Want you don't expect to hear from your new manager...

"Here. Hold this a minute."

(Said while unzipping fly...)

tourdeforce said:

"The names Billy but I prefer if you call me Thrilly".

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And how is it that you know everyone so well here?

maestrowork said:

"We made a mistake. We wanted the other guy."

"Sorry, didn't realize we had to hire that n**** instead of you."

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That happened to me once. For real. When I got there they asked me what my name was and told me they asked my friend Kerry to come in for work not Terri. They had our names mixed up with the face.

I was really embarrassed. They let me stay though.

"Do you like my mistletoe belt buckle?"

eldragon said:

"Do you like my mistletoe belt buckle?"

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Spooky, you'll like this. At one of my first big IT jobs (MIS manager of a small real-estate firm), the final "clinching" question at the interview was "My granddaughter likes this game "Doom" but I can't get it on my computer at work. Can you install this for me?"

dclary said:

"Wow, I'm glad they hired someone to replace the last guy. Work has really been piling up since the funeral."

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This actually just happened where I work. Our purchasing manager (in his late fifties) had a massive stroke and died a few days later. The guy we hired to replace him didn't find out this morsel of information until his second day. When the new guy (kind of jokingly) asked me if he had made a mistake taking the job, I replied, "Do you meditate? You should really learn how to meditate."

"Whoa, Gawd, you look just like the guy I beat the crap out of at the bar last night!"

Well, that was my first big IT job... and a year later when I was interviewing for a better one, I realized just how poorly I was being compensated.

"What are your salary requirements?"

"Well, I'm making 27,000 now, so I'd like to make at least that."

(He actually laughed in my face.)

"That shouldn't be a problem. I don't think we're allowed to pay that little."

-- The offer came in at 35K.