so, i have a novel. it's called Prodigal. it's a pretty darn good thriller:
After a drug-fueled accident costs famous rocker Johnny Riles his left arm and his livelihood, he returns to his small, Alabama hometown to recover, but an affair with his brother's wife threatens to rip him apart all over again -- literally.
A one-night stand with Sarah explodes into something else, something neither of them expected. When Johnny's brother, Aaron, discovers their mistake, he makes one of his own: blinded by his rage, Aaron kills an innocent person. It's a costly error, as a good man watches his world unravel. With Aaron's life in shambles, Johnny knows his brother has one thought: take Johnny and Sarah down with him.
(sorry, that's two grafs taken from my query, just for some background.) i haven't been able to find representation for it. rejections abound (more than 100, at last count). so i submitted it to Amazon's Breakthrough Novel Award ... aaaaaaaaaand didn't make the cut to the quarterfinals. i'm just in shock. i'm pissed. i know this will sound arrogant, but i find it very hard to believe there are 1,000 unpublished novels out there better than mine.
so the hard thing i have to decide is this: do i give up on Prodigal? do i just move on to the next project i'm writing (20,000 words in already) and chalk Prodigal up to just continuing to learn?
maybe i'm just not as good as i think i am, and maybe being a novelist is out of my reach. i was a good reporter, a good editor, a good columnist. i'm used to winning awards. i take a lot of my identity from my writing.
::sigh::
i'm wallowing a bit, i know. but it's so hard to attack the page when you lost the last battle. at this point, i wonder if the war is even worth fighting.
After a drug-fueled accident costs famous rocker Johnny Riles his left arm and his livelihood, he returns to his small, Alabama hometown to recover, but an affair with his brother's wife threatens to rip him apart all over again -- literally.
A one-night stand with Sarah explodes into something else, something neither of them expected. When Johnny's brother, Aaron, discovers their mistake, he makes one of his own: blinded by his rage, Aaron kills an innocent person. It's a costly error, as a good man watches his world unravel. With Aaron's life in shambles, Johnny knows his brother has one thought: take Johnny and Sarah down with him.
(sorry, that's two grafs taken from my query, just for some background.) i haven't been able to find representation for it. rejections abound (more than 100, at last count). so i submitted it to Amazon's Breakthrough Novel Award ... aaaaaaaaaand didn't make the cut to the quarterfinals. i'm just in shock. i'm pissed. i know this will sound arrogant, but i find it very hard to believe there are 1,000 unpublished novels out there better than mine.
so the hard thing i have to decide is this: do i give up on Prodigal? do i just move on to the next project i'm writing (20,000 words in already) and chalk Prodigal up to just continuing to learn?
maybe i'm just not as good as i think i am, and maybe being a novelist is out of my reach. i was a good reporter, a good editor, a good columnist. i'm used to winning awards. i take a lot of my identity from my writing.
::sigh::
i'm wallowing a bit, i know. but it's so hard to attack the page when you lost the last battle. at this point, i wonder if the war is even worth fighting.