I don't really know where to start.

I feel like I should be grateful because at least I was published via a big trade publisher like I always wanted. But I'm just feeling so dejected right now.

I spent years wanting to be a writer and trying to get an agent, trying to get an editor and finally I'm published. I've got a whole series out that's pretty much done now. The books find their way into bookshelves at bookstores and I know not everyone has that.

But at the same time I also know the books aren't really selling. Barely anyone knows they exist. All the money that was spent into marketing dried up as soon as the first book released. And I've been trying hard to promote myself but nobody seems to care. Barely anyone is reviewing the books on goodreads or amazon. It's just like the books are a complete non-factor.

It's not that they're not good, I've gotten great reviews. I'm just being passed over. It just makes me wonder when I see the books of authors that got a massive push and a huge fandom and are going on tours and signing movie deals - is my work really that much worse than theirs? I really don't think it is, so why the difference?

What hurts the most is that some big name author with a huge fan base and lots of connections in the industry recently got a deal for a book series that's basically the same as mine in pitch and I know it's going to do far better simply because he's built up his name over the years.

I guess I just feel like it never ends. You get dejected because of so many things along the way as a writer. I guess I shouldn't look at other people's success and feel down on myself but I can't help but wonder why I'm stuck in this rut.