BS your way through

BarII · Sep 26, 2015

Because butterfly nets don't go on sale until spring and bear traps don't work on moths.

Sometimes spit comes pouring or shooting out of my mouth when I yawn. What's that a sign of?

Russ Mars · Sep 27, 2015

That's referred to as a "gleek" and it's a normal thing during your present phase.

What, exactly, were the Brothers Wright about?

jaus tail · Sep 27, 2015

They were right about the fact that world is better without humans.

why do people make noise on street and don't care about silence that others need?

Pony. · Sep 27, 2015

They do care about the silence others need, they just don't care about what you need. A suggestion to help with that; stop giving out pennies and dental floss for Halloween.

How much quiet does Jaus need, really?

Russ Mars · Sep 27, 2015

According to doctors, Jaus needs so much quiet, permanent silencing is not out of the question.

Who's going to win the World Series this year?

Pony. · Sep 27, 2015

I AM!!! (Let hedge some bets now before they decide I'm too old to play, we'll make a killing)

What odds in Vegas giving on me?

BarII · Sep 27, 2015

They're calling it "one" in an effort to confuse people so they don't accidently bet on you.

If I reinforce an umbrella with twine how far could I safely fall?

C.bronco · Sep 27, 2015

2.3 meters. I stick by that claim.

Would it be wise for youthful bachelors to avoid potty mouthed parrots as companions if they are looking to find a mate?

Russ Mars · Sep 27, 2015

Absolutely not! The "youthful bachelors" are the ones who taught the parrots.

What is the most difficult animal to train, and why?

Nymtoc · Sep 27, 2015

The frumious Bandersnatch is the most difficult animal to train, partly because it is so frumious, and partly because it is so difficult to find.

Tonight the moon is blood red! How much time do we have before the Apocalypse begins?

Pony. · Sep 27, 2015

I looked and it's not anywhere near blood red. I'm actually rather disappointed in this alleged 'blood moon', I don't think we get an apocalypse for this. Maybe a new civil war on some far off corner of the world, but no apocalypse.

If everyone on the planet were to stand on the same side would every thing tilt to that side?

BarII · Sep 27, 2015

Only if everyone wore their winter clothes.

Today NASA's announcing something. What?

Russ Mars · Sep 27, 2015

NASA announced that they were joining the government in the winter clothes experiment, hoping to tilt the planet.

Just what is all this talk I've been hearing about blue pajamas?

Pony. · Sep 28, 2015

Its all hogwash, they're just trying to get people to quit sleeping nekkid.
(naked just means you have no clothes on. Nekkid means you have no clothes on and you're up to something)

Why do cats and dogs have trouble getting along?

DreamWeaver · Sep 28, 2015

They take after their owners.

Why do cats smile when they're mad?

Pony. · Sep 28, 2015

It's not a full smile, it's really just a maniacal grin foreshadowing their evil plot to take over the world and rule humanity. And they're starting at your house.

Why do people get all agaw over babies? It's just another person, only smaller.

Nymtoc · Sep 28, 2015

Because babies are so cute, and they gurgle and burble and slurp and drool and soil their didees and keep you up all night and...oh, they're just so cute!

Why doesn't Pony like babies?

Pony. · Sep 28, 2015

They stink and I value my sleep.

What is the best way to get rid of finger prints at a crime scene?

Russ Mars · Sep 28, 2015

Man, I told you not to bring this up in public! We'll discuss it privately--damn, sometimes I think you want to get caught.

Why are cats so picky about food?

Pony. · Sep 28, 2015

Because cats actually have taste. Buy generic and get the cold shoulder, they want the good stuff.

Why aren't mice sold as interactive cat toys?

BarII · Sep 28, 2015

Because snakes don't want to share.

What's below cheese on the food chain?

Pony. · Sep 28, 2015

More cheese and then everything else

If you're filthy rich do you have to launder your money more frequently?

C.bronco · Sep 28, 2015

You do actually, because it gets dirty from rolling around in it.

If I don't look the puppy in the eye, will I have a few moments to myself?

Pony. · Sep 28, 2015

Nope. That time to yourself thing ended with the first child. Even though you didn't give birth to it, a puppy counts as an aditional child. You won't have time to yourself again until they are all grown.

Was it worth it?

ErezMA · Sep 29, 2015

Pony. said:
Nope. That time to yourself thing ended with the first child. Even though you didn't give birth to it, a puppy counts as an aditional child. You won't have time to yourself again until they are all grown.

Was it worth it?

For the puppies, anything is worth it.

When is PEMDAS not useful in solving your problems?

BS your way through

Interesting little planet you've got here.

Aspiring supervillain

Interesting little planet you've got here.

Aspiring supervillain

I have plans...

Interesting little planet you've got here.

Benefactor Member

Aspiring supervillain

Interesting little planet you've got here.

Aspiring supervillain

Shakespearean Fool

Aspiring supervillain

Benefactor Member

Aspiring supervillain

Interesting little planet you've got here.

Aspiring supervillain

Aspiring supervillain

I have plans...

Aspiring supervillain