You took the words right outta my mouth!

Caitlin Black · May 1, 2012

...talking nonsense, it soon became apparent that her title was an honorific.

The battle of...

amboyleauthor · May 1, 2012

Wicked Ninnies goes on all around us unnoticed by most.

The French are....

Gilroy Cullen · May 1, 2012

lost in a sea of confusion because the English bested them in soccer.

The Capital Dome...

swachski · May 1, 2012

...could be improved with a little Rogaine.

This road can only lead to...

jjdebenedictis · May 1, 2012

...Oz, but if those bricks really are gold, then I think there should be no road to Oz, ifyouknowwhatI'msaying.

Ding-dong, the...

L.J. · May 1, 2012

... cops are at the door.

Every person should ....

swachski · May 1, 2012

...take one secret service agent and hide him in the closet.

Someone needs to escort...

jjdebenedictis · May 1, 2012

...that hummingbird home from the rave, because she's got pretty high tonight.

I only just put down that...

amboyleauthor · May 1, 2012

crossbow; the trigger is still warm from my shooting spree.

That bird outside my window is...

L.J. · May 1, 2012

... a pterodactyl.

Laugh and the world ...

KellyAssauer · May 1, 2012

never hears a thing because I had the windows closed.

If it takes me three hours to cut the yard...

L.J. · May 1, 2012

I'll use a steak knife next time instead of the butter knife.

A Brussels sprout a day...

amboyleauthor · May 1, 2012

gives you green poop.

My dog's left toenail...

KellyAssauer · May 1, 2012

has done as many critiques as you have.

First you fry the newbie, then...

Caitlin Black · May 1, 2012

...you add a garnish of embarrassed moderator, top it off with some cream-of-troll, and you have an AW meal fit for a queen.

The guardian...

Jehhillenberg · May 1, 2012

...is slacking on the job.

Peace goes...

jjdebenedictis · May 1, 2012

...the doves; war goes the hawks; nothing gets done in the school of hard knocks.

Si ma bouche n'est...

Silent Rob · May 2, 2012

...trocken ist, muss ich mehr Bier trinken!

The rain in Spain...

Caitlin Black · May 2, 2012

...is pretty much like rain anywhere, now that I think about it.

Pick...

Silent Rob · May 2, 2012

...a peck of pickled pepper, Peter Piper said, and so I shot him.

She sells sea shells...

Caitlin Black · May 2, 2012

...right outside the crack den, by the seashore.

Never mind the...

KellyAssauer · May 2, 2012

bullocks, pass me the ammunition.

My morning improved when...

amboyleauthor · May 2, 2012

I took a few Valium.

This yogurt tastes...

Charles Farley · May 2, 2012

like fermented lactose.

Since when does . . .

jjdebenedictis · May 2, 2012

...chocolate have eyes?

There are a hundred ravens...