The Old Farts Bar, Grill and Infirmary

Reportedly, Ernest Hemingway considered his best work his short story that consisted of only six words, titled "Baby Shoes." The story: "For sale: baby shoes, never worn."

There's something enticing about minimalism, given life in today's world, with our senses and minds bombarded with so many distractions, natural and contrived, that serve only to muddy our minds and obscure the path in front of us. Minimalism, in the form of philosophical aphorisms, impressionistic art, ancient cultures, e.g., traditional Japanese lifestyle and customs, can sometimes clear the mind and shed light on the significant elements of the human experience.

In the spirit of Hemingway's words, here's a view, featuring Sami's shoes, of what is really important. It's also titled, "Baby Shoes."

Ok, Joe,

That was so beautiful, it almost made me weep.

Lavern08 said:

Ok, Joe,

That was so beautiful, it almost made me weep.

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Oops! Didn't mean to do that, Auntie Vernie. At one time, a minimum of two Jack Daniels on the rocks was required for me to wax philosophical - as I get older, it happens even after a glass of warm milk.

As with everything in my life, I'm several days years late and many dollars short.

I'm 71 years, four months, and ten days old. Does it get me in in as a probie to the old fart's club?

I clicked on JoeBear's URL, but it was audio, so I'll have to wait for the closed captions version.

Meanwhile, I'll begin with Haggis's first post and read forward.

Chase

Chase said:

As with everything in my life, I'm several days years late and many dollars short.

I'm 71 years, four months, and ten days old. Does it get me in in as a probie to the old fart's club?

I clicked on JoeBear's URL, but it was audio, so I'll have to wait for the closed captions version.

Meanwhile, I'll begin with Haggis's first post and read forward.

Chase

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Welcome, Chase. You're a little on the young side, but there are younger among us...right, Andreea? If you start with Haggis' first post and read forward, you can save a lot of time by just skipping his and Porter's posts. We all do.

I'll see about getting the closed captions version to you.

Chase said:

As with everything in my life, I'm several days years late and many dollars short.

I'm 71 years, four months, and ten days old. Does it get me in in as a probie to the old fart's club?

I clicked on JoeBear's URL, but it was audio, so I'll have to wait for the closed captions version.

Meanwhile, I'll begin with Haggis's first post and read forward.

Chase

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Been wondering when you'd find your way over here, Chase.

You know you can save time by avoiding JoeBear's posts. All he talks about is diapers anyhow. You'd think he'd be out of them by now.

Haggis said:

Been wondering when you'd find your way over here, Chase.

You know you can save time by avoiding JoeBear's posts. All he talks about is diapers anyhow. You'd think he'd be out of them by now.

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Hey, at our ages, it's not easy changing your own diapers.

JoeBear said:

Hey, at our ages, it's not easy changing your own diapers.

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Loved the essay JB. You really ought to write more of them. You're very good.

BTW, do you ever play Buzztime Trivia (the kind they play in bars and restaurants)? I saw a JBear on the national game winner's list the other day. He was just a couple places behind some fellow named "Haggis."

JB love that picture of the shoes.

Haggis, please keep that glitter fairy to yourself.

Chase welcome. See now I was glad for the audio as I can't see the close captions!

JoeBear said:

I'll see about getting the closed captions version to you.

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Thanks for the kind welcome. I meant I would check your site for a print version, but I do appreciate you taking the time to print your essay in a personal message.

What a champion you are for thinking and acting your age. My girlfriend thinks so, too.

Haggis said:

Been wondering when you'd find your way over here, Chase.

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What part of SLOW in my avatar don't you understand? (Thanks for your welcome and advice, too.)

JoeBear said:

Hey, at our ages, it's not easy changing your own diapers.

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It Depends.

Chase said:

It Depends.

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*rim shot*

Haggis said:

Loved the essay JB. You really ought to write more of them. You're very good.

BTW, do you ever play Buzztime Trivia (the kind they play in bars and restaurants)? I saw a JBear on the national game winner's list the other day. He was just a couple places behind some fellow named "Haggis."

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Thanks, Haggis.

I haven't seen the trivia game in bars around here for quite a while. The last time I remember playing one, years ago, I got upset with it anyway. The area was M*A*S*H trivia, which I don't miss. The question was, "Which character on the show was part Indian?" The correct answer was Colonel Potter who pointed out his heritage to Major Charles Emerson Winchester, III, who was on a humorous tirade regarding minorities and slighted Native Americans. The damned game showed the answer as Radar, probably only because he was from Ottumwa, IA. That turned me off the game if they couldn't even get that right. It may have been corrected in their software by now.

Chase said:

Thanks for the kind welcome. I meant I would check your site for a print version, but I do appreciate you taking the time to print your essay in a personal message.

What a champion you are for thinking and acting your age. My girlfriend thinks so, too.

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You're most certainly welcome, Chase. I don't often get accused of acting my age.

By the way, what do you Chase? Besides your girlfriend, I mean. I used to chase Gail, though many years ago.

Welcome chase which is a nice name even though it reminds me of a bank or something that I have to do but youll find that there are not very many really good people on the thread but there are some you should be afraid of like laverne and the things she keeps under her bed but if you king of skip over 97.3 of what JB says you can catch up pretty fast and watch out in case haggissss brought over some of the happy hour stuff mel finds on the road to put out for the comedy caberet crowd which is usually not as descerning concerning some of what they eat and drink but over here the thing to watch out for is the green jello that cray sometime brings a tray of because it quivers and most of what quivers is not good to eat especially if it is more than a few days old before mel finds it and some of the people here are really old that im afraid of since they have not been taking their meds because

PorterStarrByrd said:

Welcome chase which is a nice name even though it reminds me of a bank or something that I have to do but youll find that there are not very many really good people on the thread but there are some you should be afraid of like laverne and the things she keeps under her bed but if you king of skip over 97.3 of what JB says you can catch up pretty fast and watch out in case haggissss brought over some of the happy hour stuff mel finds on the road to put out for the comedy caberet crowd which is usually not as descerning concerning some of what they eat and drink but over here the thing to watch out for is the green jello that cray sometime brings a tray of because it quivers and most of what quivers is not good to eat especially if it is more than a few days old before mel finds it and some of the people here are really old that im afraid of since they have not been taking their meds because

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Exactly...sorta.

Hey, Port, 97.3 is the local classical music station. They play stuff like Bendover's Fifth Symphony, Rebel's Bolero, Levi Strauss's Blue Danube, Bachus's violin concertinas, and other high-brow, long-hair stuff.

My mom named me Charles in a family full of 'em. There were already Charleys and Chucks, even a Chick, Chas, and CL, so Chase fit a kid who lived to hunt.

This is Kay, the girlfriend I chase, and me.



No, wait. Those two are other American Gothics.

This is us. Between is Kay's great-granddaughter. You probably can't see her because she's wearing camo.

A GGD? Dang! I'm still trying to get my first GDs running on their own.

Congrats on that.

SR, Porter, and Michael: thanks for the warm welcomes and worthwhile warnings.

To fill in the white space à la Porter, I was raised on a farm along the Yellowstone River in Montana, was an army small arms instructor, taught high school and college English. After all hearing finally went, I discovered deafness is unique: I picked the only disability people get mad at you for having and the only one for which U.S. social security won't grant a disability. So I wrangled bees (which sting the deaf, elderly, and foolish indiscriminately) for an Oregon apiary until age 66 (and a few months) in order to maximize my retirement and write mystery novels, read, hunt, read, fish, read, compete at muzzle-loader rendezvous, read, and edit part time.

I lived in Great Falls for a few years. Nice area. Love the fishing.

No warnings, just glad no one warned you about me . . .

Chase said:

My mom named me Charles in a family full of 'em. There were already Charleys and Chucks, even a Chick, Chas, and CL, so Chase fit a kid who lived to hunt.

This is Kay, the girlfriend I chase, and me.

This is us. Between is Kay's great-granddaughter. You probably can't see her because she's wearing camo.

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Nope, can't see the GGD but the chasee is a very pretty young lady - in fact, looks too young to be a GGM. Ah, now I see the GGD. How old is she...15 months or so?

Michael Myers said:

A GGD? Dang! I'm still trying to get my first GDs running on their own.

Congrats on that.

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My D's just starting to walk and I'm not looking forward to her running. She wears me out just walking.

Let's face it JB .. at you age walking to the kitchen to get a sammich wears you out .. but I'm thinking the cub will get you in shape soon.

Chase.. What part of Ore-a- gone are you from? (Sandy and Eugene are my old stomping grounds)

I 'lowd as my Maine girlfriends sister had been to Wisconsin, her east coast pronunciation of our state's name was understandable since they have a town named Oregon there and pronounce it wrong, She corrected me and told me she learned how to pronounce it from her geography teacher and that was the correct pronunciation ...

Go ducks. (I'm in the sports hall of fame there)

PorterStarrByrd said:

Let's face it JB .. at you age walking to the kitchen to get a sammich wears you out .. but I'm thinking the cub will get you in shape soon.

Chase.. What part of Ore-a- gone are you from? (Sandy and Eugene are my old stomping grounds)

I 'lowd as my Maine girlfriends sister had been to Wisconsin, her east coast pronunciation of our state's name was understandable since they have a town named Oregon there and pronounce it wrong, She corrected me and told me she learned how to pronounce it from her geography teacher and that was the correct pronunciation ...

Go ducks. (I'm in the sports hall of fame My picture's on the wall of the post office there)

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FIFY.

It's great to be gathered into the fold; I'll try to pay this generosity forward.

Porter, I’m a relative newcomer to Oregon, but it’s clear why U of O is the Ducks and OSU is the Beavers--a whole bunch of rain and rivers.

I’m in Albany across the Willamette (rhymes with God-damn-it, I'm told) from Corvallis (Go, Beavs!), midway twixt Portland and Eugene (Go, Ducks!). I carefully do not take sides in this often un-civil war.

It’s the only state with an alternate side to its flag: the flip side shows a beaver. Also unique is an official pronunciation guide for dumbass out-of-staters. "Present day residents say ‘OR-uh-gun.’"

Porter, your fellow alumni Joey Harrington passed out pronunciation stickers when he played for Detroit: ORYGUN. In any war of words, I play the deaf card and get a sympathetic pass from most.

SR, "Great Falls has it alls." Besides the majestic string of waterfalls is the world’s shortest river from Giant Springs to the Missouri. I've lived all over Montana, and C.M. Russell country is a favorite. My mysteries take place in the nearby Highwood Mountains.

JoeBear, yeah, Kay’s just a kid, barely old enough to retire this last May at 66. I know, I know . . . I should date someone my age, but I’ve always gone for the young, innocent chicks (who just happen to be fluent in ASL).

Chase said:

JoeBear, yeah, Kay’s just a kid, barely old enough to retire this last May at 66. I know, I know . . . I should date someone my age, but I’ve always gone for the young, innocent chicks (who just happen to be fluent in ASL).

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This could be trouble ..
My daughter is a senior at U of O and is taking ASL

JB .. Pass the shotgun over here please ...

PorterStarrByrd said:

This could be trouble ..
My daughter is a senior at U of O and is taking ASL

JB .. Pass the shotgun over here please ...

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Okay, Porter, here 'tis. Be careful, it has a Damascus barrel - none of them modern, high-falutin', smokeless shells.