If I can't get this analysis to at least 1K, which is looking very likely at the moment, I don't know what I'll do...
Teens Writing for Teens, issue 6
- Thread starter It's-Magic!
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Karla- But despite how absolutely horribly that hurt, you found love and happiness again. When someone is murdered, it is for good, and that person is gone from the world forever. If they have children, they end up with a single parent or orphaned. The rest of their family can never see or talk to them again. And the worst part is, the person who murdered honestly plotted to cause pain.
While cheating is bad and cruel, it a) does not actually end lives- the person cheated on still has a future, and b) it is done out of selfish reasons. That does not make it okay, and it's still bad, but it's not evil the way plotting a way to cause a person unbearable physical pain and end their existence is.
That's the way I see it. Also, I know people who have cheated, and while it's wrong and bad and cruel, they're not evil, and there are usually a lot of reasons behind it, and usually is a lot more complex.
While cheating is bad and cruel, it a) does not actually end lives- the person cheated on still has a future, and b) it is done out of selfish reasons. That does not make it okay, and it's still bad, but it's not evil the way plotting a way to cause a person unbearable physical pain and end their existence is.
That's the way I see it. Also, I know people who have cheated, and while it's wrong and bad and cruel, they're not evil, and there are usually a lot of reasons behind it, and usually is a lot more complex.
I agree that murder is worse than cheating, but I also agree that cheating is a terrible act.
It destroys the people and, often, families that are involved. My aunt cheated on my uncle which resulted in their divorce. My cousin was 13 at the time. The mental implications of cheating can be extensive because it causes that person's significant other/children to question why that person cheated and whether it was something they did.
It destroys the people and, often, families that are involved. My aunt cheated on my uncle which resulted in their divorce. My cousin was 13 at the time. The mental implications of cheating can be extensive because it causes that person's significant other/children to question why that person cheated and whether it was something they did.
Oh, yes, it's a terrible act WHEN IT'S ADULTERY or an equivalent. I don't think someone tearing their family apart in their thirties or forties is the same as a 16-year-old with a boyfriend kissing someone else as a party. I say ADULTERY is a really terrible act, but I don't view adultery and cheating as the same thing.
I see cheating as among teens or college-aged kids, and adultery as among adults in adult relationships. Totally different in my mind. Cheating is cheating, adultery is an affair.
I see cheating as among teens or college-aged kids, and adultery as among adults in adult relationships. Totally different in my mind. Cheating is cheating, adultery is an affair.
I'm definitely not saying cheating IS as bad as murdering someone. I'm saying, at least for me and Ally, it FEELS that way when it happened. Yes, I do know cheating and murdering someone are two worlds apart. But your heart only desires love. So if that love is gone because of the other person cheating, it's srsly like they stabbed you in the heart.
That's the comparison for me. It may be grandiose I suppose, but that's how it is for me. And probably Ally too.
That's the comparison for me. It may be grandiose I suppose, but that's how it is for me. And probably Ally too.
Hm, I suppose. (though I'm gonna be a cynical little thing and say 'NOT THAT YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO BE STABBED IT THE HEART because that would also break your ribcage, it's much easier to kill by stabbing the throat'... not that I know anything about that, oh no)
But I think it depends on how serious the relationship is. I generally don't take relationships under, like, 21 years of age very seriously, because the brain hasn't fully developed yet anyway. (It doesn't finish developing until age 23, which is what I consider adulthood).
No, I sometimes take college relationships seriously. 25/75 in first year, 50/50 in second and third, 75/25 in final year. High school relationships, I don't take seriously. I mean, I believe people do fall in love and when they break up it is really painful and horrible, but I don't ever expect the relationship to go anywhere and I'm 99% sure you'll get over it.
ETA: I also don't place much stock at all in romantic love, because I don't think being IN love with someone is as strong as simply loving someone. I think love is love, whether it's parental or sibling or friendship or romantic. Any can be strongest, but it's up for grabs.
And of course, I generally assume the love a parent has for their child (specifically mothers) is the strongest love of all.
But I think it depends on how serious the relationship is. I generally don't take relationships under, like, 21 years of age very seriously, because the brain hasn't fully developed yet anyway. (It doesn't finish developing until age 23, which is what I consider adulthood).
No, I sometimes take college relationships seriously. 25/75 in first year, 50/50 in second and third, 75/25 in final year. High school relationships, I don't take seriously. I mean, I believe people do fall in love and when they break up it is really painful and horrible, but I don't ever expect the relationship to go anywhere and I'm 99% sure you'll get over it.
ETA: I also don't place much stock at all in romantic love, because I don't think being IN love with someone is as strong as simply loving someone. I think love is love, whether it's parental or sibling or friendship or romantic. Any can be strongest, but it's up for grabs.
And of course, I generally assume the love a parent has for their child (specifically mothers) is the strongest love of all.
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I believe the emotions are roughly the same with cheating and adultery. So, to me, that makes them the same. Different effects, yes, but those emotions are still really powerful. And I can certainly see how those emotions can maybe even feel AS powerful to teens and young adults as to adults when dealing with adultery.
I feel very strongly when it comes to matters of the heart. Like...to the extreme.
It's my favorite thing in the world.
It definitely depends on how serious it it. It also depends on the person.
I see myself as an emotional person. Before, I used to hate just HOW emotional I can get. But recently, I realized it's part of what makes me so passionate about certain things. It's easy for me to get moved by inspiring/emotional stories, and I like that about myself. That I can tear up and/or get a light feeling in my head with just a feeling of amazement when reading stories or watching it on TV.
Lol, that's where we're opposites. I could care less.
Nah, not really, but romance doesn't mean any more to me than any other emotion. Love means more, but romantic love is... ehh.
Case in point: My paranomal romance WIP- only story I've ever thought up with a romance as an A storyline- is about a relationship that descends into being ridiculously unhealthy and borderline abusive, and ends with my main girl dumping his ass.
I care about love and romantic love, but it doesn't matter nearly as much to me as other things. Most of my stories are way more about friendship.
Don't get me wrong: done right, I love romance. But I find most romances really lackluster. I will cry on Doomsday, but Titanic didn't matter to me 'cause I couldn't stop giggling over the stuntwork. I care about Brittana and Amy/Rory, and I ship Doctor/Master like crazy, and there's a couple in Sherlockettes I love to death, but I... don't care that much about romance.
Let's put it this way: I started thinking about breaking up with my last boyfriend the day he told me he loved me. I dumped him because he was too affectionate and a bad kisser.
I can be romantic-minded, but I would way rather read about murder and death than romance. I basically skipped the cave chapters of the Hunger Games, because they made me want to be sick.
ETA: The funny thing is, I'm a highly emotional person. I care a lot about everything... EVERYTHING. But I'm a pretty face and a great ass, and I know how to use it and flirt with it, but if I guy gets attached to anything more than that I hightail it out of there.
Nah, not really, but romance doesn't mean any more to me than any other emotion. Love means more, but romantic love is... ehh.
Case in point: My paranomal romance WIP- only story I've ever thought up with a romance as an A storyline- is about a relationship that descends into being ridiculously unhealthy and borderline abusive, and ends with my main girl dumping his ass.
I care about love and romantic love, but it doesn't matter nearly as much to me as other things. Most of my stories are way more about friendship.
Don't get me wrong: done right, I love romance. But I find most romances really lackluster. I will cry on Doomsday, but Titanic didn't matter to me 'cause I couldn't stop giggling over the stuntwork. I care about Brittana and Amy/Rory, and I ship Doctor/Master like crazy, and there's a couple in Sherlockettes I love to death, but I... don't care that much about romance.
Let's put it this way: I started thinking about breaking up with my last boyfriend the day he told me he loved me. I dumped him because he was too affectionate and a bad kisser.
I can be romantic-minded, but I would way rather read about murder and death than romance. I basically skipped the cave chapters of the Hunger Games, because they made me want to be sick.
ETA: The funny thing is, I'm a highly emotional person. I care a lot about everything... EVERYTHING. But I'm a pretty face and a great ass, and I know how to use it and flirt with it, but if I guy gets attached to anything more than that I hightail it out of there.
Tally: But wouldn't you honestly love it if you'd been going out with a guy for a long time and he told he loved you?
ETA: Finished the coursework for tomorrow. To be honest, I tried my best and that's all I can do at the end of the day.
ETA: Finished the coursework for tomorrow. To be honest, I tried my best and that's all I can do at the end of the day.
Um, maybe. If it was, like, a LONG time. I mean, at the very very least six months, and only if I loved him, and trust me, that is no easy feat for me.
I'd be fine after a year and a half, if we were still dating. Okay, maybe I wouldn't be.
But I've always been of the opinion that friends are much more important than boyfriends in shaping who you are. At least, they should be.
I'd be fine after a year and a half, if we were still dating. Okay, maybe I wouldn't be.
But I've always been of the opinion that friends are much more important than boyfriends in shaping who you are. At least, they should be.
I SECOND THAT.
I love having guy friends. And I'd sooner have loads of them that I love and care about, then a boyfriend simply because I want one and go for anyone, which is what some girls do, sadly.
I love having guy friends. And I'd sooner have loads of them that I love and care about, then a boyfriend simply because I want one and go for anyone, which is what some girls do, sadly.
Since i was away at class... Well i'll catch up on my feelings on the issues discussed now.
1) Yes murder is drastically different from cheating but it can hurt a person just as much. Being cheated on makes you want to die yourself at times. It can destroy a person mentally. Now i'm not saying cheaters should go to jail or something I'm just saying in my opinion the act of cheating is just as bad, for the amount of damage it can cause a person, or families.
2) Cheating and Adultery are the same thing. If you are in a serious relationship, no matter the age, and you love someone with everything you have and then they go and cheat on you, it doesn't matter if your 15 or 93, its going to hurt the same. It also depends on the level of cheating. If a 15 year old kisses another guy at a party cheating on there bf of like a few months, that not as a big of a deal as a boyfriend or husband of years cheating on there significant other. There is a stronger and deeper bond that forms over years you are with a person. The best relationships are between two friends. You know the saying best thing you can do is marry your best friend? Well when your in relationships for years that's what your significant other becomes only even more then that. So when that person cheats on you... there is nothing to compare it to other then soul crushing unbearable pain.
3) Also I LOVE writing horror, and murder and unspeakable acts of torture. I cant write a single romantic thing without EXTREME difficulty, and i hate romantic scenes in books and movies, most of the time it all just pisses me off. But being in love in IRL, there is no feeling to compare to that. Real love, not lust.
Just curious how long were you dating when he said he loved you?
Will let it slip 4 months into the relationship, i was freaking out and didn't know what to say, so i didn't say anything. Everyone had told me that wasn't suppose to come for like half a year. It wasn't until a few weeks afterwards that i realized i actually did love him when something happened that really opened my eyes. I was only 17 at the time.
OH and Twilight love isnt real love. I've never read the books but from everything I've learned about those books i would call that lustlove. Those books just piss me off, probably as much as Romeo and Juliet did. Again lustlove there.
As I was writing RBSL I strongly formulated my real feelings towards love.
1) Yes murder is drastically different from cheating but it can hurt a person just as much. Being cheated on makes you want to die yourself at times. It can destroy a person mentally. Now i'm not saying cheaters should go to jail or something I'm just saying in my opinion the act of cheating is just as bad, for the amount of damage it can cause a person, or families.
2) Cheating and Adultery are the same thing. If you are in a serious relationship, no matter the age, and you love someone with everything you have and then they go and cheat on you, it doesn't matter if your 15 or 93, its going to hurt the same. It also depends on the level of cheating. If a 15 year old kisses another guy at a party cheating on there bf of like a few months, that not as a big of a deal as a boyfriend or husband of years cheating on there significant other. There is a stronger and deeper bond that forms over years you are with a person. The best relationships are between two friends. You know the saying best thing you can do is marry your best friend? Well when your in relationships for years that's what your significant other becomes only even more then that. So when that person cheats on you... there is nothing to compare it to other then soul crushing unbearable pain.
3) Also I LOVE writing horror, and murder and unspeakable acts of torture. I cant write a single romantic thing without EXTREME difficulty, and i hate romantic scenes in books and movies, most of the time it all just pisses me off. But being in love in IRL, there is no feeling to compare to that. Real love, not lust.
Just curious how long were you dating when he said he loved you?
Will let it slip 4 months into the relationship, i was freaking out and didn't know what to say, so i didn't say anything. Everyone had told me that wasn't suppose to come for like half a year. It wasn't until a few weeks afterwards that i realized i actually did love him when something happened that really opened my eyes. I was only 17 at the time.
OH and Twilight love isnt real love. I've never read the books but from everything I've learned about those books i would call that lustlove. Those books just piss me off, probably as much as Romeo and Juliet did. Again lustlove there.
As I was writing RBSL I strongly formulated my real feelings towards love.
I don't know even know WHY I love Romeo and Juliet so much and why it stuck with me so much for me to keep referencing it in my novels. I've already referenced it in...at least 4 of my novels and I'm thinking of doing it in all as a sort of theme across all my romance stuff. Either in small ways or big ways, but it'll be something new with each book.
In LS it's a meaningful quote in regards to Kyle calling Rose "Lily" all the time (What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet).
In Tattoo Love it's also a quote (Did my heart love 'til now?Forswear its sight. For I never saw true beauty 'til this night) in reference to when Kieran started falling for Maira when he's never fallen in love or wanted to fall in love before. And that night was when he did her chivalrous tattoo, so he draws that tattoo next to the underlined quote in her Romeo and Juliet book.
In The Way to the Heart, it's my MC's name and how Romeo and Juliet is meaningful to his parents falling in love (which makes it meaningful to him) and the LI loves that play because Juliet was her first leading role and was highly successful, which was what got her wanting to do theater as a career.
In Always With Me, it's my FMC's name, the suicide, and the starcrossed lovers theme.
Yeah. I'm just SO in love with this play, even though I hardly remember the specifics. Just that they meet, they fall in love, they get married, they die. That's it, but it still has an influence over me lol
In LS it's a meaningful quote in regards to Kyle calling Rose "Lily" all the time (What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet).
In Tattoo Love it's also a quote (Did my heart love 'til now?Forswear its sight. For I never saw true beauty 'til this night) in reference to when Kieran started falling for Maira when he's never fallen in love or wanted to fall in love before. And that night was when he did her chivalrous tattoo, so he draws that tattoo next to the underlined quote in her Romeo and Juliet book.
In The Way to the Heart, it's my MC's name and how Romeo and Juliet is meaningful to his parents falling in love (which makes it meaningful to him) and the LI loves that play because Juliet was her first leading role and was highly successful, which was what got her wanting to do theater as a career.
In Always With Me, it's my FMC's name, the suicide, and the starcrossed lovers theme.
Yeah. I'm just SO in love with this play, even though I hardly remember the specifics. Just that they meet, they fall in love, they get married, they die. That's it, but it still has an influence over me lol
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I hated the book. I'm a realist and a pessimist. The book takes place across like 3-4 days. SERIOUSLY! You loved him sooooo much after JUST meeting him that you ran off got married then killed yourself? No, it just kills me simply for the timeline. It it happened over 3-4 years, or even 3-4 months I'd love it a whole lot more. But it was days. And that just drives me INSANE. I could never see myself at 14 or now, running off with my crush suddenly then getting married and killing myself because he was dead
Just defines all logical reasoning. And I know love isnt suppose to be logical, but that's how I operate.
Just defines all logical reasoning. And I know love isnt suppose to be logical, but that's how I operate.