My Frustration and the Overwhelming Urge to Give Up

Virector · May 1, 2008

I enjoy writing very much and I have a great passion for it. Daily, new ideas come to me and daily I make another attempt to write a decent piece of literature, but try as I may, I KNOW I can't write well! I try with all my might, muster all the emotion and creative notions of mine and pour my heart out onto paper. When I'm done, I read it to myself and it becomes apparent I am not skilled in the craft- I am unable... A wannabe...

And yet I have so many wonderful characters in my head and so many worlds I'd like to share, but I am unable to write well enough to be read... I have few accomplishments as a writer and I feel frustrated and I want to give up, but I can't because I love writing... Often on these boards, I read of a breed of unskilled writers who just want to write because they think they can write but really can't, and I often feel like I fall under that category. I realy, really wish I could write well and it frustrates me that my own work fails to satisfy me-- what of anyone else? I'm sorry to bring my frustrations to the board- I just want to share my feelings with proper writers in the hope that in all humility, you may share with me means by which I can advance myself as a writer. Thanks for listening.

WildScribe · May 1, 2008

Well, to be fair to yourself, you are talking about first drafts. Most of our first drafts are rubbish... the mark of a REAL writer in my own humble opinion is someone who is willing to rewrite and rewrite and rewrite until that piece is not just readable, but shining. It's hard... and it sucks. But it can be so, so worth it in the end.

Good luck!!!

Blessings,
Wildscribe

hammerklavier · May 1, 2008

What books are you comparing your own work to... i.e., whose work are you holding up as your standard... your favorite authors?

I'm just saying, I know I'll never write as well as some of my favorite authors... but I think I can write as well as some other published authors I've read.

IceCreamEmpress · May 1, 2008

Virector said:
When I'm done, I read it to myself and it becomes apparent I am not skilled in the craft

Ah, but that's the part you can fix. It's much harder to teach people how to have ideas that excite them, and harder still to teach them to be motivated to improve.

Classes? Writers groups? Sharing more work in "Share Your Work" here?

In which areas do you feel you need most improvement? The mechanics of grammar, syntax, and punctuation? Vocabulary-building? Self-editing? Pacing? Understanding the conventions of different genres?

Keyboard Hound · May 1, 2008

I agree wholeheartedly with Wildscribe and IceCreamEmpress. The sparkle comes in the rewrites. So many people quit a few drafts away from a wonderful story. You'll never know what you can make of your work until you fight it through to the end.

Your post proved you can write plenty good to form the basis of a story. That's when the real work begins. Good critters can help you a lot with what comes next.

Virector · May 1, 2008

Not so much the mechanical aspect- grammar, syntax, punctuation and the like. More so the inability to write captivating, excitable material, a more or less 'limited' vocabulary and no... *spark* in the writing and what I believe to be poor technique and execution. I don't know if this makes any sense... Forgive me-- I am not entirely up to speed with all the technical terminologies...

inkkognito · May 1, 2008

I agree with I.C.E. You are farther along than many people because you recognize that you need to improve. Now you just have to get a specific plan in place. You need to isolate the specific areas where you feel you're not measuring up and create a plan with very specific steps for how to resolve that.

I think almost everyone has doubts every now and then. The trick is to control those doubts vs. letting them control you. You have to ferret out their core and make a plan to deal with that core, which takes away its power. Then you can put all your focus into refining your craft.

Matera the Mad · May 1, 2008

You are so much better off than someone who thinks that he needs no improvement! Rejoice! Because you are willing to do the work that will get the job done, you have a far greater hope of achievement than someone who thinks that it is easy.

Don't you dare give up.

Virector · May 1, 2008

Might I add-- Is the fact that I have read many, but not a very huge amount of books a contributing factor to my inability?

inkkognito · May 1, 2008

What kind of books? Books about writing, or books for entertainment that you are comparing yourself too? If it's the latter, beware of comparisons with other writers. That's like comparing Van Gogh to Rockwell. Very, very different style, but very subjective as to whether one is more talented than the other. You have to develop confidence in your own voice.

Dale Emery · May 1, 2008

Virector said:
I realy, really wish I could write well and it frustrates me that my own work fails to satisfy me-- what of anyone else?

Two things. First, if you can tell whether your work is good or not, then you have the discrimination that will allow you to improve over time.

Second, if I understand correctly, it's common (and maybe universal) among artists of all kinds for their work to fall somewhat short of their vision.

So: You're not alone, and you can get better.

Dale

Virector · May 1, 2008

Thank you all. Well, I mostly compare my own writing to more popular books such as Harry Potter and LOTR and the like since I'm into writing fantasy, and though I have fairly original ideas, my writing just doesn't seem as exciting and/or captivating as those.

IceCreamEmpress · May 1, 2008

Virector said:
Thank you all. Well, I mostly compare my own writing to more popular books such as Harry Potter and LOTR

Aren't you much younger than J. K. Rowling, who had a university degree in English Literature and work experience as both a researcher for Amnesty International and a teacher of English as a foreign language, before she wrote the Harry Potter books?

Doesn't it make sense that she learned a great deal about writing in her university education and her work experience? And that you, too, will have the opportunity to learn these things at your own pace?

As for Tolkien--he was one of the most learned people in England, and had written several academic books and had been teaching at Oxford for years before he wrote the first word of the Lord of the Rings books.

Try not to be too impatient with yourself. You may well have lots to learn, but you've got lots of time to learn it.

Virector · May 1, 2008

Thank you, IceCreamEmpress. You made a strong point there- it's hugely innapropriate for me to expect to write anything like Rowling or Tolkien when both are decades older than me! I'll try and be more realistic from now on.

Shadow_Ferret · May 1, 2008

Think of writing as a marathon, not a sprint. It's a long distance to the finish, pace yourself, and enjoy the surroundings.

Um.

That seemed like a good analogy, but it made no sense.

What I'm trying to say is, you might not be where you want to be NOW but keep on plugging and you'll improve, you'll get better, you'll gain experience, and soon, 10 miles down, 15 miles down, 20 miles down the road you WILL be writing at the level you think you should be.

Don't give up. Keep on working hard and learning and one day you'll wake up, read something you wrote the night before, and say, "Holy shit! I wrote that? That is good!"

Virector · May 1, 2008

Thanks.

ishtar'sgate · May 1, 2008

I would certainly recommend that you keep at it. When I think of some of the things I wrote when I first started out.....(shudder)

I also see you like to make music. Maybe you'd enjoy songwriting.
Linnea

Virector · May 1, 2008

ishtar'sgate said:
I would certainly recommend that you keep at it. When I think of some of the things I wrote when I first started out.....(shudder)
I also see you like to make music. Maybe you'd enjoy songwriting.
Linnea

Gee, I don't know... I've never thought of that. I make beats (instrumentals) but I don't really know if I'd be any good at the songwriting...

Appalachian Writer · May 1, 2008

Just like you don't become an electrician overnight, you don't become a writer overnight. Keep practicing. Practice makes perfect. Hang in there.

Virector · May 1, 2008

Appalachian Writer said:
Practice makes perfect.

Perfect practice makes perfect... so I've heard.

eveningstar · May 1, 2008

Virector said:
Thank you all. Well, I mostly compare my own writing to more popular books such as Harry Potter and LOTR and the like since I'm into writing fantasy, and though I have fairly original ideas, my writing just doesn't seem as exciting and/or captivating as those.

In my experience, it gets a lot easier once you stop comparing your writing to anyone else's. You can find your own voice. And you can only get better with practice and time.

Exir · May 1, 2008

Might I add-- Is the fact that I have read many, but not a very huge amount of books a contributing factor to my inability?

I don't think the sheer number of books matter as much as the amount of time and effort you put into reading. If you only read a book a week, but spend a lot of time going over every sentence, seeing how the masters put words to paper, then it might be even more beneficial to your writing than if you had been breezing through a book a day.

zahra · May 3, 2008

I'm sure I'm not the only one who read the OP and thought, 'That's me!', so thanks not only for the replies, but also to Virector for bringing up the painful subj.

Melenka · May 3, 2008

Don't give up, Vee. Trust me. I didn't give up so much as stop. The world got more complicated, interesting, time consuming, stressful. I set the writing aside for too many years. Strangely, it was a friend writing fan fiction that made me want to write again. I can't do fan fic, but her writing was brilliant, lyrical, powerful, compelling and she was totally obsessed with what turned out to be a novel-length project. Her life was no less fraught than mine. Her enthusiasm for writing re-opened that door for me (and she has graciously propped a brick in it ever since) and I can honestly say that I have not been this happy in years. Keep writing.

BlueLucario · May 3, 2008

Virector said:
Thank you all. Well, I mostly compare my own writing to more popular books such as Harry Potter and LOTR and the like since I'm into writing fantasy, and though I have fairly original ideas, my writing just doesn't seem as exciting and/or captivating as those.

I feel the same when I first started writing. You can't expect to be perfect the first time, even though the urge for perfection is sometimes difficult to resist.

In class, I always compare my own work to another classmate. One tends to be hilarious, the rest of the class applauds after hearing another girls poem. But when I read my stuff, my wip included, people just stare, no laughing no crying. It makes me mad, because i feel that I'm always doing something wrong.

Then I started writing, showing off my own work online, and to my peers, hoping someone could actually like it. If not, then I feel that I'm not good enough to be a writer, I automatically suck. i always write, doing everything in my power to make it good. Make someone enjoy it.

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