Fear when representing my community in my work

The best way to get over a fear of something is just to do it (within reason, obviously). If you're worried about being pigeonholed you can always use a pseudonym for certain stories.

Personally, I write a lot of bisexual characters. I might be pandering to myself but so what? We need more positive representation. I haven't run into anyone assuming that I can only write bisexual characters but I'm not a hugely successful author or anything, so maybe other people do get pigeonholed that way. It's not something I've seen happening a lot, though.

FWIW, I'm heterosexual, but your story sounds interesting to me. There was a point where I realized that even though I like speculative fiction because it's not supposed to be about the same old, same old, too many of the books and authors I was gravitating towards (and finding easily on shelves) were by and about people who are just like me--white, American (or British), "straight," cisgender and so on. I wanted to change that, because it feels like the right thing to do. However, I've also come to realize that it's kind of dull to only read stories about the same type of characters over and over. One reason I read is to see the world through eyes that aren't mine, to get inside the head of someone who isn't just like me.

I can't speak for anyone else, and I know there are certainly people out there who don't want or like diverse books and who are opposed to the very idea of promoting or encouraging them. But I think there are other people who feel as I do as well.

I do know that for many people who identify as QUILTBAG, fear can be over more than someone not liking or approving of a book, though. For many, being outed can be dangerous or put their jobs or familial relationships at risk. I can't really give advice about how to respond to any internal conflict that stems from that fear, but I'd never tell someone to put themselves in danger.

Honestly, the best way to think about it is that you are writing a character as a person first. They have their own thoughts, feelings, interests, desires, fears, etc. When you sit down to write these characters you have in mind, say to yourself, "I am writing a person," not, "I am writing a gay character," or "I am writing a trans character." Does that mean that being gay or trans isn't a central part of who they are? No, it simply means that being gay or trans is the only part of their personality and you should relegate them to just being "I'm gay/trans and I'm proud." They are a person first, don't forget that.

Scripty said:

Well, I've been out as one identity or another since I was 14, out specifically as a lesbian at 18 (it took me a while to actually figure out what was going on). I'm 23 now. Even with being out for so long (almost 10 years what the heck) I still find myself nervous to talk about anything gay with certain people...particularly my mom. So it could be that I'm worried about her judging me for writing queer content. Now I feel a little embarrassed about asking for advice on this haha...

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No need to be embarrassed. I understand where you're coming from. I'm not out to my family and since my partner is a man I can pass as straight, but I had a lot of the same fears when I started getting published. I remember writing a story when I was a kid with a bi main character which my sister read and then asked me point blank if I was bi. I panicked, lied, and we never talked about it again. Things can be complicated with family. I think most of them wouldn't care but... the ones that would. That would hurt. So far it hasn't been an issue. My (extremely Roman Catholic) dad isn't a reader so I haven't had any awkward questions from him.

ManWithTheMetalArm said:

Honestly, the best way to think about it is that you are writing a character as a person first. They have their own thoughts, feelings, interests, desires, fears, etc. When you sit down to write these characters you have in mind, say to yourself, "I am writing a person," not, "I am writing a gay character," or "I am writing a trans character." Does that mean that being gay or trans isn't a central part of who they are? No, it simply means that being gay or trans is the only part of their personality and you should relegate them to just being "I'm gay/trans and I'm proud." They are a person first, don't forget that.

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The thing is that writing a QUILTBAG (or female or PoC) character is inherently seen as a political thing. Especially if they share your identity even if they're nothing like you personality-wise. It would be great if you could write someone who wasn't straight, cis or white and they were seen as just another character. Unfortunately, society just isn't there yet. So I completely see where Scripty is coming from.

Scripty said:

But I feel really nervous writing queer and trans characters. I guess I'm worried people will think that, since I'm gay, that I'm only capable of writing characters like myself. Or that I'm "pandering" to myself. Or that I'll be seen as only a gay writer and nothing else. I should be able to write a character like myself, right? Or like my friends?

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If anybody starts whining, just point to the white cis-straight characters in the same story.

Anna_Hedley said:

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The thing is that writing a QUILTBAG (or female or PoC) character is inherently seen as a political thing. Especially if they share your identity even if they're nothing like you personality-wise. It would be great if you could write someone who wasn't straight, cis or white and they were seen as just another character. Unfortunately, society just isn't there yet. So I completely see where Scripty is coming from.

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This is it exactly.

I've run across people who get quite indignant about the idea of writing gay or lesbian characters (or PoC too, for that matter) "if it's not central to the story." One guy even said, "I can see having a character be gay in a fantasy story if it allows him to resist a succubus or something, but otherwise, why mention it at all?" Which means, I assume that these people really do think being straight (and white, and male) is and should be the default norm for all characters whose orientation, gender, and race don't specifically drive the plot.

Brushing aside the fact that a person's identity will almost always impact a story in some ways (though a person who is male, straight, cis and white may take those impacts for granted and see them as a baseline norm), it seems like an incredibly narrow way of seeing the world.

My question, when I crit for someone who has a world or setting populated with what feels like entirely white, straight (and mostly male) characters is to nicely ask if there's a specific plot-relevant reason why their story setting is so un-diverse.

Roxxsmom said:

"I can see having a character be gay in a fantasy story if it allows him to resist a succubus or something..."

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Oh, lordie, this made me laugh!

Generally I am not super worried about "representation," which is kind of ironic. I spend a lot of time telling people that forced diversity kills a story, but I have some of the most diverse character casts ever put to paper. But it is simple as this and goes back to why I do think forcing representation is not a great idea. If you just think about them as a what they will fall apart. Think about them as a who. Find some part of yourself that you love or hate or just don't know what to do with, and then just build whatever skin, sex, sexuality, culture, etc. around them as you bring that character to life.