Okay, one of the biggest problems in my writing is slipping briefly from Past tense into Present tense and back.
I have this one paragraph that I've struggled with all along, and I STILL can't figure out which way is better to write this thing.
Here is my problem paragraph: (I'll put the paragraph that comes before it too, just to give it some context)
I wasn’t surprised to see Flory. She and Uncle Thomas dated some before; but they were seeing a lot of each other since I’d been living with him. I suspected they were getting serious too . . . they were together nearly all of their free time lately.
* But Flory's neat, so I don't mind. I like her because she doesn't remind me one bit of my mom. I try not to think about my mom, it hurts too bad. And Flory's personality isn't anything like Mom's. Maybe that's why I get along with her so well.
versus
* But Flory's neat, so I didn’t mind. I liked her because she didn’t remind me one bit of my mom. I tried not to think about my mom, it hurt way too bad. And Flory’s personality isn’t anything like Mom’s, maybe that was why I got along with her so well.
Is that first * paragraph Present tense???? For some reason, I LIKE the way IT is worded better than the other way. . . .
Is this simply a matter of putting an ,I thought, in that paragraph or something, so I could keep it worded that way?
PLEASE help! Any thoughts on this????
I have this one paragraph that I've struggled with all along, and I STILL can't figure out which way is better to write this thing.
Here is my problem paragraph: (I'll put the paragraph that comes before it too, just to give it some context)
I wasn’t surprised to see Flory. She and Uncle Thomas dated some before; but they were seeing a lot of each other since I’d been living with him. I suspected they were getting serious too . . . they were together nearly all of their free time lately.
* But Flory's neat, so I don't mind. I like her because she doesn't remind me one bit of my mom. I try not to think about my mom, it hurts too bad. And Flory's personality isn't anything like Mom's. Maybe that's why I get along with her so well.
versus
* But Flory's neat, so I didn’t mind. I liked her because she didn’t remind me one bit of my mom. I tried not to think about my mom, it hurt way too bad. And Flory’s personality isn’t anything like Mom’s, maybe that was why I got along with her so well.
Is that first * paragraph Present tense???? For some reason, I LIKE the way IT is worded better than the other way. . . .
Is this simply a matter of putting an ,I thought, in that paragraph or something, so I could keep it worded that way?
PLEASE help! Any thoughts on this????