Am I using And and But too much?

Seeing a sample of your writing would help here. A lot of "and then" isn't better than being choppy. Vary your sentence structure in more ways.

If this is your first draft, it may be that you don't know enough yet to decide what kind of sentences are needed. Finish the draft and revisit when you have a better understanding of your character and the voice.

It could be that the problem is one of voice. Try writing in another point of view and see if that flows better.

Without an example, that's the best I can do to help you. I hope it works.

What Debbie said. Get yourself 50 posts so you can put up a few pages of your work on SWY. That way, you'll get a lot of crit from others. You'll probably need to restructure a lot of your sentences from what I can gather. In general, the easiest way is to go and pick up a few books to read. That's the only way to learn.

Try reading your piece aloud. If it doesn't sound right, then you know you need to rewrite it. Reading aloud reveals issues you don't see on the writing page.

Seconding the "read it aloud" suggestion. "Then" is used to indicate that actions occured in sequence. There's no need to use it to make sure the reader keeps reading.

Relax. Trust that your reader will read the next sentence. Flow is about setting up expectations in the reader's mind to make the reader want to find out what happens next. Mix up sentence lengths, change cadences, sometimes give the reader what they want, sometimes withhold. Remember that you don't need to detail every fiddly bit of action. Only include what's important to the story.

Telling a story is somewhat like performing a fan dance. You want to keep your audience waiting for the payoff at the end. Hint, tease, and never put all your "cards" on the table immediately.

Also consider who your narrator is. Yes, even in third person, there's an invisible narrator and it's not the author. Put yourself in the narrator's shoes and tell the story in the narrator's voice.

Hope this helps!

"And then" can seem jarring or out of place on the page, and without having seen the context it's place in or how you use it, I would advise against it.

"But" -- and this is my own opinion -- is a matter of taste when used sparingly. Sometimes I find myself using it when necessary to contrast, or when moving the narrator's voice from one point to the next. It largely depends on the voice your manuscript is in and how you use it.

I'm sure any number of my former grammar teachers would be giving me the evil eye right about now. >_>

Not flowing doesn't necessarily mean sentences are too short.

Flow means everything reads smoothly with clarity.

Events and the content of sentences connect with each other and the reader is steadily drawn along in the unfolding story without scratching his head every other sentence wondering what you mean or what you are talking about.

... look for ways to vary your sentences.

I'd go with you, but I'm running late.
I'd go with you if I wasn't running late.
etc.

Yeah, read it a loud, or get one of the reading programs, yreader or natural reader(I think it is), these can help a lot for the flow of your writing.

And(haha couldnt resist) - always a good thing to post in the share your work. There is no better way to improve I think then offering your latest up to be read.

Read it outloud and ask someone else to read it as well, because you know how it should sound whereas they don't. So while you might not stumble they might.

Also, "and then" is rarely needed in a sentence. I used to use "and", "then" and "but" quite a lot but over the years I've trained myself to use them sparingly because most of the time they're not needed and by loosing them you get more punchy sentences. If you don't loose anything by getting rid of them then you don't need them.

If you like your ands, give in to them. Go with the flow. Point to Cormac McCarthy to justify yourself: He hung the hat on a peg by the door among slickers and blanketcoats and odd pieces of tack and came to the stove and got his coffee and took it to the table.

I think just having the problem will make you a better writer. I know I have the same question about my writing and the fact that I am conscious of it makes me work harder coming up with better sentences. But, you know, even though I worry about it, no one has ever pointed it out while critiquing my work. Maybe we're overthinking it.

1.) Learn all the coordinating conjunctions: and, or, but, for, yet, nor, so. If you feel like you're overusing 'and' and 'but,' you have other options.

2.) 'And then' is rarely useful. If you want to connect two things, 'then' is usually sufficient. Example: He drank the coffee and then ate his cake. He drank coffee then ate his cake. Cutting out 'and's will not confuse the meaning of most 'and then' sentences and you're sentence will be cleaner.

I second all the great advice. Play with your words and punctuation. You'll find there is more than one way to combine your words.
Oh! If a word stand out to you the writer as redundant the reader will most likely say the same.

One easy self-diagnostic is to use the search/replace feature and take all of the ands and buts out of a 5 page sample (use "match case" and take them out where capitalized). Then go through and correct capitalization without trying to look at anything else. Once you've done that, see where you think they need to be added back in (it will probably be a minority of the time, if you really think this is a problem).

It really helps to just take a look with them gone.

Reading aloud made me realize how to fix my writing. My goal became to have my sentences read with a cadence that was nice to the ear. By doing that it made my writing more enjoyable. I didn't do that until I cleaned up the story though.