Return of a Man Named PAMB and its Quotes

Gillhoughly

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I'm going to a funeral next week of a dear, dear wonderful man who died much too young. If some bonehead tried to sell his damned books at THAT one he'd find himself being buried as well. His life-long friends wouldn't stand for such a disrespectful, disgusting thing. He would disappear quietly, but he would disappear. (They're "connected.") Danged skippy, I'd HELP them, too!

Thankfully this moron would require cooperation from a funeral director to set up, and it would never happen. If he tried that in the South he'll get his arse whupped, if not shot off. We take funerals very seriously here.

Now I've called the local coroner to ask research questions, and they've been helpful, but to ask them if I could set up a book signing???

See above about arse-whupping and shooting, but such an indecency would never have occurred to me. I know we're not supposed to slam PA writers, but good God, that's just WRONG, and I know other PA writers would agree.
 

Jersey Chick

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Why on earth would you want to do a signing at a morgue in the first place? The most captive of the audience are DEAD!?!?!? And who hangs around a funeral home (aside from the people who work there) unless there is a wake? And if there is a wake going on, what are the odds that someone doing a book signing there would not get the crap kicked out of them for being an insensitive clod?
 

scully931

So you're suggesting what? Bigfoot?
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I don't like it when people say 'literally' but don't really mean it. But my jaw literally dropped open when I read that one.
 

M.R.J. Le Blanc

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You know, I always try to feel sorry for these PA writers because they're so misguided and desperate they'll try anything. But that was an entire lapse of common sense. I hope if that person ever actually did try it, he/she got the chewing out they deserved.
 

ChristineR

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"Oh, hi! I see you're here for a funeral, and your loved one was murdered! I have a book you might be interested in. You see, it's a murder mystery I wrote, and I was very sensitive to the agonizing pain the dead man's family felt!"
 

TheTinCat

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Hmm?

Yesterday, my first book was no longer available to be sold on B&N.com and today I found that my second book is no longer available. I have checked a few other PA authors and it appears they are no longer being sold on B&N.com.

I find that most of my sales come from B&N.com and this really concerns me. Is PA having some issue with B&N? How is it possible that a print-on-demand book would not be available via B&N.com? Unless there is some issue, it doesn't make sense. Anybody hear anything? I have not received any info from PA as we did during the Amazon dispute.

So what you're saying is that your book isn't even "available through" Barnes & Nobles anymore?

But at least they're sticking to their promise never to charge any fees or pressure authors to buy their own books!
 

ChristineR

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I suspect this is some sort of glitch involving their transfer from self-printing to Baker and Taylor. Since Ingrams was doing their distribution before, possibly their listing with Books in Print/ISBN instructed stores who actually wanted a book to contact Ingrams, who would contact PA, who would print the book and ship it to Ingrams, who would ship it to the bookstore. Now they have to contact Baker and Taylor.

I think it likely that B & N can get POD books printed by Baker and Taylor, even if the database doesn't say so. Not that PA is known for their administrative genius.
 

Marian Perera

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This is from a PA author's blog.

I'm so ready 4 a new publisher. PA hasn't been bad to me but definitely leaves a lot to be desired. I requested my cover for <title of sequel> to look something like the cover of <title of first novel> so that you could tell that they were in the same series and it doesn't look like that's going to happen, I'm so not happy. Not crazy about the cover at all. Trying to get them to change it, I'll let you guys know.
sad.gif
Also, they made a few errors and I'm trying to have them correct it but it's not going well. Sucks. Can't wait to be with a publisher who cares what the author wants....

IMO, it's not so much about what the author wants as what makes the book marketable. What sells. If the sequel's cover has elements in common with that of the first book in the series, readers will recognize it more easily. Likewise, editing and copyediting isn't so much to satisfy the author - I know I griped my way through mine, though not of course to my editor - but to make sure the final product can compete with all the other books out there.

Anyways, <title of sequel> is nearing completion, 4 better or 4 worse, the story is dear to me and is in my opinion better than the first regardless of its (PA's publishing) flaws. Oh, well. Hopefully the fans I do have will follow me to a better publisher.

The author mentions on the same webpage that she's sent a different book to Walker & Co. The book seems like a YA fantasy, with the main character being a "shifter". I glanced at Walker's submission guidelines which said "[FONT=georgia,palatino,times,serif]We do not publish folk tales, fairy tales, textbooks, myths, legends, books in series format, novelties, science fiction, fantasy, or horror.[/FONT]"
 

TheTinCat

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IMO, it's not so much about what the author wants as what makes the book marketable.

And I think this is the downfall of many of the people on the PAMB: They seem to get it turned around in their heads so they come to believe that publishing should be about the author. About fulfilling their dream.

The first time I saw the PA website I couldn't help wonder how it could not ring any bells with people that the "publisher's" motto had to do with the authors (we treat our authors the old fashioned way, etc). I thought it would be fairly obvious that the publishing business was about selling books to readers, not about pleasing the writers.

But if someone gets their desire to be published confused with the purpose of publishing, then it would only make sense I guess.
 

PVish

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A few more authors have noticed the disappearance of their books from B&N:
. . . I just got on barnandnobles site and my book was gone too. Are we losing our books on the online book stores? Thats where I get most of my sells too. Can someone help us?
and
A friend of mine just told me that he ordered my second book, [title redacted], from B&N.com Saturday (my first book had not been available Saturday for purchase on B&N.com) and he received an email today from B&N.com that the order had been cancelled.
Maybe we will be advised why this is happening. I guess we have to stay tuned.
Meanwhile, someone wonders why no word about the e-books:
PA Moderator..
Haven't heard one word about the E Book
deal ? What's up?
 

circlexranch

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Regarding the funeral home book signings . . .

My husband spent the first twenty years of his career in the funeral industry and one of our best friends is a funeral director.

Those in the industry are EXTREMELY (bold faced and underlined) touchy about the dignity of their profession and would not tolerate anything that even hinted at making a farce of that industry.

If it was even suggested . . . oh my . . .
 

Gillhoughly

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That's very reassuring to know. Thank you for posting that.

Good grief, the last thing my still in shock mom needed when she was burying my dad was dealing with some moron trying to sell books. How utterly heartless.

It was a great help at how kindly and respectful the people at the funeral home were toward us, and I've always returned the favor.

In every culture across the globe, there is always something in place about respecting the dead and against stealing from the dead. I guess that moron just didn't get the memo. I'd like to personally deliver it to him/her.

With a brick.

Dear PA Lurkers
--this post is aimed at one specific individual, NOT at PA writers in general. I'm sure you're in full agreement about the fact that attempting to sell books--any books regardless of who wrote and printed them--at a funeral is absolutely over the line.
 
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Momento Mori

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Great. Now I have the mental image of an overly-enthusiastic author barging into an open casket funeral and using the dearly departed to prop up their book while they do their sales spiel.

I need some brain bleach.

MM
 

JulieB

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I would like to think the author was overly-enthusiastic at the time of the post and thought the better of it later. Sadly, he/she could not have gone back and edited their post.
 

TheTinCat

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I'd like to think the whole peddling-books-at-funerals-thing was a joke.

Not a funny one, though.
 

spike

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I'd like to think the whole peddling-books-at-funerals-thing was a joke.

Not a funny one, though.

The author did say "funeral homes", not "funerals". I choose to believe he wanted to go there on a day when there wasn't a funeral scheduled and talk the director into having some sort of open house type thing, with the author as the featured guest. Not a brilliant idea, but a lot nicer than the alternative.

I could be wrong, but I don't want to think about anyone being so crass and unfeeling.

And we here in the North take funerals very seriously too.
 

Marian Perera

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The author who said that she was ready for another publisher posted a new blog entry.

Publisher says they will implement corrections...

This was for the errors in the text that were caused by PA in the first place. I won't hold my breath - PA saying something will be done isn't exactly the same as that thing actually being done.

won't change cover unless I pay out my butt for a re-design...hmmm...I think that this Monday officially goes down in the books as one of the most screwed up in history.

I checked out the cover, and it's, well, not great. There don't even seem to be characters on it, let alone an indication of genre or a link to the first book in the series (other than the title spelling this out). Even the fonts don't match that of the first book, and that would be relatively easy to do.

On the PAMB, the thread on royalties is predictably sad - even before anyone has received a check. The latest is from a veteran who seems to swallow every claim of PA's.

Last year that happened to me once regarding not even getting an email statement from them. I got an email for my first book but not for the second. I had to email them and allert them I did not recieve anything for one of my books and they resent the email to me but before I did I was waiting and looking for a check no matter how small from them. I get small payments when I sale one of my copies to someone and lately that seems to be the only way I have been able to make a little money off my books. No matter what I do or how hard I work on promoting my books it is hard to get someone to make a meaningful splurge on a book lately.

I don't think there's any happy ending for the people who hang in there, believing that if they're just loyal enough or if they just do a little more promotion, things will work out and they'll actually "make a little money".
 

TheTinCat

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IMO it's not really that much better than the alternative ...

It would be extremely inappropriate to push books on any people you might meet at a funeral home. I mean, it's not like anyone goes there just to hang out or browse, you know?

A dying person goes to look into making their own arrangements in advance, and some twat then jumps out and shoves a book in their face, insisting that they should buy it because "It has someone in it who dies! You know, just like you? Give me money!".

That's still pretty unfeeling in my eyes.
 

TheTinCat

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From the royalties thread:

for the last pay period in August I did not even receive an email or any statement at all! I was very dissapointed. I hope this one is different and I at least get something in terms of information of ANY activity.
I've been working hard with promotions and I hope there'll be results.
In general though I think everything moves slow. I still have not received my author's copy of my book (it's been a looong time), my release emails have not gone out, the postcard page is not available yet.... Sad
Anyway, I'll wait and see what happens.

It's a little heartbreaking that so many of them really only ask for very little to be happy, but even "very little" is desperately hard to come by with PA.
 

HistorySleuth

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Honestly, I don't know how you can stomach reading their forum boards on a regular basis. All these authors at PA complain, where are my proofs? Where is my order? So and so ordered books 2 months ago and never got them. Where is my royalty statement? Etc. Etc. I see a lot of, "Oh, well I guess I will just wait and see." It is so sad. Then PA tosses them a crumb, and they grovel with thanks. It really sickens me, these poor authors.
 

Cyia

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Another post went up on the Barnes&Noble thread after Infocenter posted to blame everything on the switch from Ingrams:

FYI...We've encountered some problems selling our book via B&N, only the book still shows up but is listed as "out of stock". We've had phone calls from people who went to a B&N store to place an order only to be told that this particular book was "blocked".

Like a previous "poster", most of our sales are via B&N...hope this gets straightened out ASAP. Computer savvy folks just go over to Amazon or PA itself and place the order(s) there; it is the non-technical people who are not comfortable ordering via the web (and drive over to their local B&N) whose sales we don't want to miss out on.
 

HistorySleuth

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Wow. wouldn't they waste their gas to "drive over to their local B&N". They wouldn't find them actually in the stores would they? Or do they mean walk in the store and order it through B&N?
 

Cyia

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Another one who didn't know what she was getting into:

Hi, if someone could be so kind as to tell me what I need to do. I have a few questions.

First, is it up to us to notify the newspaper that there is a new author in town?

Second, Last week I received my cover and okayed it. I want to buy some books but I can not afford to buy bunches of them. How to I buy my book ? Also, when your book comes out do people have to order them or can they go to B&N and just buy the book?
 

kaitie

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Wow. wouldn't they waste their gas to "drive over to their local B&N". They wouldn't find them actually in the stores would they? Or do they mean walk in the store and order it through B&N?

Nope, they mean ordering it through the store. The thing is, the only people who would do this are family or close friends anyway because no one else would know the book exists, so if that was the case you might as well tell them how to order it online or buy it yourself and give it to them (or have them reimburse you, I guess).

Would it be possible for B&N or Amazon to refuse to stock anything from this publisher? I've wondered that before. Granted, I'm sure to them if they get a percentage of a sale they don't really care where it came from, but it has occurred to me before that it would be nice if they would refuse to carry books from such a disreputable publisher. If so, I bet a lot more people would choose not to have their books with PA in the first place. This might actually be a blessing in disguise, even if they do get it sorted out.

Does anyone else feel like the past few months have been watching the start of the downward spiral and there's no coming back up? Desperate ads, moving to a new location, books not being sent, extra charges, and now this?
 

Marian Perera

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Does anyone else feel like the past few months have been watching the start of the downward spiral and there's no coming back up? Desperate ads, moving to a new location, books not being sent, extra charges, and now this?

There have been several times in the last few years when it's seemed as though PA's in trouble - for instance, when notices went out about the 1-900 number - but they keep going. Just like herpes. As long as there are naive and desperate people, there will be cons and scams.