View Full Version : When nobody loves you

05-20-2008, 10:44 PM
I am starting to feel like everyone is rejecting me. I have had a lot of interest in my nonfiction book and many request for my proposal. But those many requests are starting to add up to many rejections. I don't even get excited about new requests because it is always the same thing. This just really sucks. How do you stay excited about your book when nobody else seems to for very long?

05-20-2008, 10:54 PM
I feel for you. Sometimes it feels better to work on something new while you're sending stuff out - hedge your bets a little.

I'm having a similar experience - agents who really really LIKE my book, but they don't LOVE it...so...REJECTION! Keep pluggin' away and try not to dwell on it too much.

Soccer Mom
05-20-2008, 10:57 PM
You just keep sending it out and write something else. The rejections suck for a while. Just like the excitement over the requests fades, so does the sting from the rejections fade.

Karen Duvall
05-20-2008, 10:59 PM
Or the agents love this and that, but not that and this. Oy.

Chalk it up to a highly competitive business, and don't take it personally. It's business. It's not you. As for the book, start another one. Chances are this one won't take you where you want to go. Write one that will.

"Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want." Words to live by.

05-20-2008, 11:18 PM
What can you do to feel better when the rejections (or The Rejection, i.e. the one that was sooooo close!) are getting you down?

Well, you can come here and try to cheer somebody else up!

Misery loves company, after all.

Plus, besides being able to emphathize and receive empathy, you can usually find someone whose situation puts your own in a somewhat better perspective.

05-20-2008, 11:20 PM
Agents have agendas--plans for the types of work they wish to represent. Just because your work doesn't quite fit in doesn't mean it's 'bad.' Just set the rejection aside (after looking at it closely--there are usually jewels of wisdom hidden in them) keep polishing your manuscript and query it something else.

Rejection is part of the business. *shrug* Gotta get used to it.

05-21-2008, 01:17 AM
Thanks for your posts guys. I just hate this game.

Karen - This one better take me where I want to go. I am not about to start working on another book. It's all or nothing with this one.

Saundra Julian
05-21-2008, 03:42 PM
All or nothing? YIKES! Why is your writing career dependent on one book?

Hang in there, sweetie...

05-21-2008, 04:37 PM
You just keep sending it out and write something else. The rejections suck for a while. Just like the excitement over the requests fades, so does the sting from the rejections fade.

For some people, I guess. I'm sick to death of all of them, and it hasn't gotten any better with time.

But rejections are the price of admission to this one-sided game. Learn to live with it.

05-21-2008, 07:59 PM
Gettingby: All or nothing isn't the way to go. I know you're feeling down now, but you must pick yourself up and forge on. Nothing worth having comes easily.

My wife's grandfather wrote a book (no one knows anything about it) and sent it to a publisher. They rejected it so he threw it away and quit writing. A friend at church who read my novel mentioned that he'd written a book once and queried an agent. When they rejected his query, he gave up. I don't suppose he'd be interested to know that I queried 40 agents on the novel he read before getting representation and sent out 110 queries on an earlier book that never got picked up.

It won't always look as bleak as it does now. Good Luck.

05-22-2008, 12:14 AM
I am writing nonfiction so I think that may make my situation a little different. I am not going to drop this one or put it aside and try to write a different book. I am not writing this because I want to write a book. I want to write this story in book format. Does that make sense? Anyway, I am a journalist so I have no plans to stop writing. This is what I do for a living. My book is an extension of that.

I never thought this would be an easy thing, but I am just so sick of getting so close before knocked down. Maybe that's how things work. Thanks to all of you for your kind words of support.

05-22-2008, 12:45 AM
Since putting on the same shoes as you, I've really looked into this rejection thing, and it turns out a LOT of people suffer from rejection before getting picked up.

Stephen King's first FOUR novels were rejected.

Even the Harry Potter book was rejected by 9 publishers (they must be crying to this DAY!)

And I look around here to see many people who thought they'd never get started. You're just at the stage you need to remember when you finally make it. You need to look back at this feeling and really appreciate having a writing career. And most of the hard work is behind you: you've written a great book and an amazing query letter.

Now you just have to get it in the right hands. You will. And in the meantime, keep polishing and keep your mind open. In a month's time, that agent you queried 2 weeks ago and totally forgot about might be dying to get his hands on such a book. It just goes that way sometimes.


05-22-2008, 12:48 AM

...Just what makes that little old ant. Think he can move that rubber tree plant...

okay. Take your hands down. I'll stop singing.

It sucks. But hearing success (and rejection) stories of everyone else does help. I never would have dreamed that writing would be the easy part.
Hang in there! I'm with you there in query hell. Misery does love company. ;)