Dwayne,
I fully understand your frustration. I sure wish there were an ironclad technique or system out there that if you used it, by the letter, it would produce a publishable novel. Sadly, this system doesn't exist. What works for one author, doesn't work for another.
When I first started writing, I was spinning my wheels. I had no idea where to start, what to do...nothing. I bought book after book and have quite the collection of writing books now. They are all filled little techniques you can use for varying parts and phases of a novel. But they all said one thing that was consistent through to the end. To write a novel, you have to write a novel.
Well, thanks, I knew that and it still didn't help me get started! Telling me to 'just write' really wasn't helping me at that point.
Then I stumbled on this site:
http://www.advancedfictionwriting.com/art/snowflake.php
It's yet another person who has all these neat and nifty ways to write the phases of a novel. And like all the other books, he does try to tie them all together. The thing was, I don't know, maybe it was the stars aligning right or something, this method seemed to speak to me. I had nothing to lose and it did seem to have everything laid out from beginning to end on 'how-to' so I figured 'what the hell?' and gave it a shot.
I wrote my first novel this way when I won my first NaNo! So I have a complete novel. It needs work. It needs a lot of work. Of course it does, it's my first draft! There are writers on this board whose first draft is very close to their final and boy do I envy them. That's the way they write. This is the way I write. Maybe one day I'll be at their place. But for now, my first draft is a mess and I have a lot of work left on it.
That's ok, though. Because for all the books and all the reading I've done, I now have yet more tools and techniques in those books to help my ms further along. I just needed something to jumpstart me.
This new work I'm in the middle of, I tried the snowflake method and failed horribly. That's ok, too! I have listened to the others on this board, I have pm'd with many of them and talked about how they do things and made note. Mulled them in my head. Turned them over and over, looking for a fit. Even experimented with a few.
I think I've found one and I'm running with it.
It may work, it may not. One thing I've learned with the writing process is you are guaranteed nothing except that you will work for it.
So keep at it. Try something new. If that doesn't work, it's not a failure, it's only one way that didn't work
for you right then, and then try something else. Soon you'll hit on a way to pull yourself into the next phase.
It may never get easier for me and I'm ok with that. My joy comes in the effort and with the knowledge that one day, I will have something worth publishing because I'm working hard toward that end and I'm having fun while doing it.