Query dissimilar to synopsis. Problem?

DeaK

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Hi everyone.

ETA: It's now half an hour later, and I retain no illusion that I can leave my submission package as is. This was just the kick in the pants I needed. Thank you, wise AWers!

I'm just about ready to start querying, having completed the manuscript, synopsis and query. However, as I dusted off my query, which I wrote way back in the summer (I think it was), I noticed that Wait – this includes a subplot that I cut from the synopsis in favour of clarity and brevity. The synopsis is still 1000 words, and was very difficult for me to write.

My question: If you received a query that presented a certain subplot, but then the synopsis didn't include that subplot, what would you think? Would it be a problem?

I had to cut quite a bit of plot from my synopsis (and I think that's okay), but now I have this query letter that kind of presents the book from a different angle.

You may see me in QLH once again :cry:but I'm kind of hoping not.
 
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Old Hack

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I think if your query reads like it's talking about one book but your synopsis reads like it's talking about a different book you might find that it confuses agents, and puts them off.

If I were you I'd synchronise them with one another.
 

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It would seem really odd to a reader that your query would include something that isn't in the synopsis. The synopsis is longer, and one would think that anything important enough to make it to the query would be in the synopsis too. Are you sure it's needed in the query?
 

DeaK

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I think if your query reads like it's talking about one book but your synopsis reads like it's talking about a different book you might find that it confuses agents, and puts them off.

If I were you I'd synchronise them with one another.

That was quick. I'll heed your advice, Old Hack. Thank you.

Back to work for me.
 

Torgo

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I think it would make more sense to cut a subplot from the query for space reasons, but retain it in the synopsis, than the other way round. If I'd seen the query and requested the synopsis, I'd assume you'd cut the subplot and forgotten to remove from the query (which wouldn't make you look very organized.)
 

DeaK

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It would seem really odd to a reader that your query would include something that isn't in the synopsis. The synopsis is longer, and one would think that anything important enough to make it to the query would be in the synopsis too. Are you sure it's needed in the query?

No, I think I can write a query without it. I just felt like... I was done, you know? Never done, of course. Thanks.
 

DeaK

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I think it would make more sense to cut a subplot from the query for space reasons, but retain it in the synopsis, than the other way round.

Yeah, I know. It read well in the query because it upped the stakes really fast without having to resolve the plot lines. Then adding it into the synopsis it was just a sidetrack and very difficult to present in a clear fashion.

If I'd seen the query and requested the synopsis, I'd assume you'd cut the subplot and forgotten to remove from the query (which wouldn't make you look very organized.)

Yeah, I don't want that. Thanks!
 

tko

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a short example

Some agents are really fun, generous, and open. Others are a mite more picky.

I submitted the 1st 50 and a query to an agent. In the query I mentioned that an "email lures Dan back to MIT."

The agent commented that was wrong. "The email causes someone to call Dan which lures him back to MIT."

In the interest of keeping the query simple I simplified the chain of event, but evidently it bothered this one agent.
 

CAWriter

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Glad you're going to tighten it up. It's a good habit to get into maintaining consistency in your writing. I read a book with my sons that had something in the title like "Don't Sit on My Lunch," along with cover art to match. When we were finished with the book we were all a little perplexed because, as funny as the rest of the book was, we never could figure out what the title had to do with anything.