Asexual Main Character

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The problem that I see is that most of your target audience for YA is dealing with the reality that their hearts are often set a-fluttering, and the cute guy/girl in their English class is more interesting to them than the Shakespeare they're supposed to be reading. They expect the books they read to reflect that.


Well, damn... What were my friends and I doing with our lives when we were teenagers? 'Cause, you know... we were in English class for the reasons you'd think someone was in English, and not because "damn, that boy in third period is HOT"...
 

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As the author of Quicksilver, I'm happy to report that so far I've had very little objection to my MC's asexuality and quite a number of readers who seemed to think it was a point in the book's favour.

I think it helps that my heroine is not the stereotypical emotion-shy, hyper-intellectual, touch-averse type that a lot of people associate with asexuality -- she's good at reading and relating to people generally, puts a high value on the relationships in her life, and is physically warm and demonstrative with people she cares about. Before writing her, I spent quite a bit of time watching the Asexuality tag on Tumblr and the AVEN (Asexuality Visibility and Education Network) forums to inform myself about the stereotypes and misconceptions that frustrate asexual people, and to make an effort to counter or address those in the course of the book.

I suppose it helps that this book was contracted by both my US and UK publishers long before they knew (or even I knew) that the heroine was asexual, so I had no pushback on that score. I didn't even mention it to either of my editors until I delivered the full first draft of the novel, and at that point they actually asked me to clarify my MC's asexuality a bit more and show more fully how it affects her day to day life and relationships, rather than asking me to take that aspect of the story out.

So I'd say there's definitely room for asexual characters in YA fiction. It's all a matter of how you approach writing them, and how likeable and identifiable the reader finds the character in other ways. And I should also mention that writing an asexual character doesn't preclude romance -- there are romantic asexuals who are quite happy with the idea of holding hands, hugging, kissing and may even be willing to engage in sex for the sake of pleasing a partner so long as they aren't actually repulsed by the act. They're just never going to get swept away on a wave of passion, that's all.
 

CharacterInWhite

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As a staunch LGBTQ supporter (which includes asexuals, despite not having an "A"), I think you should write your asexual character regardless of what people will think.

Social justice movements take a lot of heavy lifting to make progress. Whether you're the spark that sets the fire (think Martin Luther King Jr.) or just a cog in the machine, every bit helps. In other words, I think your cause is worth taking up merely for its own sake.

That said, if you're writing YA, you have a huge advantage--even the heterosexual characters are often uncertain of their own sexuality. You could write an asexual character that is entirely unaware asexuality even exists, and you probably wouldn't even have to raise the topic unless the plot demanded it (i.e. an arranged marriage or something).
 

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If I remember correctly the autistic protagonist of "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime" and that book was hugely successful, although it might not fall under YA. I do suspect that it was read and appreciated by many readers in that age-group though.
 

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As the author of Quicksilver, I'm happy to report that so far I've had very little objection to my MC's asexuality and quite a number of readers who seemed to think it was a point in the book's favour.

I think it helps that my heroine is not the stereotypical emotion-shy, hyper-intellectual, touch-averse type that a lot of people associate with asexuality -- she's good at reading and relating to people generally, puts a high value on the relationships in her life, and is physically warm and demonstrative with people she cares about. Before writing her, I spent quite a bit of time watching the Asexuality tag on Tumblr and the AVEN (Asexuality Visibility and Education Network) forums to inform myself about the stereotypes and misconceptions that frustrate asexual people, and to make an effort to counter or address those in the course of the book.

I suppose it helps that this book was contracted by both my US and UK publishers long before they knew (or even I knew) that the heroine was asexual, so I had no pushback on that score. I didn't even mention it to either of my editors until I delivered the full first draft of the novel, and at that point they actually asked me to clarify my MC's asexuality a bit more and show more fully how it affects her day to day life and relationships, rather than asking me to take that aspect of the story out.

So I'd say there's definitely room for asexual characters in YA fiction. It's all a matter of how you approach writing them, and how likeable and identifiable the reader finds the character in other ways. And I should also mention that writing an asexual character doesn't preclude romance -- there are romantic asexuals who are quite happy with the idea of holding hands, hugging, kissing and may even be willing to engage in sex for the sake of pleasing a partner so long as they aren't actually repulsed by the act. They're just never going to get swept away on a wave of passion, that's all.

Really nice to have some insight from someone on the other side of the publishing process. Thanks for sharing!
 
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As the author of Quicksilver, I'm happy to report that so far I've had very little objection to my MC's asexuality and quite a number of readers who seemed to think it was a point in the book's favour.

I think it helps that my heroine is not the stereotypical emotion-shy, hyper-intellectual, touch-averse type that a lot of people associate with asexuality -- she's good at reading and relating to people generally, puts a high value on the relationships in her life, and is physically warm and demonstrative with people she cares about. Before writing her, I spent quite a bit of time watching the Asexuality tag on Tumblr and the AVEN (Asexuality Visibility and Education Network) forums to inform myself about the stereotypes and misconceptions that frustrate asexual people, and to make an effort to counter or address those in the course of the book.

I suppose it helps that this book was contracted by both my US and UK publishers long before they knew (or even I knew) that the heroine was asexual, so I had no pushback on that score. I didn't even mention it to either of my editors until I delivered the full first draft of the novel, and at that point they actually asked me to clarify my MC's asexuality a bit more and show more fully how it affects her day to day life and relationships, rather than asking me to take that aspect of the story out.

So I'd say there's definitely room for asexual characters in YA fiction. It's all a matter of how you approach writing them, and how likeable and identifiable the reader finds the character in other ways. And I should also mention that writing an asexual character doesn't preclude romance -- there are romantic asexuals who are quite happy with the idea of holding hands, hugging, kissing and may even be willing to engage in sex for the sake of pleasing a partner so long as they aren't actually repulsed by the act. They're just never going to get swept away on a wave of passion, that's all.

AVEN is a fantastic resource for learning about asexuality. I used to have an account there, and I learned so much.
 

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Plenty of people are not crushing or dating in high school. And even those who are might just be able to squeeze their minds open enough to read about people with different experiences.
 

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Another thing to remember is that behavior does not equal orientation. Thus, your asexual character is welcome to have sex all they like, and they are still going to be asexual. Maybe your ace character is curious about sex, maybe they feel pressured to do it, maybe they're disgusted by the entire thing and can't even think about it without wanting to vomit, maybe they enjoy sex, or anywhere in between.

An asexual person does not feel sexual attraction to anyone. That's it. Asexuality says nothing about a person's sex drive, a person's romantic orientation, a person's behaviors, or a person's background.

As for the behaviors of an asexual person, you should feel free to draw on the experiences of both yourself and fellow aces. And while there is definitely pressure for females in YA novels to fall in love, it's not a requirement! Furthermore, it's possible that your character doesn't even have the word asexual. I didn't until relatively recently, and until that point, I just said that I'd never felt sexual attraction. For all your character might know, she just hasn't found anyone she's interested in in that way yet, even though she would identify as ace if she knew the word.

Focus more on your character's feelings, and you're probably fine.
 

Castaspella

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But how would that be any different from having a "sexual" character dealing with a person attracted to them in the case of unrequited love? There is zero sexual attraction either way.

It is different because it's an asexual character? I'm not sure what else to say ... the chance of reciprocation is probably low and people who like unrequited love stories live on the hope that something might eventually occur. If the asexual character were sympathic to the person attracted to them or if it was their friend ... it seems like it could be an interesting plot development because non-asexual people don't necessarily understand what asexuality means.
 

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It is different because it's an asexual character? I'm not sure what else to say ... the chance of reciprocation is probably low and people who like unrequited love stories live on the hope that something might eventually occur. If the asexual character were sympathic to the person attracted to them or if it was their friend ... it seems like it could be an interesting plot development because non-asexual people don't necessarily understand what asexuality means.
But even if the character in question is not asexual, if they don't feel any attraction, there is no chance of them suddenly developing it. I'm probably not expressing it well... if someone is in love with me, but I'm not in love with that person, I could just as well be asexual--because my reaction to that person is the same, meaning it lacks any sexual connotation whatsoever. It's a zero-zero situation.

Now if an asexual person actually feels affection for the other one, there is our conflict. A sexual love and an asexual love, probably unable to meet in the middle.
 

missesdash

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But even if the character in question is not asexual, if they don't feel any attraction, there is no chance of them suddenly developing it. I'm probably not expressing it well... if someone is in love with me, but I'm not in love with that person, I could just as well be asexual--because my reaction to that person is the same, meaning it lacks any sexual connotation whatsoever. It's a zero-zero situation.

Now if an asexual person actually feels affection for the other one, there is our conflict. A sexual love and an asexual love, probably unable to meet in the middle.

Nah, it happens all the time. You aren't initially attracted to someone, but maybe you get to know them and because of their personality, the sexual attraction results.

I mean it doesn't happen to me. But for a lot of people, sexual attraction is based at least partly on characteristics that you can't judge after a couple meetings.

So I think that's the other poster's point. There is hope and possibility of reciprocation in one scenario, not so with the other.
 

missesdash

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Another thing to remember is that behavior does not equal orientation. Thus, your asexual character is welcome to have sex all they like, and they are still going to be asexual. Maybe your ace character is curious about sex, maybe they feel pressured to do it, maybe they're disgusted by the entire thing and can't even think about it without wanting to vomit, maybe they enjoy sex, or anywhere in between.

An asexual person does not feel sexual attraction to anyone. That's it. Asexuality says nothing about a person's sex drive, a person's romantic orientation, a person's behaviors, or a person's background.

This is probably slightly pedantic, but asexuality generally speaks about a person's sex drive as far as partnered sex is concerned because sex drive is the physical desire to have partnered sex. If you physically desire to have sex with someone, you are sexually attracted to them.

That's why most standard definitions of 'asexual' refer to not feeling sexually attracted but also a disinterest in partnered sexual activities. They go hand in hand.
 

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I disagree. You can have all kinds of sexual desires other than desire for partnered sex. Asexuals are not necessarily non-sexual to the extent of not having orgasm etc. They may, for example, masturbate. It is a very queer (diverse) category.
 

missesdash

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I disagree. You can have all kinds of sexual desires other than desire for partnered sex. Asexuals are not necessarily non-sexual to the extent of not having orgasm etc. They may, for example, masturbate. It is a very queer (diverse) category.

Well that's why I said "as far as partnered sex is concerned."
 

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Well that's why I said "as far as partnered sex is concerned."

You don't have to be sexually attracted to someone to have sex. You may love them and see it as a way of spending time together. You may be a sex worker and you're being paid. Which is why asexuals may have sex with a partner.

However, in fiction, I've seen too many stories by sexual authors where the asexual is forced into situations where they must have sex. I'd be happy never to read one of those again. I'm sure an ace author would handle it with more sensitivity, but in general, it's not a theme I look for with asexual characters.
 

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You don't have to be sexually attracted to someone to have sex. You may love them and see it as a way of spending time together. You may be a sex worker and you're being paid. Which is why asexuals may have sex with a partner.

I'm aware. My post was specifically about sex drive which is a physical desire. I never said asexual people didn't have sex.
 
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Nah, it happens all the time. You aren't initially attracted to someone, but maybe you get to know them and because of their personality, the sexual attraction results.

I mean it doesn't happen to me. But for a lot of people, sexual attraction is based at least partly on characteristics that you can't judge after a couple meetings.

So I think that's the other poster's point. There is hope and possibility of reciprocation in one scenario, not so with the other.

This has definitely happened to me before, just in case someone wants to argue it can't.


You can be acquaintances/know someone casually, but if you don't really hang out, then they're not on your radar. And then for whatever reason you end up spending more time with them, and you realize: "Hey, this person is kinda sexy/awesome/pretty/whatever. I wonder why I never noticed before?"

It's not just an issue of reasons for attraction. It's psychological. Like, if you have a best friend of the opposite sex who you've known forever. They might be totally hot by your usual standards, but you've categorized them as a non-romantic relationship, because that's how you got to know each other. In the same way, you might have a person you don't know well in the non-romance category, because they don't have a strong affect on your life at the current time.
 

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Nah, it happens all the time. You aren't initially attracted to someone, but maybe you get to know them and because of their personality, the sexual attraction results.
I hate how that happens. And if you say anything, you feel all weird.

And then you have the reverse. Someone seems quite sexy until they open their mouth and you realize they're an asshole, and no, hate fucking will, never ensue because they're such a douchebag you could never live with yourself afterwards.

ETA: Now to actually be helpful. There is a lot of pressure to put romance in YA novels because romance sells to teens. But I think it could work if done well. If it was the centerpoint of the novel, I'd probably get bored and simply not care. Watching someone evade a romance for an entire novel because they feel no sexual attraction does not interest me. The Life And Times of An Asexual does not elicit the same excitement as Secret Diary of A Call Girl from me. That is the truth.

If it's simply a small subplot to a bigger story, well sure, why not?
 
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Nah, it happens all the time. You aren't initially attracted to someone, but maybe you get to know them and because of their personality, the sexual attraction results.

I mean it doesn't happen to me. But for a lot of people, sexual attraction is based at least partly on characteristics that you can't judge after a couple meetings.

So I think that's the other poster's point. There is hope and possibility of reciprocation in one scenario, not so with the other.

Ohhhhhh yeah. This happens to me all the time. Pretty much every "crush" I get is one of these :p usually it's me getting to know someone I don't find physically attractive at all, and then I discover their amazing sense of humour or we bond through shared experiences and develop all these inside jokes and then I'm totally into them in a pants kind of way.

Anyway. I wrote an asexual MC in my 2011 NaNo novel. It was a mystery, but a strong subplot was the MC falling in platonic love with a boy. She loved everything about him, personality-wise. She even thought his eyelashes were adorable and just being near him felt kind of magical. But kissing him? The one time they attempted sex? She did it because she wanted to feel closer to him (and because she knew he wanted it), but it felt empty and fake to her, and nowhere near as intimate as sitting on the hood of her car under the stars with him, talking about whatever. It was interesting to write.
 

Robert L.B.

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Whoa, lot of interesting discussion in this thread.

So far I'm of two minds. One to make the asexuality a minor sub-plot through the story, though the character doesn't know what it is only that she doesn't feel attraction when it's "normal" to do so. The other is to not bring attention to it at all and focus entirely on the adventure, with maybe a small drop that she doesn't respond the same way as other people to handwave away any suspicions while at the same time confirming nothing overt.
 

Castaspella

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But even if the character in question is not asexual, if they don't feel any attraction, there is no chance of them suddenly developing it. I'm probably not expressing it well... if someone is in love with me, but I'm not in love with that person, I could just as well be asexual--because my reaction to that person is the same, meaning it lacks any sexual connotation whatsoever. It's a zero-zero situation.

Now if an asexual person actually feels affection for the other one, there is our conflict. A sexual love and an asexual love, probably unable to meet in the middle.

Except it doesn't matter if they develop or not for it to be an interesting plot direction? People frequently hope for things in stories that don't actually occur in the end - they won't even know nothing is going to happen unless they read the book or have an understanding of asexuality to begin with (even then, who knows what the end will bring?).

Maybe I should have qualified the whole thing as saying "I personally think it would be interesting if a character had a crush on an asexual character who is their friend and part of the story follows how they deal with it - sexual attraction and romantic attraction being related in this case and not one or the other"?
 

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I would LOOOOVE to read a book with an asexual mc. Or even an MC that DOES happen to not be asexual, however absolutely no sexual-tension/romance/whatever is mentioned in the story at all, like how it is in Alice in Wonderland or Winnie the Pooh. If kids books can get away with it, why can't YA books??? I hate that YA romance has become so formulaic. It's at the point now where I literally expect the love interest to how up within the first two or three chapters and then I do a countdown to see when the 'Jacob' will show up so that there can be a love-triangle. It's so boring and predictable.

Not a YA novel, but the comic/graphic novel Fray (set in the far future in Joss Whedon's buffyverse) is completely free of any romance or sex. I don't think Fray's asexual. She's just busy doing other stuff, like staying alive. It's a great read!
 

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Except it doesn't matter if they develop or not for it to be an interesting plot direction? People frequently hope for things in stories that don't actually occur in the end - they won't even know nothing is going to happen unless they read the book or have an understanding of asexuality to begin with (even then, who knows what the end will bring?).
Ah, I got it.
And then when people finish the book(s) and still don't get what they hoped for, they start writing fanfiction. :)
 

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I just read a post in another thread where someone wrote that anything can be done -- it's just harder to do some things well. And it's so true.

Unfortunately, the YA market is demanding when it comes to creating some kind of romance and/or sexual tension. That's the reality. But if you can write an awesome book without it, I say go for it -- just go forth with the knowledge that publishers expect romance or romantic elements.

In my current WIP, I wanted my main girl character to have little interest in boys. She's got bigger fish to fry, so to speak. But I know that YA readers (and publishers) want and enjoy an element of romantic tension; plus, it can actually be fun to write. (Like you, I don't care about reading or writing romance, but if you look at it as a plot vehicle or additional conflict, it can change your approach). So I created the sexual tension by having her best guy-friend have a "thing" for her, and I made it part of the additional conflict that she faces -- she isn't interested in him or any other boys; she's too focused on her own path. Therefore, the boy-girl thing is in the story, but the girl is empowered and doesn't need the romance to get on with her life.

Granted, I haven't submitted this to my editor yet, but I'm optimistic that it's a good approach.

You can have romantic elements without having to write a romance. I really love the idea of having female characters that have the option to be a "girlfriend," but choose not to. And it can make for great conflict, while still satisfying the industry's expectation for romantic tension.

Good luck!
 

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That intense demand for sexual tension in the industry makes me worry for my own WIP. The most "romance" my MC experiences is briefly going through guys facebook profiles with her friends at a sleepover. Anything beyond that just didn't seem to work with the plot.

My fourteen year old MC has to deal with a PTSD relapse after one of her friends is murdered the first couple weeks of school and spends the rest of the time working with a thirty year old police officer to catch the killer. I can see writing a romance into a second or third book about her, but it just wouldn't make sense to have her dating right now.
 
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