BS your way through

There are people who dont like mushrooms?????? You're making that up.
oh yeah,the pool... 506,880,000tsp. No joke,I did the math. 660,000 gallons in an Olympic pool,768tsp in a gallon 660,000 x 768 = 506,880,000.

seriously, who wants a kitten? Ive got 9. 4 black(1 boy 3 girls) 2 torties, 1 dilute tortie, 1 gray, and 1 gray tiger.

Well, since I'm sure we're talking about an Olympic swimming pool for squirrels, that would be half a teaspoon of water, 10 cups of nuts, lightly salted, and a dash of cinnamon. Because squirrels like wading through nuts. As long as it's the variety kind.

Why do squirrels squeak?

I'm confused so I'll answer both of you. Pony - why didn't you neuter the horny thing? You can two-for-one coupons at the local chop shop.

Tiddly - it's all do with how hard we squeeze you - you adorable, vicious little thing, you.

Everyone - can you guess what Artemissed means?

Artemissed..... Hmmmmm ,I'm guessing it either has something to do with the Olympian goddess of hunting, wilderness and wild animals.
Or the Windows based computer game


They're fosters. I clean up after them, I feed them, I get them vetted(spay/neutered,vax,wormed) and then i send them on their merry little way. Its my wifes gig, I just get stuck doing all the dirty work.

So, how many kittens can i dump....I mean rehome with you? Ireland doesnt have enough cats to keep those snakes down.

All of them. Between the owls and the coyotes, we can't grow cats fast enough.

What part of "this is not a smorgasbord" did they not understand?

Reziac said:

What part of "this is not a smorgasbord" did they not understand?

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After having heavily researched this topic using Altavista, we have some exciting results. It turns out that 90% of the people who were told "This is not a smorgasbord" actually heard "Please eat this, it is nourishing and plentiful." due to a vestibular disorder known as Cochlear Dysphoria Disorder.

The remaining 10% of those who were reported turned out to not have properly functioning amygdalas, paired with mild kleptomania. They truly are to be pitied.




When dealing with the expulsion of unwelcome house guests, which method is best to boot their posteriors from your interior?

The easiest way is to get a bow and arrows, instruct them to put an apple on their head and say " I saw this in a movie once,but I'm pretty sure I can do it."They'll usually leave on their own after that. If not, paramedics will take them away.

How many revisions are in a revised?

It depends on how gifted a seer you are, and whether or not you suffer from double vision.

Do double rainbows end in double pots of gold?

You would think so, but actually it's a U-turn. The pot of gold is back at the beginning.

So, does Nyan Cat actually poop rainbows, fart rainbows, or is that simply exhaust from its poptart jetpack?

I'm going to go with poptart exhaust.


how many dead bad guys do i need in my story line?

Dead bad guys won't do you any good in your storyline. You need live bad guys, or at the least undead bad guys.

On the same theme, how bad do bad guys need to be?

Well, that depends on who your bad guys are and how good your good guys are. Because, lets face it, it's all a matter of perspective. One side is being attacked the other isn't. Are you or are you not rooting for the Vikings?

There's a theory that Santa is actually Odin. Do you buy it?

No. Santa isn't ruthless enough. Odin is allfather.

Why don't cats like other cats?

Its not that they don't like other cats, they're just being catty

how many writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Pony. said:

Its not that they don't like other cats, they're just being catty

how many writers does it take to change a light bulb?

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Writers don't change light bulbs. Being totally cerebral, they are incompetent at anything requiring manual dexterity. They call maintenance (or pay some kid a buck) to change light bulbs.

What would life be like if there were no fast-food restaurants?

Fast food is kind of an oxymoron. Mc Donalds is supposed to have a 90 second window from ordering your food to getting your food. Not only do they not make the 90 seconds its often upwards of 10 minutes and then its hit or miss if you actually get what you ordered. So that's another five to ten minutes waiting for your order to be corrected(and why I don't bother with them anymore) So I'm thinking if life changes at all it wont be by much.


Does anyone have an eraser I can borrow? My backspace key isn't working.

You can borrow it, but it'll only erase up to five hundred characters. My eraser is running thin.

Why is Chilis all about that baby back ribs? Wouldn't there be more meat with the adult back ribs?

No- because baby fat.

Why is Internet Explorer the most reliable browser ever?

Because he can't rely on Firefox or Chrome to fail like IE can.

Why isn't pi exactly three?

Gotta have leftovers. It's pi.

How many decimal places does ice cream add to pi a la mode?

3:41..............

why isn't blueberry pie a la mode a national breafast?

C.bronco said:

why isn't blueberry pie a la mode a national breafast?

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It is a national breakfast in Khzachiberristan, which you may (or may not) find on a map, but only on Mondays. The rest of the week, breakfast is goat cheese and beer.

Why do I need a license to drive? Isn't driving my right under the First Amendment?

No. If anything, the motor is free speech to the car, but cars aren't citizens.

Why aren't cars citizens?

They are underrepresented in the Constitution. I wish Doc Hudson were here; he'd clear that up in no time.

Racing: one should not have to pay extra cable fees to see NASCAR. Am I correct?

You could always just go to the race and watch in person.

whats the easiest way to confuse a nascar fan? (Hint: turn right)