Senior Cat Stuff

ErezMA said:

The wet/dry food has been a debate among pet owners for quite a while. When doing my research before I got my cat, I liked the idea of wet food. Dry food has a lot more carbs. Consumption of a lot of carbs lead to diabetes, which is what is suspected in Lucky.

Wet food has been criticized for contributing to plaque on cat's teeth, but I'd rather deal with dental issues than things affecting organs. The way I look at cat food, dry food is like humans living off chips and crackers with added vitamins - you can live off it, but it's best not to. I look at wet food as chicken and turkey, things that are less snack and more meal. I'm sure others will disagree, but I fed my cat wet food and then a little bit of dry between meals.

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I split the difference - roughly half-wet, half-dry at each meal. The dry helped (but didn't entirely prevent) dental issues.

Yes, I think that food change could make the cat lose weight.

Most of the cats I've had much preferred the wet food but one of the cats I have now prefers the dry food.

He is the fattest cat I've ever had. I used to just leave a bowl of dry food out all the time and serve wet food twice a day. But now, because of the fat boy, I don't leave the dry food out any more.

Miss Strawberrii said:

I talked about it at lunch. I'm on my phone at the library (yay!), so I'll say what I can!

My BF doesn't think Lucky is suffering. He told me about his first cat that died, and how tht cat was trembling, mewing a lot, hiding, no longer purring, etc. My BF let the vet put him to sleep because he knew he couldn't let him suffer.

He believes Lucky is still well for his age. He still purrs when petted or held, still loves to eat, still has energy to play, and still licks us as kisses. The only difference is age catching up to him.

My BF also had a hard time trusting vets - maybe because he's still peeved at the one who mentioned Lucky had only a few months to live years ago. He says, "You can't ask a cat what's wrong, so you believe whatever the vet says is wrong. You can ask most humans what is wrong and figure out if the doctor is off or not. Babies it's a good idea to get check-ups often, same thing with kids."

He mentioned that if he thought Lucky was suffering, he'd take him.

And that's the gist.

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Ok, so your boyfriend isn't very bright, but that's not an excuse for YOU to allow the cat to suffer. What you describe is not normal. You have a responsibility to the animal you live with to get it medical attention for what seem to a whole lot of people like classic medical issues, many of which can be treated.

If it's his cat and he won't let you take it to the vet, then at least rehome your cat.

Miss Strawberrii said:

I did say "most" humans. D: I don't think he met that humans could be technical about what's wrong, but say "My hips are killing me" or something.

I also know cats purr in pain too, something about it only happening to help the pain. The only time his cat purrs is when my BF enters the room, you hold him, or pet/cuddle him. Never seen it happen randomly. Not yet anyway.

Can the difference between dry food and wet food deal with cat weight? Lucky used to only eat dry food until my BF gave him wet food one day. That's when I remember people mentioning his weight.

(Honestly, where he's lighter, he still seems big - but that might be because I see him so often).

As mentioned this will be the first time I experience the death of a pet that is impending.

Anyways I really appreciate all the concerns! :3

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No. You said he's constantly after you for food and wet isn't low calorie unless it's low calorie. A cat eating a bunch but losing weight is not any more normal than a human being eating and losing weight. Cats also should not be on a dry-only diet kind of ever.

You have no idea if the death of the animal is impending, unless you mean because you're just going to ignore its need for medical attention until it keels over, which, I have to say, is what it sounds like. I say again, rehome the other cat - animal abuse isn't ok.

ErezMA said:

The wet/dry food has been a debate among pet owners for quite a while. When doing my research before I got my cat, I liked the idea of wet food. Dry food has a lot more carbs. Consumption of a lot of carbs lead to diabetes, which is what is suspected in Lucky.

Wet food has been criticized for contributing to plaque on cat's teeth, but I'd rather deal with dental issues than things affecting organs. The way I look at cat food, dry food is like humans living off chips and crackers with added vitamins - you can live off it, but it's best not to. I look at wet food as chicken and turkey, things that are less snack and more meal. I'm sure others will disagree, but I fed my cat wet food and then a little bit of dry between meals.

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It's really not much of a debate. I don't think I've ever heard a vet say a cat shouldn't be on wet food. Some dry is ok and good the way you mention, but cats don't, by nature, drink a lot of water and thus have a lot of trouble staying hydrated. Wet food contains more water, along with, generally fewer carbs and fillers. Cats are obligate carnivores who need a meat diet and a lot of water to keep their kidney function up.

Miss Strawberrii said:

I think animal abuse is going a bit far... I could never do such a thing...

Except you've got two cats now who have needed medical attention that you did nothing for. I call that animal abuse, sorry.

Lucky's been after food since my BF met him 15 years ago. He just now has a thing for wet food. Probably because it's easier on him. I'm impending his death because he's about 80 years old in cat time. That's pretty old. Right?

It's not that old. It's not young, but it's hardly ancient. Plenty of cats live years longer - the current known living record-holder is a 28-year-old cat.

I'm not ignoring anything. Without a job, transportation, or anything like that, there's nothing I *can* do. Only his parents can help if they wish, though they don't usually lend money to us unless it's an emergency. We don't actually know of anything else down here, truthfully.

You are ignoring it. You're just saying oh well. You can call a cab, ask a neighbour for a ride; you can take money from a household account or kitty, borrow money from a friend, sell something, as others in the thread, count me among them, have said they'd do if they had an animal that needed care they didn't have the money for.

And no, I'm not giving my other cat away. He's happy here. Why else would he be so rubby, snuggly with me? What else does he have? Also, him snuggling up to the only humans he knows, who provide his food, doesn't have anything to do with his safety and care. I'm happy with him. He makes my anxiety go away when I hold him. That's about you, not him. If he gets sick and my BF does nothing, I'm done. Didn't you have a thread about you being so worried about the cat being ill but your bf wouldn't do anything, so you just hoped it'd go away? You say in this thread he had wounds you did nothing about, because bf didn't want to do anything. You don't seem done, you seem to have said, 'oh well,' and gone on about your business. Squeakers doesn't like wet food - he's a picky eater, so I can't really make him eat anything.


Or maybe Lucky intimidates him. Squeakers doesn't like being watched or hovered over when eating. My poor baby...

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I say again, give the cat to someone who will properly care for and love him.

Miss Strawberrii said:

I think animal abuse is going a bit far... I could never do such a thing...

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You are.

I'm not ignoring anything. Without a job, transportation, or anything like that, there's nothing I *can* do.

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Let me be blunt, Miss Strawberri. I've read a lot of threads by you on AW. I think everyone feels compassion for you and understands that you are in a sub-optimal situation.

But.

You basically post a lot about how you can't do anything, can't go anywhere, and feel terrible about feeling useless. And whenever people suggest doing this or that, you post a list of reasons why you can't because you are helpless and you have no choice and your boyfriend decides everything in your life.

This isn't just about a cat.

That said, you are an adult and only you can make decisions about your life, including whether or not you are going to stay in this situation. But your cat depends on you, and several people have told you very directly that it is probably suffering, it needs medical attention, and that denying it that attention is abuse.

Your boyfriend sounds like a shitty boyfriend and a shitty pet owner, but that's on him. Not doing anything about an animal suffering is on you. And if you really, truly can do nothing because you are powerless to persuade your boyfriend to do anything and cannot go anywhere without his cooperation, then you are in a shitty situation and you need to get out.

If you're staying with your boyfriend because you love him and don't want to leave him, then you're making a choice here about a lot of things, including your cats.

If you're staying with your boyfriend because you have nowhere else to go and would otherwise be homeless, then you are in an abusive situation and you need to start developing an exit plan.

Miss Strawberrii said:

I think animal abuse is going a bit far... I could never do such a thing...

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Not acting to help an animal isn't much different from actively causing it harm. Neglect counts as a form of abuse, even if it's passive. And not getting an animal into the vet because he has a bone to pick with one vet, seven years ago? Neglect at the very least. (I still have to ask: what if it was you? What if you were feeling off - you can't put your finger on it, but you know something's wrong? You can't keep weight on. You get exhausted walking to the mailbox. You're dizzy. You're not in pain, but you've lived in your own skin long enough to know that this isn't normal. And the only person who has the power to help you, the one you've trusted with your care... eh, a few years back they told him he had an infection when he just had a cold. Gave him expensive drugs and tests for nothing. Those doctors don't know squat, they just want your money. You're not screaming, and you're not bleeding, and you still giggle when he tickles you. So you're not sick. Now pipe down, will ya?)

Seriously, if you want to fob off all responsibility for yourself to your boyfriend - hey, you're an adult, you can mess your own life up all you want. It can be quite comforting, leaving Decisions and Power in someone else's hands. When you drag innocent lives into it - including pets - a Line is crossed.

Anyway, good luck with the kitties!

Miss Strawberrii said:

I dunno, some of you are making it sound easier than it is for me to do anything. I don't have any friends with money to give, no way to access his bank account, or anything to really sell. Anything I own wouldn't give me enough to help Lucky. Clothes? Books? I'd have to find a way to get a place to sell these things anyway. No money for cabs.

I probably shouldn't have brought all this up.

Maybe I should listen. Maybe I am a cruel person who abuses things.

It doesn't matter. *shrugs*

I'll just stop caring now.

Bai.

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That's fine. But the cats don't have the opportunity to ask for help on the internet. They're your responsibility.

Miss Strawberrii said:

I dunno, some of you are making it sound easier than it is for me to do anything. I don't have any friends with money to give, no way to access his bank account, or anything to really sell. Anything I own wouldn't give me enough to help Lucky. Clothes? Books? I'd have to find a way to get a place to sell these things anyway. No money for cabs.

I probably shouldn't have brought all this up.

Maybe I should listen. Maybe I am a cruel person who abuses things.

It doesn't matter. *shrugs*

I'll just stop caring now.

Bai.

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As others have said, there are charities that provide help to animals that need care that their people can't afford. You could call the vet and ask; you could find charities; you could ask a neighbour; you could do a lot of things. You don't seem to care, no, because you're refusing to do any of them.

Whoa, everyone. Maybe these two (who are actually there in person with this cat) just don't think the cat needs a vet and since they have very limited funds, they are not going to put out that money just because some people on an internet forum say so.

And maybe they are right in their choice. Since wet food has been introduced, I could see a cat going wild for it and only wanting to eat it and rejecting dry food. And yes, that cat would lose weight because the dry food is full of carbs. At least that's my experience with my cats and wet vs. dry food preference. I don't see animal abuse or neglect here. (And if you take it upon yourself to give away someone else's cat without their permission, you should probably be prepared to go to jail). Am I missing something?

Also, it sounds like this young guy is just not equipped to fully support another adult who is not his spouse. Maybe he feels like paying all of the rent, food bill, etc. rather than half is all he's able to provide. That is abuse? Or am I missing something there, too?

Fruitbat said:

Whoa, everyone. Maybe these two (who are actually there in person with this cat) just don't think the cat needs a vet and since they have very limited funds, they are not going to put out that money just because some people on an internet forum say so.

And maybe they are right in their choice. Since wet food has been introduced, I could see a cat going wild for it and only wanting to eat it and rejecting dry food. And yes, that cat would lose weight because the dry food is full of carbs. At least that's my experience with my cats and wet vs. dry food preference. I don't see animal abuse or neglect here. (And if you take it upon yourself to give away someone else's cat without their permission, you should probably be prepared to go to jail). Am I missing something?

Also, it sounds like this young guy is just not equipped to fully support another adult who is not his spouse. Maybe he feels like paying all of the rent, food bill, etc. rather than half is all he's able to provide. That is abuse? Or am I missing something there, too?

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The cat didn't go on a low-carb diet. Cats are, again, obligate carnivores. Dry food has binders and sometimes fillers, but they're often in the form of protein, like pea protein, because all cat food is high protein, and cats are not the same as humans wrt their food needs and diet consequence.

Miss Strawberii, if you think the cat needs to see a vet, feel free to PM me what you think it will cost including a cab if needed. I'll see what I can do. If anyone else can help, let me know.

Cornflake, of course cats have different nutrition needs than people do. As I hit on a bit earlier, I've always given my cats both dry food (available all the time) and wet food morning and night. All but one (of a half dozen, over time) has preferred wet food and not been overweight. One of the ones I have now prefers dry food and he got so fat I had to start only offering the dry food twice a day too, when I serve the wet food, to make him lose weight. So what I'm saying is if I understood correctly, the cat's introduction to wet food (and subsequent wanting that all the time instead of the more fattening dry food) could make the cat lose weight.

Miss Strawberrii said:

I'll stick around to respond to this thread, but it's okay Fruitbat.

They think I'm a terrible person because I don't have the guts to ask random strangers for help due to having trouble talking to people to begin with (aka social anxiety). I'm okay with that. I'm used to it.

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No one thinks you are a terrible person. Also, no one said you should ask random strangers for help.

What I think is that you are a person who's accepted helplessness and dependence as your lot in life. I think that's a bad decision, but it's your decision.

Letting an animal suffer, though, is a terrible thing to do.

Amadan said:

No one thinks you are a terrible person. Also, no one said you should ask random strangers for help.

What I think is that you are a person who's accepted helplessness and dependence as your lot in life. I think that's a bad decision, but it's your decision.

Letting an animal suffer, though, is a terrible thing to do.

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+1

Also - you have the internet. You can write clearly, and can articulate a thought. There are ways to use this to create an income. It won't be easy, but it can be done. So don't think you have no options just because you can't talk to people to their faces easily. And self-respect goes a long ways towards easing social anxiety, in my experience. Get some power back over your own life. Do not just throw up your hands in defeat.

You have words. Learn to use them.

Your cat believes in you. So do we.

I still don't get why you all are saying that the cat is suffering. Because it lost weight, even though that occurred when switched from the more fattening dry cat food to the less fattening canned cat food?

Fruitbat said:

I still don't get why you all are saying that the cat is suffering. Because it lost weight, even though that occurred when switched from the more fattening dry cat food to the less fattening canned cat food?

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That's not what was said, actually, and there's been no indication of how much the cat eats or ate specifically. This is what was said, and it's an entire list of concerning behaviours -

He used to be this fat cat and had lost quite a bit of weight. He eats anything, and has become OBSESSED with wet food. He'll follow you everywhere for that stuff.

At night he tends to wander into a bathroom, sit on the toilet and meow. We also noticed he's restless. He'll knead my BF's lap, even with his back claws, losing his balance in the process, then he lays down. He gets up not much later and goes to my lap to do the same thing.

Him and my cat, Squeakers, used to get along like friends. Now they fight. I can hear hissing and my cat's cries and they "throw each other" around against walks or doors.

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Miss Strawberrii said:

Can the difference between dry food and wet food deal with cat weight? Lucky used to only eat dry food until my BF gave him wet food one day. That's when I remember people mentioning his weight.

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@Cornflake- She said this later in the thread.

Fruitbat said:

@Cornflake- She said this later in the thread.

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Yes, but that's not clear. She remembers people mentioning the cat's weight then - when? After he'd been on a wet food-only diet, with fewer calories (because a cat constantly wanting food could eat as many or more calories of wet than more-dense dry, depending on how much of either was being eaten and what each was). It doesn't say he went on a wet food-only diet, or who noticed a change and when. Was it someone who only saw the cat twice a year? That wouldn't likely be indicative. Was it someone who saw the cat monthly and said it a few days after he'd been given wet food... and on and on with the variables.

Well, she didn't seem to be starting a thread because she was worried about the cat's health. From what I saw, it looked like people jumped to conclusions and turned it into "that cat is sick and you aren't doing a thing about it."

What I see is a logical reason for weight loss and silly things cats do. The major indication for worry, to me, would be if the cat is either not eating (which it is) or eating a lot but losing weight for no logical reason (but she introduced a logical reason). So I'll leave it to the people who are actually there to decide if the cat needs a vet, and offer to chip in if they decide it does.

Our cats are both around twelve years old and they've slowed down but they still like to play sometimes (and fight). The boy cat is attached to my husband and the girl is attached to me and it's really funny how they seem to each have the same personality as their chosen "parent."

Boy cat yowls sometimes when he can't find my husband, and carries a toy around looking for him or waits with it outside the door for hours. The girl cat used to boss him even though she's half his size but a couple of years ago he finally figured out that he's bigger than her.

I dread their passing too so I know what you mean. I think from now on I'll always keep two cats. Before these two, I always only had one at a time but it's fun to watch them interact and nice for them to have a cat friend (when they're not fighting).

Whoa, whoa, easy on the dry food praise. I know it's convenient and hygienic, but cats don't naturally drink enough to cover their required fluid intake as in nature, they cover it with prey. A diet consisting largely of kibble is a major case in renal failure and other organ issues in cats, so please, as much wet food as possible. I also suggest a drinking fountain as cats prefer moving, fresh water. Mine love it. Mini, my 15-year-old, sits in front of it and meows sadly whenever it gets unplugged and the water stops moving...