Bad Joke Thread
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If Mississippi lends Missouri her New Jersey, what would Delaware?
Idaho, Alaska.
What is every rabbit's favorite capitol city?
Albany!
Idaho, Alaska.
What is every rabbit's favorite capitol city?
Albany!
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A little Native American boy asked his father, "Dad, how did we get our names?"
"Well son," replied the father, "it all has to do with the way you are born. For example, your sister was born in the morning, so we named her Rising Sun. Your brother was born next to a river, so we named him Running Brook. Why do you ask, Broken Rubber?"
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Q. You are American going into the bathroom and American coming out of it. What are you in there?
A. European.
"Well son," replied the father, "it all has to do with the way you are born. For example, your sister was born in the morning, so we named her Rising Sun. Your brother was born next to a river, so we named him Running Brook. Why do you ask, Broken Rubber?"
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Q. You are American going into the bathroom and American coming out of it. What are you in there?
A. European.
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In the version of this that I heard. The village elder chose name of the child based on what he saw on hearing the news, Eagle Soaring, Raging Bull, and the like. 'Why you ask Two Dogs Shagging?'
A mushroom walks into a bar and orders a drink. Bartender says "We don't serve your kind here."
Mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fun guy."
"That's not the problem" said the bartender..."We dont have mush room here"
Mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fun guy."
"That's not the problem" said the bartender..."We dont have mush room here"
Cops stops a guy for speeding and says "I'm giving you two citations, one for speeding and one for driving without your glasses." Driver says, "But officer, I have contacts."
Cop says, "I don't care who you know, you gotta wear your glasses."
That joke is so old, the last time I told it, everyone fell off their dinosaurs laughing.
Cop says, "I don't care who you know, you gotta wear your glasses."
That joke is so old, the last time I told it, everyone fell off their dinosaurs laughing.
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Jose arrived from Mexico for a new life in America. He soon enjoyed many things about his new homeland, often writing to family and friends back in Mexico about his latest American adventures.
One day Jose wanted to see a baseball game but all the seats were full. He spotted a flagpole, climbed it, and accordingly positioned himself at the top. Jose was able to view the entire game without obstacles, but especially loved hearing the national anthem.
Jose told everyone back in Mexico about the baseball game experience and how nice other people were to him, adding how the singer asked, "Jose can you see?" at beginning of national anthem.
One day Jose wanted to see a baseball game but all the seats were full. He spotted a flagpole, climbed it, and accordingly positioned himself at the top. Jose was able to view the entire game without obstacles, but especially loved hearing the national anthem.
Jose told everyone back in Mexico about the baseball game experience and how nice other people were to him, adding how the singer asked, "Jose can you see?" at beginning of national anthem.
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Man goes into a tailor shop in Athens and tosses a pair of trousers on the counter. The tailor says, "Euripides?" "Yes," says the man, "Eumenides?"
I apologize in advance for these.
What do you do with a dead chemist …. You Barium.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
Confucius says, when naked man walk through doorway sideways, he going to Bangkok.
What do you do with a dead chemist …. You Barium.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
Confucius says, when naked man walk through doorway sideways, he going to Bangkok.
What's the difference between a Porsche and a porcupine?
A porcupine has pricks on the outside.
A porcupine has pricks on the outside.
Why should you never use metaphors when talking to a kleptomaniac?
They always take things literally.
They always take things literally.
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