• Read this stickie before posting.

    • In order to reduce the number of new members requesting a Beta reader before they're really ready for one, we've instituted a 50 post requirement before you can start a thread seeking a Beta reader.
    • You can still volunteer to Beta for someone else; just please don't request someone to Beta for you until you're more familiar with the community and our members.

Seeking Betas for YA Fantasy HERE COMES THE SUN

Status
Not open for further replies.

Because.

told before & told again
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 30, 2009
Messages
1,202
Reaction score
54
Hello lovelies!

I’ve finished my own personal revision with Here Comes the Sun and I’m in definite need of some fresh eyes before I step anywhere near the dark depths of querying. Here is the (*pre-QLH*) query so you know what it’s about.

Seventeen-year-old Thema Sarr will kill the Chosen One.

She didn’t want the first prophecy in two thousand years to be about her. And it wasn’t. But the seer tells her someone needs to “drain the blood of the One” or her country gets destroyed by the power-hungry prodigy. So, she volunteers.

Her adoptive family rejoices as she sets off on her first assassination mission. They are a part of the Mighty Eight—a set of eight alchemist families that instill fear to protect their territories.

Thema is no assassin. Not at all. She spends most of her days making sure her dad’s books are in order and that her little brother eats more than bonbons for dinner every night. So she strikes a deal with an opposing Mighty Eight member—a rouge with more record kills than she’s comfortable with.

They trek on foot and by airship across the lands to find the One’s hideaway. But the other families want the glory and the royal watchmen want the heads of all the Mighty Eight. Now, Thema must figure out how to avoid getting killed on a mission to kill.


It’s 91k and I’m looking for more big picture issues (characterization, worldbuilding, pacing, etc.), but if a clunky sentence (or odd description, etc.) stands out to you, feel free to let me know. I’m looking for someone who can beta fairly quickly and someone who’s been around AW a little (the standard 50 posts or more thing).

I would be up for a swap of a YA (of any genre) with around the same word count (or less, but that wouldn’t be fair lol).

Send me a PM or post below if you’re interested. I appreciate any help!

Thank you! :)
 
Last edited:

Because.

told before & told again
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 30, 2009
Messages
1,202
Reaction score
54
Bumping just a bit because I'm in need of one or two more lovely peeps. No worries about the March 5th request previously mentioned in the above post. We can talk time frames for the swap/read by PM.

Thank you again lovelies! :)
 

Because.

told before & told again
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 30, 2009
Messages
1,202
Reaction score
54
True, I was thinking of doing so. I think the hesitation came from wanting to wait to post until after I got through the first beta round (just in case the beginning got scrapped or something). However that would be the one place to see if your beginning needs to get scrapped lol. I think I wanted the pages (& the story) to be in tip top shape before I even posted there. Thank you for the suggestion! :)
 
Status
Not open for further replies.