I appreciate your honesty, and response. And while I don't want to argue my book in an open forum and I do appreciate your opinion, I also want want to point out that I think you may have been skimming what I wrote. Or somehow missed something.
I made my living for nearly two decades by editing non-fiction books. I don't skim. I don't miss things. I notice when things aren't working in a book, and I find reasons and solutions for those problems. It's what I do.
I also have a lot of experience with depression, and have worked on self-help books and more academic works which focus on depression and anxiety.
I understand that it's hard to hear that your book needs work. But you asked me to explain what problems I found in it, I did, and now you're telling me I skimmed or missed things? That's not good.
I AM one of those people who is both horrified of doctors, and while in the throes of depression - was completely unable to make or keep an appointment. I make quick mention of that in "My Story." My "How To Do It" in the first section addresses exactly what you're saying I don't address. I speak from experience telling someone suffering that it's OK to have someone else make the appointment FOR you, that there's no shame in that. I suggest if it's truly overwhelming to break it up into little, more do-able steps. I offer other alternatives also, for people who have nobody to help them. I'll add that I'm intentionally brief in my suggestions because I'm respecting that the reader will use these tools as a springboard toward their recovery. Not assuming I know best, nor that I can fix anybody. Just offering suggestions that work for me and I know have worked for others.
I agree there's no shame in asking someone else to help; and I agree that it can sometimes be helpful to break tasks down into smaller, more manageable tasks. I didn't suggest otherwise. I think you missed my point.
What I saw in your book was you telling people what worked for you. That's fine. But you don't seem to recognise that other people might find even those things impossible, that your tactics might not work for other people, and that other people live in different ways to you. And I suspect that those issues are rooted in your lack of real expertise in the subject. You only know the things you know. You don't know what you don't know, and so you don't know what you're missing and getting wrong. (That's not the most elegant of phrasings--sorry.)
I may be too thin skinned for this place. I may not be a writer - I'm actually a musician who just likes to write. I'm happy I got this book out there and I hope it helps the people I intended it for. So far it seems like it is.
I have the deepest respect and admiration for the people who are truly writers and spend their lives honing their craft. Not just blowin sunshine either. A lot I'd like to say regarding my fitting or not fitting into that world, but I'll leave it this for now. I know I still have much to learn.
I think you might be a writer. But I think that this probably wasn't the right book for you to write. It's not your field.
When I was small my mother--who was a musician--sent me to piano lessons and I hated it. I hated the lessons, I couldn't do the practise, I didn't understand what was being asked from me, my hands were too small to span more than a few notes. I was miserable. I consequently am in awe of people who can play music, and understand some of what they have to go through to get any level of expertise. I would not even think about writing a book about how to learn to play the piano, because I understand that I don't have the knowledge or expertise to do it. Think about how you'd feel if a non-musician like me wrote a book about how to be a better musician. You'd see all the holes in it. All the things I didn't know to include. All it would contain are the things I've seen, from my very limited experience of the issue.
Do you see what I'm getting at?
But don't worry. All is not lost. Read on!
I'm taking into consideration all that's been said to me yesterday and today from people here, and now want to express myself.
As mentioned earlier, I'm a musician. I'm a fairly successful one too. I've gotten to play with some well known people, tour around the world, and live out some of my childhood fantasies. I currently earn my living doing what I love most, and I can't even begin to tell how grateful I am regarding that. I'm not bragging about any of this as I don't believe my success is based on my talent. It's based on my hard work, commitment, and good attitude.
There you go. That's your platform, your expertise. Couple your huge musical experience and talent and reputation with your experience of depression and the ways you worked your way out of it and you've got a potentially wonderful, beautiful book. That could make a fantastic memoir. One that I can see agents fighting over.
I never, EVER took a person's creative efforts and did anything in an attempt to discourage or belittle them. As I also said in an earlier post, I'm there (and here) to help whenever I can - not hurt.
I am not trying to discourage or belittle you, and I don't think anyone else is, either. We're just trying to help you improve.
After saying in my OP that I'm already enjoying some success with my book, I've been told in a very short thread: I've got a whole bunch of problems in the first 2 pages alone, I need lots more editing, there's repetition, confusion, there's stuff in my book that was downright patronizing - and now, that if I'm not a licensed professional, psychologist or psychiatrist it's going to weigh heavily on my sales.
Some truths are hard to hear. But that doesn't make them wrong. Those problems ARE in your book, and your lack of expertise in this area is going to have a negative impact on your sales. We could offer you empty encouragement and not help you much, or we could help you make your book the best that it can be, and you'll reap the rewards of that. Having seen the results people have enjoyed from both approaches, I think the latter is better.
Skin maybe not as thick as it could be yet
.
Don't worry. If you keep at this, and get proper feedback and work with good editors, it does get easier. Sleep on it, remind yourself we're trying to help, and take several deep breaths.
Meanwhile, think about what I've said regarding the memoir.
