Learn Writing with Uncle Jim, Volume 1

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gabbleandhiss

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1. Opening Image
The very first impression of what a movie is -- its tone, its mood, the type and scope of the film. It gives us the starting point of the hero. It gives us a moment to see a "before" snapshot of the guy or gal or goup of people we are about to follow on this adventure.

2. Theme Stated
Somewhere in the first five minutes of a well-structure screenplay, someone (usually not the main character) will pose a question or make a statement (usually to the main character) that is the theme of the movie. This statement is the movie's thematic premise.

In many ways a good screenplay is an argument posed by the screenwriter, the pros and cons of living a particular kind of life, or pursuing a particular goal. And the rest of the screenplay is the argument laid out, either proving or disproving this tatement, and looking at it, pro and con, from every angle.

3. Set-up
This is the make-or-break section where you have to grab the audience or risk losing them. The first ten minutes "sets up" the hero, the stakes, and goal of the story.

Make sure you've introduced or hinted at introducing every character in the A story.

Plant every character tic, exhibit every behavior that needs to be addressed later on, and show how and why the hero will need to change in order to win.

And when there's something that our hero wants or is lacking, this is the place to stick the Six Things That Need Fixing. Six is an arbitrary number, that stands for the laundry list you must show the audience of what is missing in the hero's life. These six character tics and flaws will be exploded later in the script, turned on their heads and cured.

The first 10 pages and the rest of Act One is the movie's thesis; it's where we see the world as it is before the adventure starts. There is a sense in the set-up that a storm's about to hit, because for things to stay as they are. . . is death. Things must change.

4. Catalyst
Call to adventure.

Catalyst moments: telegrams, getting fired, catching the wife in bed with another man, news that you have three days to live, etc.

Life-changing events often come disguised as bad news. The catalyst is not what it seems. It's the opposite of good news, and yet, by the time the adventure is over, it's what leads the hero to happiness.

5. Debate
This is the last chance for the hero to debate whether to stay or go.

The debate section must ask a question of some kind.

Once the debate question has been answered, the hero can proceed into Act Two.

6. Break into Two
The act break is the moment where we leave the old world, the thesis statement, behind and proceed into a world that is the upside down version of that, its antithesis. Because these two worlds are so distinct, the act of actually stepping into Act Two must be definite.

The hero cannot be lured, tricked, or drift into Act Two. The hero must make the decision himself -- he must be proactive.

7. B Story
the B story of most screenplays is "the love story." It is also the story that carries the theme of the movie.

The B story gives us a breather from the A story and the abrupt jump into Act Two and its whole new world.

This is where the hero will be nurtured. This is the place where the hero will confide what she is learning. This is the place from which the hero will draw the strength he needs for the final push into Act Three and ultimate victory.

The B story is also very often a brand new bunch of characters. These are the upside down versions of those characters who inhabit the world of Act One.

It provides not only the love story and a place to openly discuss the theme of your movie, but gives the writer the vital "cutaways" from the A story.

8. Fun and Games
This section provides the promise of the premise. It is the core and essence of the movie's poster. It is where most of the trailer moments of a movie are found. It's where we arent' as concerned with the forward progress of the story -- the stakes won't be raised until the midpoint -- as we are concerned with having "fun."

Why did I come to see this movie?

This section is lighter in tone than other sections.

9. Midpoint
There are two halves in a movie script and the midpoint on page 55 is the threshold between them.

A movie's midpoint is either an "up" where the hero seemingly peaks (though it is a false peak) or a "down" when the world collapses all around the hero (though it is a false collapse), and it can only get better from here on out.

The stakes are raised at the midpoint. It's the point where the fun and games are over. It's back to the story!

It's never as good as it seems to be at the midpoint and it's never as bad as it seems at the All Is Lost point. Or vice versa.

10. Bad Guys Close In
This is the point where the bad guys decide to regroup and send in the heavy artillery. It's the point where internal dissent, doubt, and jealousy begin to disintegrate the hero's team.

Evil is not giving up, and there is nowhere for the hero to go for help. He is on his own and must endure. He is headed for a huge fall.

11. All Is Lost
It is the opposite of a midpoint in terms of an "up" or a "down."

Even though all looks black, it's just temporary. But it seems like a total defeat. All aspects of the hero's life are in shambles.

This is the place where mentors go to die, presumably so their students can discover "they had it in them all along."

It's where the old world, the old character, the old way of thinking dies. It clears the way for the fusion of thesis -- what was -- and antithesis -- the upside down version of what was -- to become synthesis, that being a new world, a new life.

12. Dark Night of the Soul
It is the point just before the hero reaches way, deep down and pulls out that last, best idea that will save himself and everyone around him.

This is the point where the hero admits humility and humanity, and yeilds control of events over to Fate. He is beaten and knows it.

13. Break into Three
Both in the external story (the A story) and the internal story (the B story), which now meet and intertwine, the hero has prevailed, passed every test, and dug deep to find the solution. Now all he has to do is apply it.

The classic fusion of A and B is the hero getting the clue from "the girl" that makes him realize how to solve both -- beating the bad guys and winning the heart of his beloved.

14. Finale
It's where the lessons learned are applied. It's where the story tics are mastered. It's where the A story and B story end in triumph for our hero. It's the turning over of the old world and a creation of a new world order -- all thanks to the hero, who leads the way based on what he experienced in the upside-down, antithetical world of Act Two.

The finale entails the dispatching of all the bad guys, in ascending order. Lieutenants and henchman die first, then the boss. The chief source of "the problem" must be dispatched completely for the new world order to exist.

This is where a new society is born. It's not enough for the hero to triumph, he must change the world.

15. Final Image
This is the opposite of the opening image. It is proof that change has occurred and that it's real.


Beat Sheet for the Wedding Crashers courtesy of www.blakesnyder.com

http://www.blakesnyder.com/downloads/Wedding_Crashers_Beat_Sheet_FINAL.doc

He also provides a BS2 for Miss Congeniality in his book Save the Cat! And he's got another book consisting of 50 movies beat for beat. I think that's called Save the Cat Goes to the Movies.

At any rate, I think it's fairly similar to Joseph Campbell's monomyth structure. Nonetheless, it won't write your story for you. But if you're the kind of person who outlines, maybe it'll help. :)
 

Chris Grey

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Not even Plot Genie writes the story for you. To answer the question, though... what came first, the story or the plot analysis? Either every writer since the beginning of time knew what outline worked best and applied their story to it, or all the successful stories since the beginning of time had certain elements in common and this analysis picked some of them out.

The idea has been around at least since Poulti. Does that mean each writer is using a formula to make his stories? Or does it mean they've just found a way that works and, by coincidence, the formula agrees?

I'd say both. This is dangerous for things sounding too artificial, but valuable as a guideline when things get mired.
 

Calliopenjo

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[FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif][FONT=times new roman,new york,times,serif]Hi Uncle Jim,

I think just because it's Friday, my brain's reading TILT TILT TILT TILT. Either that or the green ooze you see in the corner of the room is my brain declaring a break. Anywho, I need a word that sounds like gathered. Here's the sentence. Diane stepped down from the podium, and Leigh gathered her together and left the cemetary. Gathered her together sounds terrible. If you have any ideas for another word or phrase I'm open to them. (On hands and knees begging.)
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LOG

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'Diane stepped down from the podium, and Leigh collected herself and left the cemetery.'
Cemetery is spelt with an 'e' near the end.
I wasn't sure of your tense,
'Diane had stepped down from the podium, so Leigh collected herself and left the cemetery.'
May also fit, sounds better to me, but I edited it so I'm biased. :tongue
 

smsarber

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Calli, maybe you could give us the whole paragraph? Because the way it reads to me, it sounds like Leigh collected the dismembered body parts of "her." Sorry, it's just how "collected" make such a short example sound to me. I'm a sicko, I know!
 

FennelGiraffe

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[FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif][FONT=times new roman,new york,times,serif] Diane stepped down from the podium, and Leigh gathered her together and left the cemetary.[/FONT][/FONT][/FONT]

I can't tell what you're trying to say. Who is "her": Diane or Leigh? Either way, "gather... together" implies there are several people or things involved. As a separate issue, the two "ands" are a bit awkward.

Diane stepped down from the podium, and Leigh escorted her out of the cemetery.

Diane stepped down from the podium, so Leigh pulled herself together and left the cemetery.

After Diane stepped down from the podium, Leigh collected her belongings and left the cemetery.
 

Calliopenjo

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The "her" refers to Diane. Gathered together to me creates a mental image of someone using a dustpan and brush to collect everything.

The events preceding that sentence are that Diane finished giving her eulogy. Leigh sat in the audience waiting for Diane to finish. So as Diane stepped down from the podium. . .

The story is still in its rough stages. I got stuck and couldn't think.
 

James D. Macdonald

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A word that sounds like gathered? Lathered? Blathered?


Diane stepped down from the podium, and Leigh gathered her together and left the cemetary.


As Leigh watched, Diane step from the podium. The younger woman gathered her emotions like a housewife sweeping up the shards of an antique vase, pulled her hat low across her forehead, and left the cemetery.
 

Neversage

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How do you avoid redundancy in referring to a nameless character?

My dilemma is a short skirmish between my protagonist and a highwayman. To get through my draft, I just kept referring to him as "the highwayman," but this is awful to read over and over. There is no reason for my protagonist to know this man's name, and things like "the taller man," run dry quickly. Any ideas?
 

Calliopenjo

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How do you avoid redundancy in referring to a nameless character?

My dilemma is a short skirmish between my protagonist and a highwayman. To get through my draft, I just kept referring to him as "the highwayman," but this is awful to read over and over. There is no reason for my protagonist to know this man's name, and things like "the taller man," run dry quickly. Any ideas?

How about if your protagonist gives the "highwayman" a nickname that only they know. Ex: I'll call him John after the character in Highway to Heaven. He might not be an angel but he is just as mysterious.
 

Chris Grey

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A highwayman is a knight of the road, or knight of the moon, depending on who you'd ask. It's an armed man who robs travelers on the road. Rarely alone. A bit common in England around the 16th century.

As to how to handle it, I'd say the same way you'd handle a named character. Pronouns where it won't be confusing, and carefully resorting to a distant cousin (once removed) of the saidism: his foe, his adversary, the bandit, the stranger, etc.

The highwayman swung wide, but John read his attack and ducked clean of the blade. He pushed off with his legs, lunging hard at his adversary's exposed stomach. John saw a glint of steel emerge from the bandit's cloak and only barely dodged his foe's pistol.

Additional identifiers can be derived from physical or other identifying characteristics (the tall man, the Frenchman, the dwarf, the gaily-clad rogue).

Stinks of saidisms, but whatcha gonna do?
 

Neversage

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Thanks, Chris. I'll try it that way. It's a short sequence, but part of the opening, so it naturally needs to be fluid enough to keep the reader in the action.
 

James D. Macdonald

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The Highwayman by Alfred Noyes

Beware the Burly Detective Syndrome.

"Burly Detective" Syndrome

Fear of proper names. Found in most of the same pulp magazines that abound with "said" bookisms and Tom Swifties. This is where you can't call Mike Shayne "Shayne" but substitute "the burly detective" or "the red-headed sleuth." Like the "said" bookish it comes from the entirely wrong-headed conviction that you can't use the same word twice in the same sentence, paragraph, or even page. This is only true of particularly strong and highly visible words, like, say, "vertiginous." It's always better to re-use an ordinary, simple noun or verb rather than contrive a cumbersome method of avoiding it.
 
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Neversage

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Uncle Jim appears... and complicates my plans with his wisdom.

It's nice to know that going overboard with this has a term. The Burly Detective Syndrome seems to be part of what gave the Eye of Argon it's magical ability to make even the stoutest reader want to laugh through their vomit.
 

Calliopenjo

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Change of perspective

Uncle Jim,

I have a question. Is it possible to change perspectives in the same story? You see, the perspective I have been using, Arrosa, would no longer be valid because her fledgling, Briallen, was taken back to the mortal world by Linus who is Briallen's father. What I was thinking was for the next chapter write from Briallen's perspective about the events that happened while she was with her father. At the same time though, I don't want to confuse the reader. Can it be done?
 

euclid

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I'm in a bit of a quandary, here.

I am told by the experts (UK editors) that publishers in UK look for at least 100,000 words in an adult novel. But I believe US publishers look for less (up to 90,000?).

My book is 106,500 words long.
I have been pitching the book at both UK and US agents.

Should I shorten it? It would be a major Heraclean task, but I suppose it could be done.
If I did shorten it, should I then continue to pitch the longer version in UK while pitching the shorter version in US?
 

allenparker

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It may be just me...

I'm in a bit of a quandary, here.



Should I shorten it? It would be a major Heraclean task, but I suppose it could be done.

This may be just me, but I find that if I can shorten the story and still tell the story, I have to shorten it to make it better. When there is a possibility of making the story tighter, more compact and keep the flow, color, and voice of the story in tact, I make the story a better read.

The trouble, I think, is knowing when you are not disturbing the world you are creating by lowering the word count.
 

Perle_Rare

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My inexpert guess would be that if trimming 6,500 words makes the story better, then trim.


If this is the incorrect answer, then it's proof that I never understood anything and that I would benefit from reading Uncle Jim's thread from the first post again... :Shrug:
 
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