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Thread: Salutations, cool cats.

  1. #1
    Slightly nervous. Ragtime's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2017
    The Deep South

    Cool Salutations, cool cats.

    Hey youse. I'm just a little bit new here. And I just want you all to know,

    I have a rainbow in my heart
    And a sandwich in my soul.

    I have a little bit of a song for youse. It goes a little bit of a something like this.

    The Rainbow Song:

    Today I fell upon my knees and summoned all my energies
    And found that cosmic rainbow in the sky.

    So now I clap my hands and pray that rainbow will take me away
    To anywhere that I would care to fly.

    (Song over)

    Yesir, that one's a bit of a doozy.

    I must admit, I find myself to be something of a summer soldier. Because when I'm in college, I do schoolwork. That's just a little concern I have about joining these here forums. But since I will have a short commute next semester, I feel that I can probably be more active than I might have been otherwise. And I'm not complaining, either. I know that people have day jobs and activity slows down and whatnot. I'm getting a bit rambly, so I'ma cut it off here.

    Stay wonderful.

  2. #2
    Barricade AW Moderator regdog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    To Punish and Enslave

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  3. #3
    Slightly nervous. Ragtime's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2017
    The Deep South
    Hey regdog!

    Kind of a tough crowd here. Oh well, if I didn't take my intro seriously, I can't expect others to do so either.

    So regdog, it's kind of late asking you this. I consider art to be collaborative at best, and that's obvious here in the SYW parts. But how far does it go? Specifically, if I am critiquing a bit of text, I like to offer a revision for the original artist, instead of just saying what I think is wrong with it. Is that fine?

  4. #4
    Go down road, go pub. Mary Mitchell's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
    Ontario Canada
    Welcome I read your question to regdog, and since regdog may not revisit here, having already welcomed you, I'll give you my own thoughts. (Take them with a grain of salt.)

    There are both styles of critiquing, and they both show up here. One can sometimes feel, "Who am I to criticize if I can't come up with an alternative myself? How is that being helpful?" And alternative suggestions can be helpful. (Of course a complete rewrite would seem presumptuous and be resented, I'm sure.) But the people being critiqued are writers, and presumably have the ability to address issues you raise, even if you don't have a concrete alternative to suggest. It is, after all, a writer's job to be able to do that. If you read through various critiques in the "Show Your Work" forum, you'll see the variety of approaches people take and get a feeling for what you yourself would like to say--and what it's okay not to say, as well.

    Last edited by Mary Mitchell; 06-18-2017 at 10:56 PM.
    It's a simple fact of life that not everyone will be your target audience.

  5. #5
    Benefactor Member E. Steve's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Welcome, Ragtime Mary's response is spot on. Lot of latitude for you here. Critiquing goes both ways. I'm sure you have value to add to the community.

    As a college student, I think you will find a lot of help here with your papers. You will see your writing improve. I was a college prof for 35 years, and wish many of my students had been part of AW before they submitted papers to me.

  6. #6
    practical experience, FTW
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Hi! Thank you for the song; that's sweet of you.


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