Judy's right, to a point, but remember,
we are readers too.
Just because X book or writer works for some it won't for others.
It doesn't matter if the book's from our time or now, we only justify books published now because it's impossible to ignore entirely, from a market perspective.
But hang with me a bit. We can't please all readers, so doesn't it stand to reason those who are addicted to books by a certain writer, aren't likely the majority of readers who will find the stories you or I like reading and writing ourselves enjoyable to read.
Doesn't mean we can't or won't convert a few, but I'm speaking generally, okay?
I think this "Study other writers" thing works differently for different people, and some like me, just don't find it helpful at all!
It just made you feel shame, but as history tells us again and again, learning, in and of itself should NOT bring shame!
It should and is meant to bring empowerment, and a better understanding of yourself, and others, but sometimes we're so numb from all the pressure, inward and outward, we forget that.
I'm quick to admit I've been guilty of this in the past, and it's still a problem for me, but it's getting better, and I hope you find that solace for yourself soon, Playground King.