Hi there- I'm a first-time author so I've been trying my best to learn everything I can about getting a book published, but obviously there is still much for me to learn.
I have sent out many, many queries to agents over the past several months but no one has ever requested follow-up material, which I've heard generally means the query letter is not strong enough. I've copied it down here. I'd love suggestions on how to improve it!
Dear ____________,
I am seeking representation for WHAT IT TAKES TO LOSE, a 56,000-word young adult novel.
When Eve Allred, a sarcastic but kindhearted high school junior, loses ten pounds, she is intoxicated with the compliments and praise she receives. Then Ana shows up. Ana, the beautiful and strikingly skinny girl who seems to appear out of nowhere, insists Eve isn’t done losing weight, and for reasons she can’t comprehend, Eve feels an uncontrollable urge to obey her. Ten pounds quickly turns to twenty, which turns to fifty.
Months of hospitalization and rehab later, Eve is ready to get better. But even the smallest tasks prove difficult when Ana, the friend Eve wishes she never had, has other plans. Trying to transition back to her normal life, Eve struggles with repairing broken relationships with friends and family while attempting to distance herself from Ana, who no one else seems to care about. Early in her recovery Eve also runs into a boy at school who gives her a tormented, pain-filled gaze that haunts her thoughts. Several more encounters with the boy and the same tortured look make Eve even more desperate to figure out how she is causing this stranger so much pain.
Eve’s struggle to balance everything—the boy, trying to recreate her old life, and vicious Ana—provides a unique look at what recovering from an eating disorder is like, and proves our battles aren’t always visible to others.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
Anne Taylor
I have sent out many, many queries to agents over the past several months but no one has ever requested follow-up material, which I've heard generally means the query letter is not strong enough. I've copied it down here. I'd love suggestions on how to improve it!
Dear ____________,
I am seeking representation for WHAT IT TAKES TO LOSE, a 56,000-word young adult novel.
When Eve Allred, a sarcastic but kindhearted high school junior, loses ten pounds, she is intoxicated with the compliments and praise she receives. Then Ana shows up. Ana, the beautiful and strikingly skinny girl who seems to appear out of nowhere, insists Eve isn’t done losing weight, and for reasons she can’t comprehend, Eve feels an uncontrollable urge to obey her. Ten pounds quickly turns to twenty, which turns to fifty.
Months of hospitalization and rehab later, Eve is ready to get better. But even the smallest tasks prove difficult when Ana, the friend Eve wishes she never had, has other plans. Trying to transition back to her normal life, Eve struggles with repairing broken relationships with friends and family while attempting to distance herself from Ana, who no one else seems to care about. Early in her recovery Eve also runs into a boy at school who gives her a tormented, pain-filled gaze that haunts her thoughts. Several more encounters with the boy and the same tortured look make Eve even more desperate to figure out how she is causing this stranger so much pain.
Eve’s struggle to balance everything—the boy, trying to recreate her old life, and vicious Ana—provides a unique look at what recovering from an eating disorder is like, and proves our battles aren’t always visible to others.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
Anne Taylor
