Quick question for a story set in China

I wouldn't care either way. If that's how the names would be written, then write them this way. Certainly better than giving them names that feel completely out of place. Could be hard to memorize, but that doesn't matter as long as I know who is who.

You are transliterating Chinese names and words for English-speaking readers. I don't think those tonal marks are there on the Chinese characters, are they? As I understand it, those tonal marks are there to help people learning Chinese to pronounce the words correctly. The pronunciation is not necessary for people reading a story. As a reader, I would find them distracting, especially since they look the same as the long/short marks for vowels.

This is simply my personal reaction I have no idea how an agent would react. How do other authors handle this? I know Jeannie Lin has a series of books set in Tang dynasty China and does not use the tonal marks.

They wouldn't bother me, but I don't think they are standard.

If you're looking for a faster way to add them in, I'd just write the story without them and then find/replace at the very end to add in the marks.

As a reader, it wouldn't bother me (with unfamiliar names, I just go for a general impression of the word, rather than the details), but it would make me crazy if you used two identically spelled words, with different tonal marks, and expected me to tell the difference.
I'd say you can stick them in if it makes you feel more comfortable to spell the words 'properly', and the agent or publisher will tell you if they don't want them. At least they'll know that you know what you're doing. You could do the opposite of the advice above: put them in and find/replace to get rid of them.

As a reader, I want the tonal marks there, even if I don't use them. If I don't want to use them, I can just pronounce the word as I see fit, but if I decide I do want to know what they mean, I can easily find out.

Lil said:

You are transliterating Chinese names and words for English-speaking readers. I don't think those tonal marks are there on the Chinese characters, are they? As I understand it, those tonal marks are there to help people learning Chinese to pronounce the words correctly. The pronunciation is not necessary for people reading a story. As a reader, I would find them distracting, especially since they look the same as the long/short marks for vowels.

This is simply my personal reaction I have no idea how an agent would react. How do other authors handle this? I know Jeannie Lin has a series of books set in Tang dynasty China and does not use the tonal marks.

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Very true. Those accents are only used in a classroom. Never used, or necessary, outside of that.

Stanton said:

Very true. Those accents are only used in a classroom. Never used, or necessary, outside of that.

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Well, they're used whenever you want a reader to know how to pronounce a name.

I wonder if you could use them in a glossary or pronunciation guide instead? I wouldn't find them distracting, but I learned Mandarin at school so understand their purpose. I can see why people who didn't would find them distracting, and why you would be tired of including them after about twice.

I suspect this might also be a stylistic choice made ultimately by a publisher.

I think tonal marks just add WAY too much clutter to words that already kind of intimidate western readers. Even a lot of scholarly works on Chinese subjects dont bother using them (they just include the actual characters).

I think a pronunciation guide would be more helpful. Pinyin uses a lot of Xs and Zs and other letters that western readers arent sure how to deal with.

You could also not use pinyin at all. The Wade-Giles system is obselete, but its still recognizable to western readers, and I think its easier on Western eyes than Pinyin. Personally I prefer it. Pinyin looks ugly. I hate all those Xs and Zs. But thats just me.

I'd find tonal marks wildly distracting. .02.

fwiw, my YA novel uses tonal marks. Neither my agent or the publisher had a problem with that.

A lot of older sources on Chinese history are going to use Wade-Giles (or some other scheme) rather than Pinyin. My main concern would be making sure to use one particular transliteration consistently. Whether or not to use tone marks is up to taste. Written Pinyin as seen in China (mainly in the context of multi-script signage, etc.) tends to leave them off, so I wouldn't worry too much about doing so. I can see how they would be a distraction to your average readers who won't understand the tonal system anyway. They'll have enough work pronouncing all those cs, xs and qs correctly in their minds.

Considering pinyin is mostly just used for teaching students correct pronunciation, I'd say leave them off. It's unlikely the average reader will understand the differentiating tonal marks on already foreign words. Take for example qǐngwèn vs qǐngwěn. What average audience member would pick up on the different meanings they have? I'd think your reader would take whatever you give them. (And a chinese speaker will likely know what you're getting at.)

Anyhow, that's just my two cents.

The purpose of a novel is to entertain people with a story, not to teach a foreign language. I say leave it out. Most readers could care less that a name like Jiang Zi Dan can be pronounced 64 different ways depending on the tones used (four tones, three characters = 4 to the 3rd power = 64 combinations). Cantonese has even more tones.

It's my understanding that pinyin was specifically created to help Russians (Cyrllic alphabet) learn Chinese. Phonetically, it's not the best for English speakers, but was adopted by the People's Republic, and it's use continues to grow as more and more people learn to speak Mandarin.

I've noticed it carries some political baggage for a few of my Taiwan, Hong Kong, and Singapore friends. It's been officially adopted by Singapore and Taiwan, so not sure how widespread that sentiment is.