Favorite lines you've written

Katharine Tree said:

Antsy antsy antsy. The Bear's Wife starts to publish tomorrow. White-knuckling it with crazy hopes of having a hit, while simultaneously reminding myself of how disappointing other book launches have been. Please please please let this at least generate gin money to fuel the next one.

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Nick squatted beside the house to feel beneath the bricks that formed its back stoop. There was practically no light; the houses were four stories tall, with lines of washing strung between, which almost entirely obscured the moon and starlight. Still, the windows across the way looked down on us. I watched them in mute resignation.

“Daagh!” Nick scattled away from the steps and hit his back on the yard’s wall. A tiny shadow squeaked and scampered away. “Vicious wee bastard bit me!”

“Cannot blame him,” Flint said. “Fingered his wee wifey, did you? Is she well-favored?”

“Aye, but too small to take me.” Nick thrust his hand under the steps again.

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BethS said:

A delight, as always. I'm wildly curious to know who, exactly, is under the steps.

And as I've noted before, your writing is plenty good enough to attract an agent and a publisher. Just sayin'.

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ASeiple said:

"MF. YES. SOME BACKGROUND MAY BE NECESSARY. AS OF FIVE MINUTES AGO THE SLAUGHTERHOUSE NINE ARE NOW THE BUTCHER SHOP TWO." The mask tilted as Dire considered. "PROBABLY GONNA GO DOWN TO THE HOT DOG STAND ONE BEFORE THE DAY'S OUT."

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Katharine Tree said:

A family of mice is under the steps. Nick is feeling for a key hidden there.

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Katharine Tree said:

A family of mice is under the steps. Nick is feeling for a key hidden there.

I queried several likely agents, well ahead of publishing, and none of them were interested. Guess the big bucks for this one are mine-all-mine.

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But your writing is good, Katharine.

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How would Wildsword have reported to my father that I’d been killed on the trip? I hope he would have given me the dignity of dying in battle. But it would probably have pleased him to claim that Kessie was startled by a rabbit, and I fell off and broke my neck.

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Reziac said:

Hee hee, a fine passel of lowlife we've assembled here today

I like the ambiguity of "Wildsword". It could be "wild sword" or "wilds word", both pleasing to my eye.

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Reziac said:

Jhavinn is a minor bad guy who took on a life of his own. Here he's trying to steal a starship.

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Reziac said:

Jhavinn is a minor bad guy who took on a life of his own. Here he's trying to steal a starship.

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Sunray Seeker, said the plate next the hatch. Fancy-ass name for a plain-looking ship. He'd have to change it.

He started toward Sunray, and two guards came out of the shack at a run. "Hold it!" one yelled, waving a blaster and meaning business.

So Jhavinn halted, all innocence. "Just come to pick up my ship."

"It's got impound fees," said the guard with the blaster. The other backed away toward the shack, talking into a comlink as he went.

"Fine," said Jhavinn, making like to dig credits from his pouch, "how much?"

"I dunno. You gotta go to town and get a release."

This one wasn't going to take a bribe, he could tell. And the other had already informed on him. So he said, "All right," all pleasant-like, and headed for the gate. The short walk to town would stretch his legs. He sneaked a look back as he turned onto the road. The guard was still standing there, blaster in hand, not trusting him at all. Some people had more duty crammed up their ass than was good for them.

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He was trying to figure out how to eat the good parts of the fish while avoiding its fins and scales, all without a knife, when he became aware of a growing silence and the crowd shifting out of the path of someone climbing the central aisle. He looked up expectantly, his movement mirrored by everyone on the dais.

Hopes were dashed. It was not Rodan, but a group of seven men. All wore long tunics of leather bleached pale as bone, trimmed in black fur and the white feathers of a winter owl, and their gray hair flowed loose over their shoulders. Most appeared elderly, but none were infirm; rather, there was an erect agelessness about them, like the strength and grandeur of old trees.

Ah. Darric straightened for a better look. Enter the Shirin.

They halted in a semi-circle a few paces away. Egon, expressionless, nodded with stiff courtesy. One of the Shirin interpreted this as an invitation and seated himself next to Moriana. The rest faded to the back of the dais.

The newly arrived man had iron-gray hair hanging in long wisps down to his waist, a rather aggressive nose, and restless dark eyes. They surveyed those sitting around him, skipping over Darric as if he were unpleasant to look at, and coming to rest on Moriana.

"Where is Rodan, child?" he asked gently. He had a diplomat's voice, tempered and polished, like exceptionally fine steel.

She shrugged, avoiding his gaze. Aland gave a short laugh. "No doubt he's preparing himself and his bed for the night ahead."

Laughter rippled among those near enough to hear him, though Egon did not join in. The Shirin's leader again eyed Moriana, with an expression Darric did not like—proprietary but not at all fatherly. After a moment, the man turned to Egon, a smile still lingering. "While we're waiting, tell me what this Keldian has said to you." He inclined his head toward Darric.

"He says he's an emissary, sent from the leader of the Keldians. Tomorrow I will send him back."

"I remind you that the Shirin are owed a price for him." The man looked directly at Darric for the first time. "I've been thinking about that price. According to our custom, in return for your healing you must give whatever I ask. Why should I not require the eyes to be gouged from your face, the guts reeled from your belly, and the skin peeled from your bones?"

Darric laid the fish he'd been attempting to flay back on his plate, his appetite now utterly vanquished.

"You may ask one boon," Egon said gruffly, "not three."

Scant cause for relief, in Darric's opinion. "Why heal the ankle if you only mean to kill the man?"

The Shirin's leader considered him, nostrils pinched as if he smelled something foul. "To give us the right to kill the man."

Darric opened his mouth to say something pointed, and likely useless, about the concept of diplomatic immunity, but Egon cut him off. "Aodh, I remind you that he is under my son's protection. You may have your boon, but not at the cost of his life or limbs. He will return to his people alive and unmarked."

Something vicious glittered in Aodh's eyes. "Send him to me in the morning, then, after the consummation feast. I will think of…something appropriate."

Darric had no intention of spending the next day playing frog to Aodh's schoolboy tortures. "No," he said. "Name the price and I will pay it now. If it is reasonable."

A faint flush mottled Aodh's neck. "Be silent, Keldian. You have no voice in this."

"He doesn't, but I do." Kain had risen, and everyone stared up at him in surprise. "I brought the healer, I claim the boon," he said calmly. "Let the Keldian tell us the truth about why he crossed the wall. Let him tell us here and now."

Darric closed his eyes briefly, both grateful and dismayed. Damn.

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Twick said:

Aelfinn manages to skip out on travelling with his enemies:

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BethS said:

So Darric is a lone emissary in enemy territory. The enemy, a more primitive people than Darric's own, doesn't quite know what to do with him.

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Reziac said:

Love all the little interactions, and perhaps more to the point, people avoiding interacting. Lots going on here.

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BethS said:

So Darric is a lone emissary in enemy territory. The enemy, a more primitive people than Darric's own, doesn't quite know what to do with him.

Egon is the enemy chieftain. The Shirin are seers and wield a great deal of power. Darric has heard of them but never met one until now.

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BethS said:

So Darric is a lone emissary in enemy territory. The enemy, a more primitive people than Darric's own, doesn't quite know what to do with him.

Egon is the enemy chieftain. The Shirin are seers and wield a great deal of power. Darric has heard of them but never met one until now.

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PandaMan said:

I like how there's tension, not only in the words spoken, but in every movement and gesture. Nice job!

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GregM said:

I like that each character had a voice of their own. The writing is good, and interesting! I wanted to keep reading but it ended.

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Reziac said:

Jhavinn is a minor bad guy who took on a life of his own. Here he's trying to steal a starship.

===============

Sunray Seeker, said the plate next the hatch. Fancy-ass name for a plain-looking ship. He'd have to change it.

He started toward Sunray, and two guards came out of the shack at a run. "Hold it!" one yelled, waving a blaster and meaning business.

So Jhavinn halted, all innocence. "Just come to pick up my ship."

"It's got impound fees," said the guard with the blaster. The other backed away toward the shack, talking into a comlink as he went.

"Fine," said Jhavinn, making like to dig credits from his pouch, "how much?"

"I dunno. You gotta go to town and get a release."

This one wasn't going to take a bribe, he could tell. And the other had already informed on him. So he said, "All right," all pleasant-like, and headed for the gate. The short walk to town would stretch his legs. He sneaked a look back as he turned onto the road. The guard was still standing there, blaster in hand, not trusting him at all. Some people had more duty crammed up their ass than was good for them.

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