Comedy Cabaret--2012 Road Trip

GailD said:

I don't care what kind of date she had. Dawg!! I want those shoes!!

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I...I thought you did care about me. And...and...all the time, you were just after my shoes.

*founces as best she can in four-inch heels*
*reclines fully dressed in tub, drinking Laphroaig, wondering why her shoes have more friends than she does*

I hear a knock at the door and answer.

I am mmediately aware of a large arguing crowd of *gasp* teenagers gathering in front of my neighbor's house.

One of said teenagers is standing before me.

"Is Mr. Cella home?" he says.

My eyes shift. "Yes, what do you need?"

"I wanted to know if I could borrow his BB gun."

KellyAssauer said:

I was afraid of that...

but it seems to me that shoes
out last
both friends and booze.

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Kelly wrotes a poem!

KellyAssauer said:

*checks bar, checks answering machine, checks closet*

I was afraid of that...

but it seems to me that shoes
out last both booze and friends...

Not to worry!

There's always:Cassandra'sShoes.com

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*unfounces, trips over 4-inch heels in the process*

Ouch! Damn shoes!

*removes shoes and flings them across Cabaret*

There! Now people will love me for my sparkling wit and lovable disposition.

Edited to add:

Cella said:

Kelly wrotes a poem!

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When a woman with fabulous shoes
Is suddenly hit by the blues
she probably feels
her friends just love the heels
So she'll drown all her sorrows in booze.

Your turn, Cella!

What are we supposed to do about those feet???

KellyAssauer said:

Easy there Cassie...

You're confusing PD.

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Oh no! Kelly sees through my ruse--
my half-assed attempts to amuse
she's dead-on, I fear
I was never sincere
My main goal was just to confuse.

Hey! This is fun!

But Kelly, enough with the drama
it's not like confusion's a trauma
PD will survive
see? she's still alive!
and pssst....you're missing a comma.

KellyAssauer said:

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Pfft. Amateurs.

KellyAssauer said:

Bored so soon of image surfing?
.

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just cuz it's over fast doesn't mean it's not satisfying.

Cella said:

just cuz it's over fast doesn't mean it's not satisfying.

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quickWit didn't actually manage to SELL you on that, did he?

Cella said:

just cuz it's over fast doesn't mean it's not satisfying.

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Cella's easy...

Rolling Thunder said:

Cella's easy...

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Well, now I know why she's so dang popular. I mean, her shoes aren't that great.

CassandraW said:

quickWit didn't actually manage to SELL you on that, did he?

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it was free, thankyouverrehmuch....

CassandraW said:

her shoes aren't that great.

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GHHUUHH!

You.

Take.

That.

Back.

Cella said:

it was free, thankyouverrehmuch....



GHHUUHH!

You.

Take.

That.

Back.

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*tosses head disdainfully*
*gives middle-school mean girl smirk*

Oh, you mean the shoes were free? I totally believe THAT. They're soooo... March 24th.

Everybody -- look at what Cella's wearing:

...just because I had a coupon...

Cella said:

...just because I had a coupon...

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At LEAST you could have given them a pedicure.

I am NOT giving a coupon a pedicure!

Cella said:

I am NOT giving a coupon a pedicure!

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Ugh! You are IMPOSSIBLE! And you are totally embarrassing me!

*founces*
*stops at shoe store window, mesmerized*

Ohhhhh.... pretty!

CassandraW said:

I wasn't really listening after a while. I was focusing on my Guinness and pulled-pork sandwich, and watching Baylor beat Xavier on the TV just over his right shoulder. The sound was off, or I might've forgotten my manners and shushed him.

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CassandraW said:

Ugh! You are IMPOSSIBLE! And you are totally embarrassing me!

*founces*
*stops at shoe store window, mesmerized*

Ohhhhh.... pretty!

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Angie's gonna be all over those shoes in a minute or so.

Haggis said:

Angie's gonna be all over those shoes in a minute or so.

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yeah, that's my way of calling her.

*waves open bottle of Lagavulin*

just like that's my way of summoning you.

SK would be all over this one.

KellyAssauer said:

Geez...

I don't feel so weird now.

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Me neither.



The storage space in these suckers is awesome. Comes in handy when the thigh holsters are packed full of liquor and barbecue stuff, which is usually.


Edited to add:

Oh! I want the snarly green sneakers! I'm wearing those on my next date!

KellyAssauer said:

Kinda plain... but I lurve my sneakers...

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Your sneakers are cute...but they won't scare my dates like the snarly green ones. Want!

Haggis said:

Angie's gonna be all over those shoes in a minute or so.

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Pff. Those are so two years ago.