Stupid things non-writers say

Status
Not open for further replies.

benluby

practical experience, FTW
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 22, 2012
Messages
713
Reaction score
62
Location
Georgia!!
I've been living in Iqaluit (in the High Arctic) for nearly eight months now, and today was the second time someone told me, "Maybe you'll write a book about your experiences some day!"

It... doesn't really work like that, so I said, "I don't write non-fiction."

"Oh." The other person was not deterred. "Well, maybe you could write something fictional about the Arctic."

I really don't want to offend people who enjoy living here (I didn't) so I said, "Yeah, maybe" and changed the subject. I think I'll just do that from now on if ever anyone gets the idea that living in a place automatically means a writer can produce a book about that place.

They published Fifty Shades of Grey, so what makes you think a story about the Arctic wouldn't sell?
You could make it a romance/horror novel. Couple reading the Kama Sutra, suddenly the heat goes out. With their genitals frozen together, they must work together to relight the heater before death (or worse, the Viagra wears off) occurs!!

(Yeah, I'm going to hell.)
 

Write_Askew

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 19, 2012
Messages
143
Reaction score
12
Location
Missouri
Sorry your family just kinda sat there and said nothing. :( Not cool. My SIL is like this too, always cutting others down to make herself feel a more adequate human being. Tall poppy syndrome is an ugly personality trait.

Actually, they got in there eventually. I'm pretty well known in my family for my spectacular temper. My goal over the last two years has been to get it under control. I think they thought I would blow up...:D I like that term, 'tall poppy syndrome' I'm going to have to remember it.

If it is any comfort, I'm married to a serious horror fan. I don't think your genre is is much more danger than mine.;)
 

lolchemist

Shooting stars.
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Mar 14, 2012
Messages
1,334
Reaction score
183
Location
California
No! I'd love to read a story set in the Arctic! Especially the way daylight works over there with the sun being out either a crazy long time or a crazy short time! Just as long as it's not a vampire story or anything like that. In the fantasy story I'm writing I actually have a location like that! One day I want to visit either one of those Scandinavian countries or Alaska just so I can experience it for myself! (Sorry this is becoming a bit OT now!)
 

Write_Askew

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 19, 2012
Messages
143
Reaction score
12
Location
Missouri
They published Fifty Shades of Grey, so what makes you think a story about the Arctic wouldn't sell?
You could make it a romance/horror novel. Couple reading the Kama Sutra, suddenly the heat goes out. With their genitals frozen together, they must work together to relight the heater before death (or worse, the Viagra wears off) occurs!!

(Yeah, I'm going to hell.)

First off- :roll: That made my day.

I'm working on a romance saga right now. I wanted to place one of the books during the Alaskan Gold rush. Its not the Arctic, but it does get pretty cold up there. You just gave me a huge laugh. Now I'm going to have to fight to not put a scene like that in there just for giggles. Thanks for that. :D
 

Stacia Kane

Girl Detective
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 23, 2006
Messages
8,142
Reaction score
2,668
Location
In cahoots with the other boo-birds
Website
www.staciakane.com
No! I'd love to read a story set in the Arctic! Especially the way daylight works over there with the sun being out either a crazy long time or a crazy short time! Just as long as it's not a vampire story or anything like that. In the fantasy story I'm writing I actually have a location like that! One day I want to visit either one of those Scandinavian countries or Alaska just so I can experience it for myself! (Sorry this is becoming a bit OT now!)


DARK MATTER is a ghost story, and a genuinely creepy one (it's also historical). I highly recommend it.
 

Erin Latimer

Stay in and write.
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Sep 12, 2011
Messages
322
Reaction score
10
Location
Vancouver, BC
"Lady porn", ugh. That is SO rude. I hope you told him he was being RUDE. I can't abide rudeness...

I'm noticing a common thread in this thread...people who have husbands or wives that don't read! I guess opposites really do attract! It drives me batty, because my husband hates reading. He has never read any of my work and he doesn't show much interest in ever reading them either. He says, "I'll read them when you get published". He said it in front of my good friend (and fellow writer) and she tore a good old chunk out of him. Hehehe. :D

It's hard when your "better half" and your family doesn't understand the publishing industry at ALL. I have family that keep asking me "how is the book coming? Is it out yet?" And I have the same answer every time, "not yet, still working on revisions." And they say maybe something is wrong, or maybe you should self publish, ect. Most of the time I'm happy to talk about it, but lately it's at a point where I hope no one asks!
 

shaldna

The cake is a lie. But still cake.
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 12, 2009
Messages
7,485
Reaction score
897
Location
Belfast
No! I'd love to read a story set in the Arctic! Especially the way daylight works over there with the sun being out either a crazy long time or a crazy short time! Just as long as it's not a vampire story or anything like that. In the fantasy story I'm writing I actually have a location like that! One day I want to visit either one of those Scandinavian countries or Alaska just so I can experience it for myself! (Sorry this is becoming a bit OT now!)


Blood and Ice was a pretty good vampire book that kicked off in the ice.
 

wampuscat

Recovering adjective addict
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 5, 2011
Messages
3,130
Reaction score
410
"Lady porn", ugh. That is SO rude. I hope you told him he was being RUDE. I can't abide rudeness...

I'm noticing a common thread in this thread...people who have husbands or wives that don't read! I guess opposites really do attract! It drives me batty, because my husband hates reading. He has never read any of my work and he doesn't show much interest in ever reading them either. He says, "I'll read them when you get published". He said it in front of my good friend (and fellow writer) and she tore a good old chunk out of him. Hehehe. :D

It's hard when your "better half" and your family doesn't understand the publishing industry at ALL. I have family that keep asking me "how is the book coming? Is it out yet?" And I have the same answer every time, "not yet, still working on revisions." And they say maybe something is wrong, or maybe you should self publish, ect. Most of the time I'm happy to talk about it, but lately it's at a point where I hope no one asks!

My hubby doesn't read much either. And he does say dumb things about writing on occasion (When you publish your first book and buy a new car...When you make your first million...) He knows it doesn't really work that way. He just says that's how much faith he has in me. Sigh. I've pretty much stopped telling anyone except my writing group about my work.

That said, hubby does watch a lot of movies and has really good ideas about plots. He's actually been quite helpful with brainstorming a time or two.
 

Erin Latimer

Stay in and write.
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Sep 12, 2011
Messages
322
Reaction score
10
Location
Vancouver, BC
I actually bounced plot ideas off him for the first time yesturday! And he actually had a few good ideas! I was so proud :D
 

wazzujim

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jan 7, 2013
Messages
117
Reaction score
5
Location
Virginia
I try to stay away from writing topics, but a month ago my aunt asked the title of my book. I told her the title with others sitting around and she said, along with another, “What? I don’t know that word. I don’t like the title, so you need to change it.” Being the smart a$$ I am I responded, “I don’t care whether you like it or not. If you don’t know the word, you definitely aren’t part of my target audience.” She shut up, we moved onto another topic and I doubt we will be discussing my book again.

Too funny!
 

frankiebrown

Simplify.
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Apr 16, 2012
Messages
945
Reaction score
204
Location
Georgia
"What are you doing tonight?" interchangeably with, "What did you do last night?"

Read. Write.

That ends the conversation.
 

Waffles

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 1, 2011
Messages
64
Reaction score
9
Location
Texas
These are not stupid things really but...sigh. I'm in the query stage which means lots of rejections. Sometimes a read request and then a rejection. I am getting very tired of well-meaning friends and family trying to cheer me up by saying things like:

"At least you finished! Lots of people never finish! That's something!"

"You had the courage to show your work to someone! That's something!"

It's annoying and frankly, it's getting to be condescending. Like it's wrong to be unhappy when you get rejected. I think it's okay to let yourself feel disappointed for a bit before moving on. I've stopped talking about my writing altogether actually, because I'm just tired of having to explain the process (again).

Oh and this should amuse you - I write screenplays and sometimes people will tell me "well maybe you should just write a novel instead!"

Not stupid either, just uninformed.
 

allmywires

Rock-licker
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
81
Reaction score
11
Location
UK
It's not really a stupid thing but it annoys me no end anyway:

Me: I've written a book, bla blah...

Other person: Oh, cool! How many pages is it?

Arrgh, it's not done in pages, it's word count, and that doesn't mean anything to them except 100k is 'a lot of essays'. Another good one, when I say how much writing I've done in a day (2 or 3k sometimes): well then you should be able to write this essay in a day too!

Um, no. Just no. :p
 

sennydreadful

X-Box Fancier
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jan 13, 2013
Messages
72
Reaction score
5
Location
London
Website
sennydreadful.com
I've gotten this one. My response:

I think 50 Shades is the only thing preventing Twilight from being the worst popular fiction of the last century, why do you ask?

Worth it to see the horror on their faces as if I'd accused them of eating puppies.

I've been asked if I've read 50 Shades at least 5 times now. The first time I got into a fierce argument because the person wouldn't believe that it was Twilight fanfiction, and since then I just shake my head and make a strangulated face.

(also, Hi Blake! *waves* Fancy seeing you here, innit?) ;)

Conversation I had the other day:

"So what do you write?"
"Um, fantasy, actually. Um." (I'm not good at talking about it)
"Ah." Knowing nod. "Like Harry Potter."

Noooo, not like Harry Potter. I love Potter, but not all fantasy is boarding school and boy wizards.
 

allmywires

Rock-licker
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
81
Reaction score
11
Location
UK
Conversation I had the other day:

"So what do you write?"
"Um, fantasy, actually. Um." (I'm not good at talking about it)
"Ah." Knowing nod. "Like Harry Potter."

Noooo, not like Harry Potter. I love Potter, but not all fantasy is boarding school and boy wizards.

See, I get, 'Oh, like Lord of the Rings?'

Sigh.
 

allmywires

Rock-licker
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
81
Reaction score
11
Location
UK
I don't think enough of my friends/acquaintances have heard of enough fantasy series to get me any points :p These days, Game of Thrones and LOTR are pretty much it!
 

RichardGarfinkle

Nurture Phoenixes
Staff member
Moderator
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jan 2, 2012
Messages
11,140
Reaction score
3,082
Location
Walking the Underworld
Website
www.richardgarfinkle.com
It's not really a stupid thing but it annoys me no end anyway:

Me: I've written a book, bla blah...

Other person: Oh, cool! How many pages is it?

Arrgh, it's not done in pages, it's word count, and that doesn't mean anything to them except 100k is 'a lot of essays'. Another good one, when I say how much writing I've done in a day (2 or 3k sometimes): well then you should be able to write this essay in a day too!

Um, no. Just no. :p


I don't think this is actually a stupid thing. Word count is a writer's measure of length. Page count translates more intuitively to book length in a reader's mind.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.