A Life of Crime and Chocolate

heyjude said:

Nothing. I have a pretty good understanding of the system. Her basic needs are met. She eats, she's clean, she shows up at school. My concerns wouldn't even draw a visit from Children and Youth. It's all about her emotional needs that aren't being met.

I did make sure her teacher knew. And I tell her all the time that she's lovely inside and out and that she's a very special person. I wish I could do more.

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(((HJ))) it is so frustrating when a child is being neglected in such an important area of their well being and nothing can be done. The WHOLE child should be considered, the hidden as well as the seen aspects. There are so many damaged people in our world because their emotional side was not nurtured.

Shakesbear said:

(((HJ))) it is so frustrating when a child is being neglected in such an important area of their well being and nothing can be done. The WHOLE child should be considered, the hidden as well as the seen aspects. There are so many damaged people in our world because their emotional side was not nurtured.

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The problem is, Shakes, here in the US there aren't foster homes for all the kids who are physically neglected, let alone all those whose parents, due to economic happenstance, just don't have the time and energy to help kids with school obligations.

Sad, but given that there are foster parents out there just for the money, foster parents who abuse and even kill the kids, she may actually be in the best place possible.

My kids cousins (who they've never met) on their dad's side are in the foster system. The eldest girl, she was 3 at the time, was sexually abused by one of the other children in the care of the foster carer.

Her father was doing absolutelly everything in his power to try and get the situation sorted but unfortunatelly he passed away before anything could be done.

His 3 children are still in the same home and no one knows where they are. Not that they'd know us or feel any kind of safety when in our company simply because we're strangers to them now.

Glad to hear there are some happy endings out there

Oh, wow. I hope it works out, HJ.


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Well, it looks like I might be getting sick again.

I'm back! What do you mean, stuff has been happening whilst I'm away? Doesn't the world just go on hold?!

Far too many things here to respond to individually. Big hugs all round instead!

Great, thanks! Back to work tomorrow though...

On the bright side, I should be ready to start my rewrite by the end of the month, as long as I can sort out these last few nasty plot tangles... do they do conditioner for stories?

oh hell! Today I was the only teacher in the faculty - every one else was off sick! At the end of the day the head offered me his job. Yeh. really. I said no - still sane! But we had a lot of laughs and a lot of sausage plaits to eat.

Tested!

(P.S. )

heyjude said:

Aha! I have successfully lured darkangel into our fold.

(It worked like a charm, dark. Let me know if you continue to have trouble.)

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Mwahahahahahaha!

Wow. Haha.

Feeling so guilty.
I am responsible for the death of a beautiful bob tailed lizard today (aka blue tongued lizard).
I was walking back from the library and there he was walking across the road about 3 houses down from my place. (It's summer here and they eat snake eggs and baby snakes), I gave him a wide birth but stopped to show my youngest son who was in the pram. The lizard turned around and started to run across the other side of the road. A car pulled out of the drive way and squashed him right in front of our eyes.

If I had of just gone around the other side of him and not stopped to show my son what a cool animal they are, he would still be alive.

I feel so incredibly guilty I could quite easily throw up.




For those of you that dont know what I'm talking about here is the amazing bob tailed lizard.

We used to catch them as kids, my friends and my little brother and I. They have a lock jaw and when they bite they dont let go. When I was 5yo, we went down to the bush and caught one to put in a box as little kids do. my little brother petted it, I wanted to as well. It latched onto my finger lol. I still have the scar today.

My eldest sister made us let him go.

It was so awful.
On the way to pick Blake up from school, I searched for him, but couldnt see him, I couldnt even see a patch on the bitumen where it happened. I had hope that the squelching sound and the little wriggling thing I saw after it happened was just my inagination, but nope, there a few metres away from where it happened was his little battered body all still and lifeless.

I mean you can see from the pictures they arent little. They're a good 20cm long and are really solid for a smallish lizard.
They've got this big solid body supported by these 4 stumpy legs, I've always found it incredible that they can even mouve themselves with them.

Ever since getting bitten as a kid I've had a soft spot for them.

Hugs, French. But you stopped for the very best of reasons, so your son would eventually develop the same appreciation for these creatures as you obviously have. Lizards are very cool.

This is my last easy-going day before I have to start arranging things for the move again. So today I intend to take it easy while I can and do some writing, despite managing to get a chemical burn or something on my finger - no idea how or when or where this happened but it itches like nothing and the annoying thing is I found tons of Savlon and calomine cream etc in the flat when I was clearing out the bathroom cabinet, but left them all in Glasgow so I have nothing to put on it.

I am starting to feel really scared now though, although everything is still coming along nicely. The pets are all booked on the plane and paid for, and the movers seem OK with giving me a day once I get back to Scotland to finish clearing out the old furniture to make way for the new. What worries me is my dad coming over as he has a tendency to panic and to turn nasty when he's scared, and so I'll have to take care of myself and stop him throwing tantrums like a two year old as well. He's actually already started getting flustered about little things so I can see it building up.

I'm reassuring myself with the thought that I have actually organised all this move by myself and done a fairly OK job, and also that both my bosses seem to want to keep me - the one here in Prague has mentioned continuing to pay me so I'll keep writing the blog and web content and stuff and the one in Scotland has apparently been talking about giving me freelance shifts back at the TV studios. So I must be doing something right...

French Maiden said:

If I had of just gone around the other side of him and not stopped to show my son what a cool animal they are, he would still be alive.

I feel so incredibly guilty I could quite easily throw up.

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Hey, hey! Don't feel guilty, French. This was something that was outside of your control. You did not make it run in the direction it did - and you did not make that car come by at that moment.
You probably don't have many dingos in your neighbourhood - but how do you know the poor lizard wasn't going to be caught and tormented by somebody's cat? There could have been a far worse fate in store for it.
When it's time to go, it's best to go quick!

Sheesh, FM. You've been through so much lately. Please don't put yourself through the wringer for this.



Now think of the funniest, dumbest thing you ever did.

And share it with us.

GailD said:

Hey, hey! Don't feel guilty, French. This was something that was outside of your control.

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Zelenka said:

Hugs, French. But you stopped for the very best of reasons, so your son would eventually develop the same appreciation for these creatures as you obviously have. Lizards are very cool.

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Yes to both of these. Fate is a funny thing, and not a one of us can control the universe. I know how you feel - I hate seeing things get hit too - but this is not something you did, or should carry guilt over. You can't know that it wouldn't have been hit anyway.

Lizards are cool. And they are suceptible to the vaguaries of life like all of us.

Zelenka said:

What worries me is my dad coming over as he has a tendency to panic and to turn nasty when he's scared, and so I'll have to take care of myself and stop him throwing tantrums like a two year old as well. He's actually already started getting flustered about little things so I can see it building up.

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I can only commiserate here. I too have a difficult dad (although in a different way). All I can tell you is what you already know: that his tantrums are not because of you, and his meanness is not your fault. You have done an amazing job preparing for and organizing your move, and it stinks that you should have to worry about this, too, when he should be helping.

Zelenka - I've read that moving is one of the most stressful things a person can do in their lifetime. I think you're handling it incredibly well.

Gail - I know I didnt make it happen. I just cant get that image out of my head. The sound of the poor thing going under the wheels is haunting me.

I was talking to my sister about it this morning. She said on her school run with her kids, there was a man re-directing traffic around a bobtail lizard, it made it to the other side of the road and went into the bushes. The man left, the lizard turned around adn got run over by the first car that came along.
She told me that the lizard's number was up, that no matter what happened to try to prevent it from happning, it was meant to pass away on that road. Just as my lizard was meant to today.

I was just thinking of your cats today HJ.
I'm sorry to hear they're not doing so great.
Do you know how much time you have left with them? You've been a fantastic cay Mum to get them to the ripe old age of 17.

heyjude said:

Speaking of almost over, had both cats at the vet today. They're both 17 and failing. The vet was quite alarmed at how the Bug was moving (slowly, painfully).

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I am so sorry to hear this, hj. My folks lost one of their cats a few weeks ago - she was about 17. It is never, ever an easy thing to go through. We have two now, but I still miss my old lady that we lost almost five years ago.