Self Doubts...How do you handle them?

We all doubt. It's human nature. You know in your heart if your story is good.

Feel the fear and do it anyway.

Writing is an odd industry in that so many participants (myself included at one time) feel they must immediately be experts or else they are failures. Could your story be written better? Maybe, maybe not. What is important is that it is the best you can write right now and that you are striving to improve your craft. Sometimes you'll take a huge leap forward, sometimes you'll take a few steps backward, and you'll probably always have a lingering doubt as to whether you are any good or everything is a fluke (heck, I am still not convinced my sales mean anything half the time).

Just stick with it and keep learning.




-Michelle

self doubt?

never had it.

Just keep this in mind - most people will never buy your book. Of those who do, half probably won't finish reading it. Of those who do finish it, half probably won't be too impressed. Of those who are impressed a few may absolutely love it and become true fans. That's just life. Write for those fans and for yourself and don't worry about the unavoidable.

I still get them. Fortunately, I've sold enough books and stories to recognize them as a part of my process. I know there's going to be a point on every book where I think it sucks, and I suck, and my editor's a fool for actually buying my work, and my readers are all going to lynch me when they see this piece of drek. (Usually, this happens more than once.)

It happens, and it's easy to get discouraged. But I've learned that if I just keep writing, sooner or later I'll write something I love and decide I'm brilliant again

III said:

Just keep this in mind - most people will never buy your book. Of those who do, half probably won't finish reading it. Of those who do finish it, half probably won't be too impressed. Of those who are impressed a few may absolutely love it and become true fans. That's just life. Write for those fans and for yourself and don't worry about the unavoidable.

Click to expand...

goodbye cruel world...

All of us, except DWSTXS, who I suspect is lying, have self-doubts. It's part and parcel with being a writer. We're a strange breed, we want people to read our stories, but then at the same time we're filled with insecurities about what they'll think of it.

III said:

Just keep this in mind - most people will never buy your book. Of those who do, half probably won't finish reading it. Of those who do finish it, half probably won't be too impressed. Of those who are impressed a few may absolutely love it and become true fans. That's just life. Write for those fans and for yourself and don't worry about the unavoidable.

Click to expand...

Well that was depressing.

Rejections after a partial bring up BIG doubt and discouragement. I think 'I'll never write again.'
But then it goes away after a few days and I'm back.
Insecurity is fuel if you have the insight to see it that way. It connects you to others and helps you understand them, which is critical for a fiction writer.

I'm pretty good at rationalizing.

TinaCherilee said:

Self Doubts...How do you handle them?

Click to expand...

Liquor.

Shadow_Ferret said:

Well that was depressing.

Click to expand...

Why? Because it's not realistic to expect to have legions of fans or universal acclaim? Even the most successful authors have plenty of haters and millions of sold books that remain only half-read by the masses. People have different tastes, but that doesn't mean your writing sucks. People buy a book because they like the cover or the concept, but for any number of reasons they don't finish it. Maybe they're busy. Maybe they were distracted. Maybe the style wasn't their cup of tea.

I'm fortunate enough to have a handful of self-proclaimed "fans" of my books. As I work on my WIP, I'm not focusing on those who didn't like the first books or the shortcomings I know I had; I'm focusing on telling a story to those "fans" and improving as a storyteller, otherwise I'd give up writing entirely and spend time learning plumbing or something that's actually useful.

Hell, one fan makes it all worth it for me.

You find trusted cohorts who will talk you off the ledge whenever you feel the need to climb up on it.

I thought I was just a mental basket case until I arrived here and realized I had partners in the same mental group of self doubt. On Monday I might think what I wrote is great and then by Wed. I think it sucks, then by Friday and a couple of beers later I'm back to thinking I'm ok. I've got a great group of friends/betas who keep my spirits going. I'm a writer and always have been. The times I want to quit because I think I suck, I just can't. I figure even if I never realize the dream of being published, I'll still be writing. It's something I just feel a need to do. I figure when I die the kid will find drawers of manuscripts and have to deal with them, by then I will no longer care. Don't give up because what you are feeling is only natural.

All humans have moments of self-doubt. Some have minutes of self-doubt. A few have hours of self-doubt. An unfortunate handful, days of self-doubt.

But writers are lucky. They get to have whole WEEKS of self-doubt! Like between mailing the MS and hearing back about it.

Seriously, though. You just have to keep writing and rewriting and seeking compatible beta readers who'll keep you on track. Then you have to suck it up and start submitting. Remember, for every crit and rejection you get, the big Reputation Counter in the sky gives you a plus point! Why? Because you had the guts to put your work out there.

You'll only start racking up negative points if you quit. Really. S'true. I saw it in a dream, all immense and shiny, with a counter dial for everyone in the universe. It was cool.

I have bursts of self-confidence punctuating nearly constant self-doubt.

Without self-doubt you would just be a bad writer. Just consider your family and friends to be a bunch of liars. The ones who lift you up are just being nice and the ones who tear you down are just being jealous. Find someone who doesn't owe you anything... someone who knows writing. Someone whose opinion you can trust. If you can't find that person, then just assume you are bad and work your ass off to prove yourself wrong. You are all you have.

III said:

Just keep this in mind - most people will never buy your book. Of those who do, half probably won't finish reading it. Of those who do finish it, half probably won't be too impressed. Of those who are impressed a few may absolutely love it and become true fans. That's just life. Write for those fans and for yourself and don't worry about the unavoidable.

Click to expand...

Was that supposed to help? You could've said it nicer....

Self-doubts crush and paralyze me. People get fed up with me and yell at me because of my excessive self-doubting. I still think they're wrong. I suck. And now I'm stuck trying to write a paper to give a freaking conference and OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING WHEN I SIGNED UP FOR THIS? I'M NOT CAPABLE!

Dammit!

Take your fear and pretend you're putting it in a big box. Then blow the box up.

Having fun with fear is one way to squash it

I remind myself that the last time I allowed myself to doubt myself as a writer, I stopped writing, and didn't write a single bloody word for thirty years. Not this time, baby. Not this time.

KTC is right. Self-doubt is an asset. Without it, no one would strive to be better at his/her craft. The need for approval is one thing, and God knows we all suffer from that desire. If that's all we're seeking, a constant stream of nodding heads who agree that we are what we think we are (wonderful) never really helps. I'm all for affirming beautiful writing, but without that head who shakes from side to side, who says "I think you could do better," would you work harder? Would you study and research and do all the things that might lift you to another level? Maybe, but most likely, upon hearing those wonderful things, most of us would just sit back in the lazy-boy, a smug smile on our faces, and wait for the accolades. Not much promise in that.

My self-doubt is just part of me. I have it in everything I do, from parenting to novel writing to my career. The novel-writing self doubt, however, is special because there’s precious little way for me to get affirmation that I can do it at all. In parenting, I have those wonderful beings that are my kids that I think I must have had something to with. In my career, I have my supervisor who gives me feedback and performance reviews. But in novel-writing I’m isolated. Just me and my brain. And no one is there to pat me on the back and say, “Good job,” or “You’re on the right track.” I don’t know how to get over the doubt, beyond simply enjoying the process of writing and creating.

DamaNegra said:

Was that supposed to help? You could've said it nicer....

Click to expand...

Everyone will buy everything you write, regardless of the genre. They will all read it in one sitting and be so overcome with rapture they will blow their brains out because life will never be as good as it was while they were reading your novel.

Happy now? Murderer.

Everybody is scared one way or another. Writing to me is a haven wherein I can be myself and create a perfect world. The idea of showing your work to others makes you vulnerable and open to critism. All I am saying is that your not perfect but so am I. Self doubt is a biological means for preservation. What do you have to lose after a harsh critism? Nothing but you can learn from that to make yourself from a mediocre writer to an incredible writer. I am not saying you are but there are times we tend to feel that. Dont let fear take control of your talent and ideas.