Obsessive Rep Point Checkers Club (Volume VI)

Lillian_Blaire

Procrastinator Extraordinaire
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 18, 2016
Messages
38,760
Reaction score
8,775
Location
hanging by a thread
Yeah, Jay—that’s what happens now. He’s found trembling in a corner or whatever, and the other character pieces together what’s happening.
 

Jaymz Connelly

Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 2, 2012
Messages
12,797
Reaction score
2,700
Location
under a rock
Just because something could be seen as cliche doesn't mean you need to remove it. Things are cliche for a reason. It's all in the execution of the cliche.
 

be frank

not a bloke, not named frank
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
10,305
Reaction score
5,270
Location
Melbourne
Website
www.lanifrank.com
This is a big reason why i haven’t been writing. I get overwhelmed and stressed out and shut down.

I know that feeling. The key is to take it one step at a time. I mean, I just rewrote half my bloody book. I almost chucked it in, coz it was overwhelming. Change one aspect, the knock-on effects were paralysing to think about as a writer. But I found if I just focused on one small part then another, without thinking about the overwhelming amount ahead, I rediscovered my enthusiasm as the new thing started to take shape.
 

Jaymz Connelly

Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 2, 2012
Messages
12,797
Reaction score
2,700
Location
under a rock
Yeah, Jay—that’s what happens now. He’s found trembling in a corner or whatever, and the other character pieces together what’s happening.

That sounds good. But don't be afraid to include the flashback if it's relevant. Truly. I think, when you took them all out, you felt the story didn't flow as well. So in this case, go with your gut instinct.

At the end of the day, a beta is offering their opinion. You don't have to take everything they say as incontrovertible truth. Take what you agree with, but feel free to discard what you don't agree with.

- - - Updated - - -

Remember, the beta was only one person. The others didn't have a problem with it. There's every chance your flashback scenes were fine, it just wasn't this particular person's cup of tea. It happens. At the end of the day, it's your book and your story. Take other opinions into account, but trust your gut.

Eek. I just posted the first three sentences of my new shiny. It's been forever since I posted any of my own writing on AW. I'm strangely nervous!

Woot! Way to go on posting the first three! (It's scary, but also fun, eh?)
 

Lillian_Blaire

Procrastinator Extraordinaire
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 18, 2016
Messages
38,760
Reaction score
8,775
Location
hanging by a thread
Thanks guys. Talking this out really helps. I am pretty sure I saved all the flashbacks I took out in a seperate document, so I should be able to add them back in without too much trouble. I need more...meat to the story. More internal dialogue, more background. It’s a good story, in its bones, I know it is. I just need to flesh it out.
 

Lillian_Blaire

Procrastinator Extraordinaire
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 18, 2016
Messages
38,760
Reaction score
8,775
Location
hanging by a thread
I know that feeling. The key is to take it one step at a time. I mean, I just rewrote half my bloody book. I almost chucked it in, coz it was overwhelming. Change one aspect, the knock-on effects were paralysing to think about as a writer. But I found if I just focused on one small part then another, without thinking about the overwhelming amount ahead, I rediscovered my enthusiasm as the new thing started to take shape.
This is good advice. Thanks.

Both of you, thank you. I feel like maybe I can unshelve this thing and make it the story I want it to be.
 

Jaymz Connelly

Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 2, 2012
Messages
12,797
Reaction score
2,700
Location
under a rock
Thanks guys. Talking this out really helps. I am pretty sure I saved all the flashbacks I took out in a seperate document, so I should be able to add them back in without too much trouble. I need more...meat to the story. More internal dialogue, more background. It’s a good story, in its bones, I know it is. I just need to flesh it out.

Always happy to talk things out about writing, or pretty much anything. :) I bet it's an awesome story. Just get those flashbacks put back in place and write the story YOU want to tell! You can do it! :e2cheer:
 

Lillian_Blaire

Procrastinator Extraordinaire
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 18, 2016
Messages
38,760
Reaction score
8,775
Location
hanging by a thread
lol. Here. (The password is vista, same as SYW).

Yay for unshelving, Lil. :) Is this the MS you had in QLH a while back?
I found it!!

Yes, this is THE ms.

- - - Updated - - -

Always happy to talk things out about writing, or pretty much anything. :) I bet it's an awesome story. Just get those flashbacks put back in place and write the story YOU want to tell! You can do it! :e2cheer:

Thanks, Jay. I appreciate the vote of confidence.
 

be frank

not a bloke, not named frank
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
10,305
Reaction score
5,270
Location
Melbourne
Website
www.lanifrank.com
Oh good. I thought that MS had real potential. :)

Ack! I just realized I need to make an anniversary card for Mr. BF. Totally forgot. (About the card, not our anniversary).
 

Lillian_Blaire

Procrastinator Extraordinaire
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 18, 2016
Messages
38,760
Reaction score
8,775
Location
hanging by a thread
Okay guys, it’s past my bedtime. Thanks again for your help. Have a great day!! :kiss:

- - - Updated - - -

Oh good. I thought that MS had real potential. :)

Ack! I just realized I need to make an anniversary card for Mr. BF. Totally forgot. (About the card, not our anniversary).
oh, thanks!

Happy Anniversary! Coming up. How many years, BF?
 

be frank

not a bloke, not named frank
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
10,305
Reaction score
5,270
Location
Melbourne
Website
www.lanifrank.com
Goodnight, Lil!

Happy Anniversary! Coming up. How many years, BF?

Tomorrow. And it depends when you count from. 14 years since our first date, 5 since we actually bothered to get married.

BF - he's got you, why does he need a card? :D

So true! His card is also his present. The card is just basically gonna say "Yes."

I trust he will understand that this is the answer to the question he's asked every day for the last couple of years. (Have you finished the book yet??)
 

be frank

not a bloke, not named frank
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
10,305
Reaction score
5,270
Location
Melbourne
Website
www.lanifrank.com
Thanks. :)

Hmm, my stomach is telling me it needs food.

*checks time*

Yep, that explains it!
 

Jaymz Connelly

Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 2, 2012
Messages
12,797
Reaction score
2,700
Location
under a rock
Yep past lunchtime.

I gotta head out in a few to take paperwork to the hosp.
 

be frank

not a bloke, not named frank
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
10,305
Reaction score
5,270
Location
Melbourne
Website
www.lanifrank.com
That sounds like fun. Not.

I'm fooded now. My tummy's less grumbly. But it needs more coffee...
 

BryanT

Do I have to?
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jun 8, 2017
Messages
1,454
Reaction score
501
Location
A little to the left of hell
Sounds like a hassle, BF. Sorry.

Okay, I have a writing question. How do you, personally, feel about flashbacks in a book? Originally in my ms, my MC had PTSD that caused flashbacks. It was through those flashbacks that the reader learned about the character’s past, what happened, why he was so screwed up. I had some beta readers who liked it, but one in particular said it broke up the story too much, pulled her out of the story. So I took them all out. The problem is, it left the character feeling one-dimensional to me. And then I ended up sort of info-dumping his story. I’m unhappy with the results.

Any opinions? I’m just curious what you guys think of books that flashback or perhaps have an alternating timeline. I want to add the flashbacks back into the story and make it work. But is that stupid? Can it work? I dunno...

Sometimes, when there are to many flashbacks, it can be disruptive, unless you are tying the flashback to a plot point that you want to emphasize. In my current WP, I have incorporated flashbacks a few times. The second being a reveal of an ability, as well as a glimpse in to the MCs past.

Flashbacks have never bothered me unless they were unimportant — If I’m left feeling why did I just read this, then yes it will snap me out of space. The Beta read I am doing also uses flashbacks effectively. Much of his are tied to character development as well as plot point emphasis.

:) I hope this helps.
 

BryanT

Do I have to?
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jun 8, 2017
Messages
1,454
Reaction score
501
Location
A little to the left of hell
Thanks, Jay. Yeah, I felt they happened pretty naturally, you know. But it’s hard to know what advice to take from betas and what to ignore.

In the end, it is your story. You take what resonates, and discard the rest. But if a few come back with the same suggestion, it is worth reviewing why it has to be the way you have put it.

I think I read somewhere in the last 22 pages you guys have written tonight that only one person of the betas had issue with the flashbacks? It would take a whole lot more than that to make me do that kind of alteration, and even then I think I would leave some of them in.

:e2bear:
 

Jaymz Connelly

Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 2, 2012
Messages
12,797
Reaction score
2,700
Location
under a rock
In the end, it is your story. You take what resonates, and discard the rest. But if a few come back with the same suggestion, it is worth reviewing why it has to be the way you have put it.

I think I read somewhere in the last 22 pages you guys have written tonight that only one person of the betas had issue with the flashbacks? It would take a whole lot more than that to make me do that kind of alteration, and even then I think I would leave some of them in.

:e2bear:

Exactly!
 

Jaymz Connelly

Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 2, 2012
Messages
12,797
Reaction score
2,700
Location
under a rock
That sounds like fun. Not.

I'm fooded now. My tummy's less grumbly. But it needs more coffee...

It was actually pretty quick. No queue at all and we got a park almost right outside the hospital. It took longer to go to the grocery store (because we forgot we needed to go until we were about to swap cars around again).

Yay for less grumbly tummy!
 

be frank

not a bloke, not named frank
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
10,305
Reaction score
5,270
Location
Melbourne
Website
www.lanifrank.com
Sorry, got all busy. Then got all enthused to go for a run before dinner ... then twisted my ankle really badly. Because apparently standing up is a dangerous activity for me. Sigh.

Yeah, given my foot's throbbing and it's kinda hard to walk, I don't think that run's gonna happen. Sigh.

Good job on the fast hospital visit! That makes it a bit more palatable. :)
 

Jaymz Connelly

Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 2, 2012
Messages
12,797
Reaction score
2,700
Location
under a rock
Oh, ouch! Who knew standing up could be so tricksy, eh? I hope your ankle feels much better soon.

Yes, very happy that it was a quick trip to the hospital and back.