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I'm writing a piece that has a paragraph with the MC's internal dialogue, hallucinated dialogue and dialogue from another character. I have absolutely no idea how to format this so it's readable.
A little background. MC is crazy and is hallucinating that a tree is talking to her. The hallucinated dialogue is in italics. The internal dialogue is normal font, not in italics. Finally, the MC's study partner is reading a problem. That dialogue is in quotes.
I'm trying to convey a sense of confusion and emotional upset for the main character, but right now, I have a train wreck. Can anyone help me?
Here's the chunk I need help with (it's a little long -- I'm not looking for a line by line, just wanted to give you context. Of course if you want to do a line by line . . .) And of course -- thank you!
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"Okay, first question," Susan read. "Party A talks to Party B" You are letting them hurt you. Can't you see they all hate you? "about Party A's cow. Party B offers" She hates you. I can smell her hate. You can smell her.
I straightened up in the wooden chair and scooted closer to the table. Just ignore it. "to buy the cow for one thousand dollars. Party A" He hates you too. He doesn't care about you. He doesn't even love you.
I could feel the tears stinging behind my eyes. Glenn did love me. He told me so. We were planning on what we'd do when we got out of law school. Long term plans. Of course he loved me. He had to. "agrees, if Party B will arrange for the transportation of" How can you think he loves you. He can barely even look at you.
I looked across the table at Glenn. It was true, he was staring at Susan's hands. But he could have been reading the problem along with her. "the cow. Two days later, Party B arrives" No. He's not looking at the exam. He's looking at her. He's looking at her hands, he's held them. He's looking at her arms, he wants them around her. He's looking at her breasts. He's seen them, kissed them. He knows her, her naked body. So much more beautiful than yours.
I couldn't keep the tears from falling from my eyes. It couldn't be true. Glenn was not cheating on me with Susan. He barely had time for me, how could he make time for her? "to take the cow. Party A says the cow has been sold to Party C" Tick, tick, tick. "Was there a contract? If so, identify the breach" He loves her. He is lying to you. They all know and they are all laughing at you. "and the available damages."
Susan looked up, "Okay, so was there a contract?"
A little background. MC is crazy and is hallucinating that a tree is talking to her. The hallucinated dialogue is in italics. The internal dialogue is normal font, not in italics. Finally, the MC's study partner is reading a problem. That dialogue is in quotes.
I'm trying to convey a sense of confusion and emotional upset for the main character, but right now, I have a train wreck. Can anyone help me?
Here's the chunk I need help with (it's a little long -- I'm not looking for a line by line, just wanted to give you context. Of course if you want to do a line by line . . .) And of course -- thank you!
*******************************************************
"Okay, first question," Susan read. "Party A talks to Party B" You are letting them hurt you. Can't you see they all hate you? "about Party A's cow. Party B offers" She hates you. I can smell her hate. You can smell her.
I straightened up in the wooden chair and scooted closer to the table. Just ignore it. "to buy the cow for one thousand dollars. Party A" He hates you too. He doesn't care about you. He doesn't even love you.
I could feel the tears stinging behind my eyes. Glenn did love me. He told me so. We were planning on what we'd do when we got out of law school. Long term plans. Of course he loved me. He had to. "agrees, if Party B will arrange for the transportation of" How can you think he loves you. He can barely even look at you.
I looked across the table at Glenn. It was true, he was staring at Susan's hands. But he could have been reading the problem along with her. "the cow. Two days later, Party B arrives" No. He's not looking at the exam. He's looking at her. He's looking at her hands, he's held them. He's looking at her arms, he wants them around her. He's looking at her breasts. He's seen them, kissed them. He knows her, her naked body. So much more beautiful than yours.
I couldn't keep the tears from falling from my eyes. It couldn't be true. Glenn was not cheating on me with Susan. He barely had time for me, how could he make time for her? "to take the cow. Party A says the cow has been sold to Party C" Tick, tick, tick. "Was there a contract? If so, identify the breach" He loves her. He is lying to you. They all know and they are all laughing at you. "and the available damages."
Susan looked up, "Okay, so was there a contract?"