Ask A Stupid Question, Get a Stupid Answer (Volume II)

PorterStarrByrd

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That kind of depends on what kind of business you are in.

Anybody got a list of things you can learn in prison?
 

swachski

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Just google 'free trade,' then reverse everything.

Does ADT solicit maximum security prisons?
 

MrYikes

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ADT is the underarm deodorant of the security business.

Is there a menu in the Senator's office?
 

PorterStarrByrd

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Senators order off the menu and under the table.

You thought they were paupers, or something, didn't you?
 

kenthepen

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Between stipends, per diem, expense accounts, PAC money, and legal insider trading, their only poverty is of compassion and humanity.

Order off the menu of evils?
 

swachski

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I'll have the devil's food cake.

Split the tab?
 

MrYikes

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Wahl, he did up to when he got that hernia thing, now he just sits there pokin it back in.

If'n I was to go to soakin mah feet in sumthin, whadda figger would be good nuf?
 

kenthepen

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I sokes ma feets in wite litenen, cuz it cyurrs evverthang.

Alkyhawl kin be abbzorbbed rite inta yer skin?
 

swachski

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Let's go with sashimi shimmy ko ko pop

Need more sake to wash it down?
 

swachski

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Maybe some ice in that tub would be preferable.

Can you get a prescription for chill pills?
 

L.J.

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You could always just put 'em on ice.

That's not what my doctor said, is it?
 

Silent Rob

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He did say that, but it was about Bubba's unmentionables.

Where is that crazy redneck?
 

L.J.

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In the foothills looking for Sasquatch.

Where did you expect him to be?
 

swachski

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Yeah, it said Now Playing: "Bubba and the Hendersons"

Why is the subtitle: Deliverance of Fried Chicken and Cornbread"?
 

swachski

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It is!

Doesn't one of the songs start with: "The hills are alive with the sound of squealing"?