View Full Version : Beta Reader or Exchange / Thriller.

Mr Flex
05-11-2008, 10:43 PM
The first draft is complete. 125,000 words. Below is my event index.

Chapter One
Helen leaves her husband, Strauss Goldstone.
Strauss has a long chat with his brother, Alex and decides to go to the USA, to visit his cousin, Morgan
Helen tells Alex that she has had a termination and regrets it.

Chapter Two
Morgan Goldstone, a drug dealer himself, is pressured by other drug dealers.
Georgia, calmly lets her partner, Andrew, choke to death.

Chapter Three
Morgan saves Daniella from her pimp, she moves into his apartment.
Daniella begins work at Babylon. Morgan warns off Daniella's pimp, permanently.
Morgan and Daniella have regrettable sex.

Chapter Four
Strauss arrives at Morgan's, in the USA, he meets Natalie.
Daniella, attempts to cut out somebody's tongue.

Chapter Five
Strauss helps Morgan see through Daniella's chequered past. Strauss is shot and killed, by Jamaican gang members. Morgan and Daniella, hide his body in a commercial freezer.

Chapter Six
With the help of Natalie, Morgan tracks down Strauss killers' and takes revenge, murdering them all.

Chapter Seven
Morgan makes a commitment to Daniella, before fleeing to England, fearing the police and the Jamaicans are after him. Morgan assumes his cousin Strauss identity.
Natalie discovers that she is pregnant. The deceased, Strauss is the father.

Chapter Eight
Alex, after she hospitalises him. finally starts a romantic relationship, with his enemy, Queens Counsel, Claire Bristol. Alex is a criminal lawyer.

Chapter Nine
Morgan arrives in England and tells Alex of his brother's death. Alex agrees that Morgan should keep Strauss' indentity until he can sort something out.
Morgan discovers large amounts of Marijuana, growing in Strauss' loft. On a double date with Claire and Adele, Morgan and Alex foil an armed robbery in a nightclub. Morgan starts to have nightmares, triggered by his murder of the three Jamaican drug dealers.

Chapter Ten
During a marijuana drought. Morgan sells what he found in the loft, this upsets Morris Chambers, the local gangster. Morris is killed in a freak accident, the community believe in was a hit, organised by the Goldstones. Believing the Goldstones are gangsters, all of Morris' businesses are handed over to them.

Chapter Eleven
After another double date, Adele and Morgan have drunken sex. Adele discovers that Morgan is not Alex' brother Strauss as he claims to be. Fascinated by the gangster world. Adele breaks off her engagement to her soldier boyfriend.

Chapter Twelve
The Goldstones open a London bar, named Absolution, they open a 24hr carwash and bring Daniella over to re-organise their prostitutes. Claire moves in with Alex.
Claire's father Harry, is corrupt cop, he unsuccessfully attempts to extort money from the Goldstones.
Adele starts work for the Goldstones as the supervisor of their bar.

Chapter Thirteen
The launch night of the bar. Claire punches her father. Helen comes looking for her husband Strauss, believing Adele is his new girlfriend. Daniella discovers that Adele has slept with Morgan, the two women fight before becoming friends. Helen cut's her wrists.
Adele's jilted partner turns up and causes a fight in the bar. Claire blames her father for her mothers suicide.

Chapter Fourteen
Morris Chambers wife, Diane offers the Goldstones Morris loan shark business. Alex proposes to Claire. Adele, Claire and Daniella become closer friends. Morgan's nightmares become more intense.

Chapter Fifteen
Alex breaks a customers arm for selling drugs in his bar. The Goldstones then rob another local gangster, Hatcher, of his drugs and cash. The police chase Morgan using a helicopter. Alex foils Claire's father again. While Claire's away Adele and Alex start to play.

Chapter Sixteen
The Goldstones start a loan business. Morgan loses 2kg of cocaine by leaving it in a car. A detective named Stephenson arrives on the scene, he offers the Goldstones assistance and cooperation. He paints a bigger picture for them. Alex is lead to believe that Claire has disposed of the drugs that Morgan lost. Alex decides to confess to Claire everything he and Morgan have been up to.

Chapter Seventeen
The Goldstones rob a bigger local gangster, after receiving a tip off from Stephenson, they hijack a large shipment of drugs. They use part of the shipment to frame Hatcher, the smaller dealer.

Chapter Eighteen
Adele discovers Alex and Claire's secret wedding plans. Alex buys a racehorse for Claire's birthday, he names it Absolution. Adele and Daniella plan a surprise for the planned wedding day.

Chapter Nineteen
Alex and Claire get married and go on their honeymoon, while they are away, lead by Harry Bristol, the police raid all the Goldstone business', Adele gets arrested. Morgan's continued nightmares become more graphic.

Chapter Twenty
A day at the races, Absolution wins his first race, some bookmakers suspect fraud. Alex buys another horse and name's it after Adele. Adele and Daniella, plan and execute revenge on Harry, causing him to be charged with rape, he loses his job. The Goldstones purchase a bar in the USA, Morgan and Daniella, return to the USA.

Chapter Twenty One
After receiving a tip Harry, three armed gunmen, wanting their drugs back barricade themselves in the bar, taking hostages. During the ensuing siege, the Goldstones kill all the assailants. Alex discovers his wife might be the real gangster, not him. Claire takes her horse to the USA to race. Using the horse as cover, Claire smuggles, Strauss' body back to England.

Chapter Twenty Two
The Goldstones want to get out of the gangster business. Natalie gives birth to Strauss child. The Goldstones sell the carwash, the last of their illegal businesses. Adele admits her love for Alex. Claire and the horse go missing, a suicide note arrives. Alex discovers the whereabouts of Morgan's sister. Claire uses Strauss body, and the missing cocaine to frame her father. *Adele suspects she pregnant.

Chapter Twenty Three
Alex gets to the bottom of Morgan's nightmares. Alex and Morgan, go to find Morgan's long lost sister, Georgia. A massive search for Claire and the horse is undertaken. Unwittingly, Georgia speaks to Claire and convinces her to keep her life and return to her husband.

*Had to do that, it's the only way the sequel works!