Comedy Cabaret--2012 Road Trip

He's been like this since the beginning of fleet week.

Yay! People. One of the other threads has gone night-night already

cray said:

oh dear. well,...
*ambles up on stage. turns on mic*
you see, well, it seems that haggis bought him. he wanted a nice seagull as a pet. except that after several weeks of trying, haggis was unable to get it to speak a single word. in desperation he takes the bird to a vet for advice.
the vet tells him that the seagull’s beak is too long which is preventing him from speaking. he says that he can file it down for $100.

haggis thought that was rather expensive and wondered aloud if he could just file it down himself. the vet tells him that it is a very delicate procedure and must be done by a trained professional. if he does not file enough, the gull still won’t be able to talk, but if he files too much, the bird will drown while drinking his water.

haggis decides to think it over and leaves with del.

several weeks later, the vet happens to meet the haggis who is looking rather down. he inquires about del. haggis replies that his seagull is dead.
"did you try to file his beak down yourself?" asked the vet.

haggis nods his head.

"and he drowned while trying to drink his water, right?"

"no," replied haggis, "he was dead when i took his head out of the vise."

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Hey, cray....


Come over here, you sweet thing.



Closer, cutie pie.




Mmmm. Just a little closer.











Haggis? Come here little doggie....



I've got a treat for you too...

Rolling Thunder said:

Haggis, break out the penicillin. cray's spreading clap again.

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I thought that was QW's baliwick ..

... oh ... never mind

So...um, Gail! Kill anyone fun lately?

GailD said:

Haggis? Come here little doggie....



I've got a treat for you too...

Click to expand...

I'm thinking that might not be to my benefit.


ETA: I'm also thinking Del's version of your pussycat might make a lovely avatar for you.

Seems some folks around here have got a death-wish.



*goes off to borrow Jay's whip*


ETA: I'm nothing, if not obliging.

*gives Reg, ToT, Kaylea, PD, Gail, Angie, Cella, Nina, and Swashzaki (SP?) a cup of morning coffee just cause.*

Might want to consider an avatar upgrade there, Gilroy.

What is that, reg? Looks like a couple of toasters with legs.

No, that's a Brewbot. But there is an Autobot named Toaster.


...

...

I loath that I know that...

Now --this-- is a toaster with legs.

Maybe that's Reg pushing two vacuum cleaners. It can't be anything else, can it?

*ambles up to gilroy*

*pours a fresh cup of coffee*


*sip*

so,...what's the deal today? i know we have the revolution on the schedule but that shouldn't take too long.
what else can we do today?

*sip*


*looks at reg*

good. yes. vacuum up a bit. we want this place to look nice for the revolution.


*sip*

don't you sleep, pd?

*sip*

anyway, are you in on the revolt or what?
all the cool kids are doing it.

Hey, reg. I have an important question to ask you about transformers.

Is there one that turns into cilantro?

Silent Rob said:

Hey, reg. I have an important question to ask you about transformers.

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^this right here had some potential...

Is there one that turns into cilantro?

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^then this happened...

agree. i would have asked a megan fox question right there.

Good morning


is today going to be a good day?

*shakes cray, turns him over*