The Bent Nail Saloon.

regdog

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The gators are going to eat folk who happen by. Free entertainment.
 

regdog

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But they're our pets. We can't eat the pets.
 

FOTSGreg

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Irwin's the bitey one. Steve'll pract'ly roll over and let ya' rub his belly.

They eats pets in China or so I hears. Cats, dogs, rats, lotsa' things. Now, we wouldn't eat Steve or Irwin, well, not the gators with them names anyway, but if'n we don't thin the herd a might now and then we'll be hip deep in gators come this time next year.

'Course, I could transfer some of 'em o'er t' the Hounds basement where they'll be very happy... That's sorta' where these ones came from anyways.
 

Haggis

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Thing is, Preacher, if'n reg don't let us eat no gators, we're gonna have to eat us some Hounds. Just sayin'.
 

FOTSGreg

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Hmmm, we ain't been gittin' thet many vis'tors t' the Hounds fer awhile now. We could elect us a reg'lar, I 'spose. Reckon that big lizard thingie you been fat'nin' up with all them rus..., er, all them cows you dun rounded up and drove in a few days ago might be okay. It's lizard and it's big so's it might taste like gator.

She's a mean 'n though. You go first.
 

regdog

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We could have a Hound roast and feed the leftovers t the gators.
 

regdog

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You really want to pizen them gaters?

No, I just thought a Hound roast would be fun
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I might jus' haf t' recuse messef' from any Houndiques fer certain reasons I'll haf t' takes the 5th on...

<takes 5th out from under bar>

Hey, you pay for that 5th.
 

regdog

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We have both. We're an equal opportunity saloon.
 

regdog

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The more the merrier
 

Haggis

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<wanders outside and starts sizin' up the front of the saloon for battlements, wanders back inside and pours self a pint of whiskey>

We'll be the only saloon in the west that looks like a castle. Now, if I can figure out how to make it dark and stormy all the time...

Shoot, that's easy. All you need is a prologue.

*spit*
 

regdog

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Greg, why are you trying to install battlements on my saloon?
 

Haggis

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Reg, I suspect Greg's a plannin' on a gittin' hisself ready fer the zombie apokls...apockal...apoch...attack thingy.
 

regdog

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There will be no zombie attack thingy here. We have enough patrons who don't pay.
 

regdog

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Yes, yes it is.