SciFi/Fantasy First Line Game

Addicting the werewolf population to disco in order to cut down the lines in the Otherworld Unemployment Office was, inarguably, the vampires greatest triumph to date.

I was deflowered once on Earth, and again on Saturn during the summer camp jamboree.

It was growing dark and the Phoenix-Day celebration was winding down to only its drunkest attendees when the lumbering groan of the Golem sounded in the murky distance.

Last night I dreamt I went to Super Android Destructo Derby again.

As they carried me off the battlefield toward the triage armored hospital vehicle, I tried to come to terms with the robotic surgeons that would be cutting on me.

They say it was magic that scarred the Earth and sunk the Old Castle into the waters of Kelad. I guess that's why they banned it.

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I knew my day was about to get worse when the door opened before me under the hand of a skeleton that appeared to be wearing a floral kitchen apron.

EDIT: I know the first one is two lines, but I got called out on the semi-colon usage. I'm so ashamed...

badducky said:

Never date your own laptop computer.

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"Laptop", hur, hur.

Dad found me hours later with my wrists slit, then spent the next hour explaining why I wasn't going to die this time.

I still have the test tube I was made in.

When I accepted the job, I had no idea I'd be artificially inseminating alien hybrids.

I really should have read the fine print on the voluntary organ donor card.

badducky said:

I will never marry a man if he has wings and horns.

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Ooh! Ooh! I have the sequel!

I will never again marry a man if he has wings and horns.

Euan H. said:

Of course, dying for the third time was easier.

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Death by shotgun blast is always messy, even when its an android.

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My cousin Ralph was born with an extra eye located on the back of his neck, and he became an excellent traffic cop - all the more reason to wonder why my ability to breathe fire had never found its niche.

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Really good ones!

Zeena's clunky, metalic arms reached up and awkwardly groped the air where her head should've been.

I was a popcorn dealer on Otimus Secondus, until I realized that butter was poison to the locals.

I could have overlooked the fact that the guy had six extra belly buttons, but not that they were all outties.

I poured transmission fluid into George.

(Cheating slightly, I just posted this on Twitter's #11words.)

Seriously, don't go to that graveyard without your wedding band on.

Natasha has serious relationship issues; she was born a powerful empath to a mother who is a psychic vampire.

Thursday again? It has been the ninth time this week!