Tsuki's science lessons

All right kids, first science lesson:

Theoretically speaking, time reversal is possible. Once a certain mass has reached, and surpassed, the speed of light, it creates a time vaccuum (in mathmatical terms, it creates the improper fraction of 1/0, which when applied to the real world, is physically impossible) and all time is sucked back into itself. This herein proves that magic is real.


Lesson numbah two!:

When throwing an object at the ground, the force of gravity pulls an object, thus accelerating its speed beyond the initial speed at which it was thrown. If the object in question meets with an obstacle, such as pavement, a force of repulsion equal and oppsite of the the object being thrown comes into play. If the object's density cannot stand up to the pressure of the two forces colliding, it will disperse to compensate for the difference. This means that if you drop a baby off of a sky scraper, it doesn't matter how gently you toss the baby, its head will still explode upon impact. My conclusion, you ask? All babies have the potential to resemble a broken sunny side up egg, but no baby works like a hover craft.

That is all.

kct webber said:

What if the baby has atrocious gas and you throw him bottom side down.

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It depends on the baby's luck. If the baby gets scared and rips on too soon, then the baby will merely slow his rate of accerelation and die a slow painful death instead of a quick, dippy-egg one. If the baby is lucky enough to rip one at the precise time, then he will slow his speed enough to cushion his fall. However, the force of impact will be still be strong enough it push the gas back into the baby's stomach, causing him to suffer from colic for a small period of time before spontaneously combusting (the impact that caused the colic also imcreased the temperature of the methane in the baby's stomach and...poof).

maestrowork said:

That's just a theory. How about some experiments to prove your hypothesis?

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*sigh* Always a critic, eh Ray? Honestly, the math should be enough proof for anyone:

+

=

kct webber said:

Ah, damn. I really want to see that last pic, but it ain't workin'.

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Should be. Here's the link: http://www.worth1000.com/entries/244500/244997HmPL_w.jpg

kct webber said:

There's nothing there. (cannot display this webpage.) Thanks anyway. I can guess. My imagination is good enough, I think.

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Damn. Well, the first image was kid friendly, but I guess I'll have to stoop to mild horror and dark comedy instead:

Maryn said:

Then how to you explain this?






















(wait for it)

Maryn, who found so many such images it was hard to choose

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This is more relevant to science lesson number one, which concluded that magic is real.

Unique said:

Magic is real (of course it's real!) I'll tell you why:

Yesterday I changed the date stamp for our return cards at the library. The day prior's due date was April 30; yesterday's due date was May 1st.

My co-worker came out to the computers to check the due date ... I told her I'd already changed the time stamps and had done some cards - they said May 1st.

I looked at the ones she did. They said April 30. I did one. It said April 30th. Knowing that I'd changed the dates ... I pulled out the date book ...'well, maybe I stuck it back in without changing it...'

Ha. April 30 is in the book. I checked the machine itself. May 1st. So one must conclude that for the machine to do the impossible and stamp the date as April 30 when May 1st is installed, it must be ... FM. Freakin' Magic.

I agree with Tsuki. Magic is real. I saw it myself, yesterday and so did my co-worker.
(Next time you play with the time/space continuum, Tsuki - how about a warning?)

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I dunno, that doesn't sound like normal magic. That sounds like you pissed off Merlin's younger brother, Vinny. He's not nearly as skilled as Merlin, but he is relentless. You'll have to deal with small, inconvenient, aggravating mishaps until the end of days, and he'll never let you forget the day you messed with Vinny.

I can't give a warning next time I play wih the continuum- half that time I don't even know I'm going to do it. It's destiny!

Unique said:

Well do it in the future. Then you can come back to the past and tell us about it so we'll be warned.

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Can do! Now if you'll excuse me, I have to throw a foil-clad gerbil into the microwave and make myself a time travelling cap out of pipe cleaners.

maestrowork said:

Nice suspense. Depriving us like that. Good going.

I still say we need some empirical evidence. And you always need to do an experiment twice to double check your results.

Now, whose baby's for sale?

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Guess magic does exist, and it hates me (and Unique). It's overtaking our machines, changing out dates, and deleting our pictures. Frankly, I will not act like the victim in this- I refuse to put another image up! I will not be magic's plaything! I'll just let you all use your imaginations instead.

And for the record, I did test this experiment quite a few times. That's why I lost my babysitting job

Unique said:

Next time you're messing about - drop me off in 1976. I want a 'Do-Over'.

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You're crazy. Depending on how you do on your "do-over", I might not be born. Haven't you ever seen The Terminator? Or Back to the Future? No do-overs, but I'll be sure to bring you back some weed. "I remember back in the days when a dime bag cost a dime...."