Limericks Live!

These Lim'ricks are gen'rally bad
We're lacking in talent. It's sad.
If it weren't just for you
This thread we'd eschew
But we don't and for that, I am glad!

There once was a lady so soft

There once was a lady so soft
One step would propel her aloft

There once was a lady so soft
One step would propel her aloft
She'd float for a while

There once was a lady so soft
One step would propel her aloft
She'd float for a while
Then descend with a smile

There once was a lady so soft
One step would propel her aloft
She'd float for a while
Then descend with a smile
To her garden, where roses bloomed oft.

If I had my druthers, "gone fishing"

If I had my druthers, "gone fishing"
I'd be fly casting, all the while wishing

If I had my druthers, "gone fishing"
I'd be fly casting, all the while wishing
the hook hadn't caught

If I had my druthers, "gone fishing"
I'd be fly casting, all the while wishing
the hook hadn't caught
In a sensitive spot

If I had my druthers, "gone fishing"
I'd be fly casting, all the while wishing
the hook hadn't caught
In a sensitive spot
And that's what we call Derping.

Fred frocked to feel pope-y

Shirokirie said:

If I had my druthers, "gone fishing"
I'd be fly casting, all the while wishing
the hook hadn't caught
In a sensitive spot
And that's what we call Derping.

Fred frocked to feel pope-y

Click to expand...

Shirokirie, there's no way "derping" can rhyme with "fishing."

If I had my druthers, "gone fishing"
I'd be fly casting, all the while wishing
the hook hadn't caught
In a sensitive spot
Now Spam is the stuff we'll be dishing.

Also, "Fred frocked to feel pope-y" doesn't have enough beats.

Fred frocked all in white to feel pope-y

Fred frocked all in white to feel pope-y
But everyone said he looked dopey

Fred frocked all in white to feel pope-y
But everyone said he looked dopey
So he changed his socks

Fred frocked all in white to feel pope-y
But everyone said he looked dopey
So he changed his socks
Which smelled like an ox

Fred frocked all in white to feel pope-y
But everyone said he looked dopey
So he changed his socks
Which smelled like an ox
And sat around looking all mopey

These newbies are making me crazy

These newbies are making me crazy
Their brains are deplorably lazy

These newbies are making me crazy
Their brains are deplorably lazy
Their queries are dumb

These newbies are making me crazy
Their brains are deplorably lazy
Their queries are dumb
They chew bubble gum

These newbies are making me crazy
Their brains are deplorably lazy
Their queries are dumb
They chew bubble gum
like goons in a Martin Scorsese

There was a young fella named Vinnie

There was a young fella named Vinnie
Who married a woman named Minnie

There was a young fella named Vinnie
Who married a woman named Minnie
They lived in a shack

There was a young fella named Vinnie
Who married a woman named Minnie
They lived in a shack
With a dog named Zak

There was a young fella named Vinnie
Who married a woman named Minnie
They lived in a shack
With a dog called Zak
Whose behavior was really quite spinny.


My Bonnie lies over the ocean

Ooofff! We got a twofer!

Let's combine the two, thus:

There was a young fella named Vinnie
Who married a woman named Minnie
They lived in a shack
With a dog called Zak-Jack
That ate chocolate and stayed very skinny.

The end of the world is at hand!

My bonnie lies over the ocean
She rubs on grape jam as a lotion



The end of the world is at hand
I'll go lie on the beach and the sand

My bonnie lies over the ocean
She rubs on grape jam as a lotion
She's delightfully sweet

The end of the world is at hand
I'll go lie on the beach and the sand
If it's all going to end