C.bronco
06-12-2008, 05:07 PM
:)
Good for you, Nacho.

Project nachonaco
06-13-2008, 07:46 AM
All set for a second B&N meeting. :D

JoNightshade
06-13-2008, 07:51 AM
Be safe! Have fun! :)

Siddow
06-13-2008, 04:25 PM
Lovely Bones?

that's a weird title for a recommendation.. what is it about?

LOL, seriously? It's about a girl who is murdered and cut into pieces by a neighbor, told posthumously.

Have fun, Nacho. Trust instincts. Don't go through life suspecting everyone of being a whacko, even if they do recommend books about murdered girls to you. :D

pconsidine
06-13-2008, 06:01 PM
I mean, how bad can a guy that goes to B&N be?My ex used to work at B&N in high school and she used to tell a story about this one guy who used to spend an awful lot of time over in the magazine section, but just on the edge of her eyesight. She knew he was there, but not what he was doing. One night, she went over to shoo him out so she could close, but as soon as she rounded the corner, he ran off. She picked up the magazine that he had dropped and found that it was a copy of Playboy in which he had actually licked the ink from various parts of the centerfold.

On a more relevant note, you and he are exactly the same ages that we were when we met and we were together for 13 years. I'm not sure if that's a pro or a con to you, but there you have it.

Soccer Mom
06-13-2008, 07:18 PM
Be safe and have fun. At least you know right off the bat that you have things in common.

maggieuc
06-13-2008, 07:26 PM
My ex used to work at B&N in high school and she used to tell a story about this one guy who used to spend an awful lot of time over in the magazine section, but just on the edge of her eyesight. She knew he was there, but not what he was doing. One night, she went over to shoo him out so she could close, but as soon as she rounded the corner, he ran off. She picked up the magazine that he had dropped and found that it was a copy of Playboy in which he had actually licked the ink from various parts of the centerfold.

Yes that sounds about right :) Until you work at BN or know someone who works there you have no idea how crazy people who shop there can be. Btw a lot of the men we kicked out of the bathrooms did actually purchase books.

Oh and on the topic of The Lovely Bones, it's a wonderful book, and is currently being turned into a movie.

Project nachonaco
06-17-2008, 04:53 AM
*mouthfroth*

It needs to be Tuesday.

I'm so anxious.

My mom wants to do my hair for me. Is she wanting me to be his girlfriend? :eek:

Soccer Mom
06-17-2008, 05:01 AM
*mouthfroth*

It needs to be Tuesday.

I'm so anxious.

My mom wants to do my hair for me. Is she wanting me to be his girlfriend? :eek:

It's a mom thing. She wants you to be happy and meet a nice boy and plan a June wedding with a three-tier cake and ice sculptures so you two can produce 2.5 grandkids in a house in the burbs and she can babysit for you on weekends.

Oops. Forget I said anything. Giving away mom trade-secrets. The mom-mafia is gonna get me.


Honestly, she just wants you to be happy. :D

Project nachonaco
06-17-2008, 09:50 AM
One last question, sorry, have never had a close guy friend before that wasn't online.

Who buys the coffee if we're just friends, me or him or separately?

Do I offer? Do I expect him to offer? Do I accept if he offers?

Good lord, at least now I find men confusing. 10 years from now I'll probably be fed up with their antics.

badducky
06-17-2008, 06:11 PM
My advice?

Don't ask the internet about your love life.

Also, it's important to eat lots of bean burritos whilst dating so you can see if your prospective partner can handle himself politely when you're farting.

Siddow
06-17-2008, 07:22 PM
Now I see why you're called Bad Ducky, lol.

But the advice about not asking the internet is good stuff. Nacho, I've always let them pay. Pay for yourself if not doing so makes you feel "obligated". See? Internet advice. Worthless!

James81
06-17-2008, 07:25 PM
He read me some Edgar Allen Poe, which I thought was very sweet. I love being read to and just the other day I thought how nice it would be if someone would read to me again.



:roll:

Wow, I would never have the balls to read a girl Edgar Allen Poe upon my first meeting. I wouldn't do that until I had her safely mortared up in my basement.

Project nachonaco
06-18-2008, 02:03 AM
Well he showed up late, but in our city the traffic lights are H-O-R-R-I-B-L-E so I can't blame him, haha.

He asked me what I was doing Saturday, I told him I get off at 7.

My mom and dad want to meet him, so that's good, right?

Shall I commence Snoopy-dancing? Have I found my soulmate?

(By the way, he read to me again. Dr. Faustus.)

Siddow
06-18-2008, 03:36 AM
He asked me what I was doing Saturday, I told him I get off at 7.



Just tell me what he said after you said that ^^^

Project nachonaco
06-18-2008, 03:39 AM
He didn't really say anything because he had to go. :(

But I did say that he had to meet my parents first, which was cool with him, so we'll probably just hang out with them and then see a movie or go to B&N again. :)

Snoopy dance time yet?

Siddow
06-18-2008, 03:43 AM
Patience, Nacho.

Project nachonaco
06-18-2008, 03:54 AM
Hey, all this patience will give me practice to wait to hear from agents, right? ;)

Project nachonaco
06-23-2008, 08:22 AM
Sorry for the double post. :p

Well, last night we hung out, we ended up getting ice cream (he paid! That's a good sign, right?) then went over to his house. I met his parents, watched his dogs fight over who got to give me kisses (That was funny), watched Death Note and read a couple of each others stories. :)

I'm into comics and so is he, and he texted me today to ask if I'd read a certain comic. I told him no. This is his exact text:

"And I hope you don't have a problem with people buying you stuff. I just do that for people on occasion."

:)

We are going to the mall/a Japanese restaurant for lunch on Tuesday, and then possibly to his house to watch Enchanted on Blu-Ray. :D And to play Sega Genesis - my fave old school system - he has Aladdin! That was my favorite!

JoNightshade
06-23-2008, 08:39 AM
Just FYI... this took me a loooong time to figure out (think college) but here's a hint: GUYS DON'T FORMALLY ASK GIRLS OUT. Not usually, anyway. He is not going to say "so you want to date?" You are already dating. He picked you up in a bookstore. That means he is not just interested in "being friends." You're dating.

Just so you know. I was caught completely off guard with a dude I had zero interest in, and getting out was messy. :)

Project nachonaco
06-23-2008, 08:50 AM
So his 'you're not my girlfriend' thing is like, reverse psychology? ;)

JoNightshade
06-23-2008, 08:57 AM
So his 'you're not my girlfriend' thing is like, reverse psychology? ;)

He said that?

LYINGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Project nachonaco
06-23-2008, 09:02 AM
He said that?

LYINGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOL, well, his exact words were "I have about three girls who are trying to be my girlfriend".....Hmm....He does seem to enjoy my company, though, and does seem to laugh at silly things that at least one other girl does. :)

Oh, by the way, the 'freak' quota WAS filled at Barnes & Noble's. But not by him. And not by me.

Some guys had etched.....various organs on one table.

And I recognized the names they'd written. Sigh.

JoNightshade
06-23-2008, 09:08 AM
I used to work at a used bookstore. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say our clientele was slightly wackier than your average B&N bunch. ;)

(My middle-aged COWORKER, for example, lived in his car. Nice dude. A little nuts, but nice.)

Project nachonaco
06-23-2008, 09:12 AM
Oh, (I really should be editing my original posts but who reads those more than once? XD)

He also asked if I didn't mind cuddling. :)

I don't. :)

Project nachonaco
06-25-2008, 09:38 AM
One last update:

He gave me a Naruto headband! We are possibly going to an anime convention in January, so it'll come in handy.

And a Gargoyles comic! I used to love that show when I was a kid.

Oh, and my first kiss. :)

JennaGlatzer
06-25-2008, 09:47 AM
Um, wait, let me read that again: your first kiss??

Yes, it IS Snoopy dance time. :D

:snoopy::snoopy::snoopy:

Well, assuming it was a good kiss, of course. If it was a bad kiss, I take back the Snoopies and replace them with broccolis.

Project nachonaco
06-25-2008, 09:52 AM
Holy CRAPPERS, Jenna's alive! LOL!

(Hey, I was gone from you guys for 6 months, I DO have to build up my post count, haha, no, I'm kidding. Post count is not a measure of a crazy cat lady)

Heh. Marcia (correct me if wrong) Brady has fireworks, I have....Broadway songs. LOL, that's what got stuck in my head. :)

JennaGlatzer
06-25-2008, 09:59 AM
I'm alive! Hi!

Which Broadway song?

Project nachonaco
06-25-2008, 10:06 AM
Jimmy from 'Thoroughly Modern Millie'. :)

JennaGlatzer
06-25-2008, 10:13 AM
Phooey. I don't know that one.

I'm old. I was thinking "I Could Have Danced All Night."

Project nachonaco
06-25-2008, 10:18 AM
LOL, Cinderella, nice...

Part of me wonders if I SHOULD be bragging.

Then again, another part of me thinks I would explode if i didn't.

quickWit
06-25-2008, 05:51 PM
One last update:

He gave me a Naruto headband! We are possibly going to an anime convention in January, so it'll come in handy.

And a Gargoyles comic! I used to love that show when I was a kid.

Oh, and my first kiss. :)


Congratulations Nacho! Welcome to the wonderful world of romance. :heart:

JimmyB27
06-25-2008, 06:00 PM
I need to start hanging out in more bookshops.

MrWrite
06-25-2008, 06:04 PM
I will.

We are beginning outside communication with email instead of phone for now.

Should I be overly concerned about the age difference?

(I think the clincher for me was that he picked out a book that I had come on that very day intending to get. Is that a sign?)

Why worry about the age difference? It's only 4 years and it's not as if you're 20 and he's 40 or anything like that. Good luck and I hope it works out for you both! Sounds like you have a lot in common so I don't see why it won't work out :D

donroc
06-25-2008, 06:18 PM
You also can be even more careful. Invest in a PI for due diligence to check him out and his family and associates as well.

Back in the days of my early-mid teens, whenever I asked for a date, the girl's family checked up on mine.