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Old 05-28-2012, 04:50 PM   #3776
Robbert
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5. Could you spare a few dozen, or are they all counterfeit?


Your lovely four-year old son just informed your guests that he feels hungry. He further explains that Mummy has said to Papa, supper will only be served when everyone has left. What do you say to steer yourself out of this mess...?

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Old 05-29-2012, 06:05 AM   #3777
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1. Get out. I'm hungry too.
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Old 06-07-2012, 11:19 PM   #3778
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Lavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
2. You're welcome to join us. We're having liver and onions tonight.
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Old 06-08-2012, 01:14 PM   #3779
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Silent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
3. "Quit yo' crazy jibba-jabba, little jimmy!"
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Old 06-15-2012, 09:37 PM   #3780
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Snowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
4. "Don't practice your maitre d' voice with guests, honey."
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Old 06-18-2012, 05:35 PM   #3781
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5. Fire up the wood chipper!


Classic films that would have been enriched by the presence of Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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Old 06-18-2012, 05:38 PM   #3782
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Snowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
1. Mamma Mia!
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Old 06-18-2012, 06:12 PM   #3783
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Williebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
2. The Red Shoes
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Old 06-18-2012, 06:26 PM   #3784
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Kaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsKaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsKaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsKaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsKaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsKaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsKaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsKaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsKaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsKaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsKaiser-Kun is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
3. Citizen Kane
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Old 06-18-2012, 08:51 PM   #3785
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4. One flew over the cuckoo's nest.
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Old 06-18-2012, 09:30 PM   #3786
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Williebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
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3. Citizen Kane
"I'll be back... for my sled."

As opposed to the Sly Stallone ending:

"Yo' Rosebud."
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Old 06-18-2012, 09:38 PM   #3787
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iLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsiLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsiLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsiLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsiLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsiLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsiLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsiLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsiLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsiLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsiLion is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
5. Bambi

How to tell your neighbor that his wife is doing the entire neighborhood.
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Old 06-18-2012, 09:51 PM   #3788
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Williebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
(Works whether it is wife or husband.)


1. "Let's go to the videotape!"
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Old 06-19-2012, 01:26 PM   #3789
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2. If you could work from home, you'd get a better feel for what's going on around here.
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Old 06-19-2012, 03:35 PM   #3790
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Silent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
Better feel

3. Check out my team photo!
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Old 06-19-2012, 07:49 PM   #3791
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Lavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
4. Isn't it remarkable how much your sons look like the mailman and that UPS guy?
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Old 06-23-2012, 12:40 AM   #3792
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Snowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSnowstorm is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
5. Umm, I'm getting really tired of all the cars parked in your driveway. The line's so long, I can't get out!

A "friend" just handed you a puppy during your birthday party. Everyone's oohing and ahhing. You don't want a dog. What do you say?
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Old 06-23-2012, 01:01 AM   #3793
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Williebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
1. I shall name him... "YOURS!"
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Old 06-23-2012, 12:42 PM   #3794
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2. Oh, thank you. I've never had a puppy. Do they taste better baked or fried?
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Old 06-23-2012, 07:55 PM   #3795
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Williebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
3. "Wonder how fast he is? He looks really fast. Let's find out. Can we tie him to your car?"
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“You’re inventing your own misery. You’re defining yourself by pettiness. You get 70 years to live and you are enjoying being angry.” -- Russell Howard

"We're writers; we own our words. Please choose them to add light and not just heat."
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Old 06-25-2012, 03:23 AM   #3796
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Lavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
4. Oh great! I can use this little tyke for target practice.
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Old 06-25-2012, 10:44 PM   #3797
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5. Isn't your cousin in charge of an animal shelter?

Things you don't want to tell your work colleague who has just been fired...
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Old 06-25-2012, 10:48 PM   #3798
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Williebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsWilliebee is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
1. Wow! Your old chair is the best!

So's your office... and your secretary... and...
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"There's a Voodoo Game on in the Crescent City. Pray for the Pawns."

Available now where all kinds of cool books are sold.
Kobo Kindle Nook iBook
More stories by Eldon Hughes -- "I Found A Knife"

Read the Newbie Guide.

“You’re inventing your own misery. You’re defining yourself by pettiness. You get 70 years to live and you are enjoying being angry.” -- Russell Howard

"We're writers; we own our words. Please choose them to add light and not just heat."
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Old 06-25-2012, 10:55 PM   #3799
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Lavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsLavern08 is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
2. I printed all of those emails you sent me complaining about what a jerk the boss is.
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You haven't lived 'til you've been Laverned!

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Old 06-25-2012, 11:05 PM   #3800
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Silent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate complimentsSilent Rob is so great that we've run out of appropriate compliments
3. I'm never paying you back for that latte you bought me that one time at the leadership conference!
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